a day with a four year old

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Auntie Elizabeth, look how big my poo is! Nobody has ever said that to me before. Such a blessed moment, it brought tears to my eyes. Of course, we were in a public toilet in a busy public place at the time. And then she started singing that ridiculous happiness song, whilst I was more concerned with knowing she'd wiped her bottom properly and was washing her hands correctly. There's a time and place for songs about the greatest gift of happiness, and a poo-filled public toilet is not one of them. She has informed me that poo and wee both come from her bottom. I have explained that she has both a bladder and a bowel. I don't think she gets it yet. Later we sang Boney M's Rasputin. Ra-Ra-Rasputin, lover of the Russian Queen ... Ra-Ra-Rasputin, Russia's greatest love machine ... Hey, Niece. Do you know what a Russian is? No. Do you know what a lover is? No. That's good. You're only just four. I did actually tell her what a Russian is. What else did we sing? Boney M's Mary's Boy Child, of course. It's her favourite. She knows all the words and sings it so seriously and with such passion. Not that she can sing. If she wants to be a professional singer in the future she's going to need a lot of training. Shush now, don't tell her. But it is so very beautiful and sweet. Hey, Niece. Do you know who Jesus Christ was? No. Do you know what a hark is? No. She does know what an angel is though. Why do you sing that the wise men came from a farm? They came from afar, silly sausage! I read to her from a book today, but I don't remember which story. I kept getting my words muddled and she had to keep nudging me because I kept drifting off. Look love, if you want me to stay awake you do need to let me make myself a cup of tea. She asked for carrots for tea and then didn't eat her crusts. Apparently she wants to see well, but doesn't desire curly hair. We made Valentine's Day cards for her Mummy and Daddy. She can write her own name now. I wonder if she'll be following her Mummy to Cambridge University. Not if today's career choice is her future; today she wants go be a hairdresser. I love this little muppet so very much. Why do they have to grow up?