Our Bittersweet Day
@ElusiveButterfly (45940)
United States
May 18, 2019 7:57am CST
We started our day with a long 3 1/2 hour drive. It was raining when we started out so it made for a dreary ride. Halfway to our destination the rain clouds turned into big fluffy white cottonballs and the sun shone brightly.
Once we reached our destination it had warmed up considerably. The temperature had risen from 50 to 70 degrees F. This brought out the masses and the streets were bustling with people and cars.
Parking was a nightmare. Cars cut us off as my husband tried to park the truck. Horns blew and tempers flared. We found a parking garage which was fairly priced and right next to the courthouse.
Once inside, we were treated like royalty. The lady from the organization that was assisting with the adoption brought me a huge bouquet of flowers, Little Miss received a Teddy Bear, backpack with her initials on it, and a soft blanket. We received some good books regarding adoption.
Once inside the small courtroom, we were seated. Pictures were taken of Little Miss, my husband, and I. The judge entered the room and introduced himself. He handed Little Miss the gavel and told her to bring the court to order. With a huge smile she tapped it on the table and repeated after the Judge, I bring this court to order.
We signed some paperwork, tried to get a few more pics to include the judge with us, but Little Miss would have nothing to do with it. There were a few taken, but I have yet to see them.
It all took about 30 minutes. And in the process of a few minutes my granddaughter became my daughter.
I did message my daughter, the mother of Little Miss to let her know that it was adoption day. She only sent a heart in response. I know it weighs heavy on her knowing that she will never be able to raise her daughter. But, I am proud of her for making the decision to allow us to raise her so that she can focus on getting herself better.
As I write this I get teary-eyed. It was a day of joy, but also a sad one for my heart for my daughter.
I am strong with the knowledge that God doesn't give us more than we can handle.
42 people like this
36 responses
@LovingMyBabies (85127)
• Valdosta, Georgia
18 May 19
Congrats on the adoption being final!! No matter what God's got this and it's the best for Little Miss this way and your daughter. I know it's sad too, but try to stay focused on the positive. =) I'm very happy for y'all! 
7 people like this
@ElusiveButterfly (45940)
• United States
18 May 19
Thank you Jennifer. Our main focus is this little girl. She will have hardships to face too. Her little heart is sad too by not being able to see her mom so much. But, we turn her attention to other things and it helps.
7 people like this
@LovingMyBabies (85127)
• Valdosta, Georgia
18 May 19
@ElusiveButterfly Someday I know she will be grateful for all of the love she's had from y'all and for the raising you chose to do. =)
6 people like this
@ElusiveButterfly (45940)
• United States
18 May 19
@LovingMyBabies I know she appreciates being able to see her daughter grow up. She didn't have that with her first child.
3 people like this
@LadyDuck (458091)
• Switzerland
18 May 19
I remember you talked about this many moons ago on myLot and I am glad you finally signed the papers and you are now the official parents of Little Miss. Congratulations, you took the right decision, I am sure that your daughter is happy too.
6 people like this
@ElusiveButterfly (45940)
• United States
18 May 19
It has been a long journey. I know that my daughter appreciates that her daughter didn't get adopted out by strangers. We are happy to be the ones to raise this little one.
3 people like this
@LadyDuck (458091)
• Switzerland
19 May 19
@ElusiveButterfly It would be devastating for you and your daughter if she was adopted by strangers.
3 people like this
@ElusiveButterfly (45940)
• United States
19 May 19
@LadyDuck we did everything to make sure that it didn't happen that way.
2 people like this
@ElusiveButterfly (45940)
• United States
18 May 19
She is our main focus. Everything we do is for her.
2 people like this
@DianneN (246849)
• United States
18 May 19
I saw your beautiful photos on Facebook this morning and had tears of joy for you and Little Miss. You and your husband will give her the love and life she deserves. The clearing of the weather on your ride to the courthouse was a fortuitous sign from up above.
Btw, you look fabulous!
5 people like this
@ElusiveButterfly (45940)
• United States
18 May 19
We love this little one like she is our own. And, of course she is. I will always be her gramma, even though my legal title is mom.
1 person likes this
@ElusiveButterfly (45940)
• United States
18 May 19
Thank you. With God all things are possible and I know he will get us through the tough times.
2 people like this
@bagarad (14283)
• Paso Robles, California
19 May 19
Congratulations! I'm sure our children's grandparents had those same bittersweet thoughts when we adopted their son's children because he was in jail. They would have raised them, as they did their oldest grandchild from a different mother, but they were too old to handle children so young by the time they came up for adoption. We got to know them when the children were still in foster care and the grandparents helped get parental rights terminated to expedite the adoption. At least your grandchildren were still going to family. Our children's mother didn't want them. And that hurt my daughter, who was old enough to remember her, deeply.
3 people like this
@ElusiveButterfly (45940)
• United States
19 May 19
That is so sad. I do know many who fight to keep their children, and still have problems with addiction. They hide the fact that they are using. Sad for the children involved. They deserve a better life.
Hurtful for the child to know that their parent didn't want them. Breaks my heart.
2 people like this
@bagarad (14283)
• Paso Robles, California
23 May 19
@ElusiveButterfly I'm glad my brother's family's story had a happier ending.
2 people like this
@Juliaacv (48442)
• Canada
18 May 19
Congratulations on reaching this day finally. 
I think that its wonderful that your adoption allows your family to remain intact, maybe your granddaughter will now call you Mom instead of her birth mother, but you will always remain in each other's lives. That is so very important.
enjoy these first few very important days as an official family, you've really earned it! 
I think that its wonderful that your adoption allows your family to remain intact, maybe your granddaughter will now call you Mom instead of her birth mother, but you will always remain in each other's lives. That is so very important.
enjoy these first few very important days as an official family, you've really earned it! 4 people like this
@ElusiveButterfly (45940)
• United States
18 May 19
Little Miss has been calling me mama off and on intermittently with gramma. I accept it and embrace it.
1 person likes this
@crazyhorseladycx (39515)
• United States
18 May 19
bless y'all fer goin' ferward 'n though such's a mixture 'f great joy 'n sadness, keep'n yer heart that lil miss'll 've stability 'n yer daughter will continue her journey to healin'.
3 people like this
@ElusiveButterfly (45940)
• United States
18 May 19
Thank you! I pray that my daughter will one day prove that she can stand on her own and be completely clean and sober. I want her to continue to be a part of our little one's life.
2 people like this
@crazyhorseladycx (39515)
• United States
18 May 19
@ElusiveButterfly yer welcome! i do the same, hon. 'tis there a support group where ya live? i know there's so many who're raisin' their grands these days. i've'n aunt who raised 5.
2 people like this
@Namelesss (3368)
• United States
19 May 19
@ElusiveButterfly Don't give up hope, it took my son 20 years but he made it.
3 people like this
@ElusiveButterfly (45940)
• United States
18 May 19
Never thought I would be raising another child. But, everything happens for a reason. We know we can raise this little one to be happy, healthy, and loved.
1 person likes this
@ElusiveButterfly (45940)
• United States
24 May 19
@akalinus I doubt the father ever will. But, who knows. Praying for my daughter to pull through.
@akalinus (40440)
• United States
19 May 19
@ElusiveButterfly That is the important thing. Maybe someday the parents will get it together enough to have a relationship.
1 person likes this
@moffittjc (118442)
• Gainesville, Florida
18 May 19
Congratulations on adopting Little Miss! You did the right thing...for you, Little Miss, and your daughter. God has his hand in all of this. Just as you drive started off dreary, but turned to sunshine, so will this entire situation. Over the long run, the sun will shine brightly on Little Miss!
3 people like this
@ElusiveButterfly (45940)
• United States
18 May 19
Thank you Jeff. As a family we will stay strong. My daughter may not be completely on board about it now, but I know she will be one day. We are not keeping her from being with her daughter. We want her to be a part of her life.
The only difference is we will be raising Little Miss, making the decisions for her, guiding her in the right direction.
2 people like this
@ElusiveButterfly (45940)
• United States
22 May 19
@moffittjc Thank you. Truly one of the hardest things I have ever had to do in my life. But, I'm up for the challenge.
2 people like this
@moffittjc (118442)
• Gainesville, Florida
22 May 19
@ElusiveButterfly I commend you for not only committing to guide Little Miss in the right direction, but to also encourage her mother to continue to be an active part of her life.
2 people like this
@ElusiveButterfly (45940)
• United States
18 May 19
In the beginning my daughter did fight it. But, she didn't do a thing to get herself to the place she needed to be in order to get her daughter back. It saddens my heart.
2 people like this
@ElusiveButterfly (45940)
• United States
19 May 19
@cintol They actually gave her 2 years and she is still struggling.
2 people like this
@cintol (11261)
• United States
18 May 19
@ElusiveButterfly Sounds like my cousins daughter, she has had a year to get her life together but I guess her little boy wasn't worth it to her. I am sorry your daughter did the same, it is sad
2 people like this
@Courtlynn (66921)
• United States
18 May 19
I'm so happy for you, and little miss, that the day had finally came. I wish you the best life together.
3 people like this
@ElusiveButterfly (45940)
• United States
18 May 19
Thank you Courtney. I am sure there will be challenges, but I am ready for it!
2 people like this
@ElusiveButterfly (45940)
• United States
18 May 19
@Courtlynn I hope that one day we can all meet. Thank you for being a good friend.
2 people like this
@Courtlynn (66921)
• United States
18 May 19
@ElusiveButterfly probably, but you got this, for sure!
2 people like this
@Hannihar (129470)
• Israel
19 May 19
@ElusiveButterfly
That must have been hard for your daughter to give up her child but probably glad she will be staying in the family. Congrats to you.
2 people like this
@ElusiveButterfly (45940)
• United States
19 May 19
She sobbed as she left the courtroom that day. I did as well. She was going to contest the state's decision to have her parental rights taken away from her. But, after much thought, decided it was best to move forward and do what was right for her child. I commend her for that.
1 person likes this
@Hannihar (129470)
• Israel
19 May 19
@ElusiveButterfly
I can imagine how she felt but she did the right thing considering the circumstances.
1 person likes this
@1hopefulman (45123)
• Canada
18 May 19
It' s admirable to see your faith and I hope that all works out well! 
2 people like this
@ElusiveButterfly (45940)
• United States
18 May 19
We know that it will all work out. It takes a village to raise a child. We have a lot of love and support from family and friends.
1 person likes this
@amadeo (111948)
• United States
18 May 19
@ElusiveButterfly I try my best to bring some joy there.I am here
1 person likes this
@ElusiveButterfly (45940)
• United States
19 May 19
Little Miss has come far since she walked into our home. She continues to be healthy, happy, and safe.
1 person likes this
@rakski (112925)
• Philippines
19 May 19
@ElusiveButterfly I am glad to hear that
1 person likes this
@lookatdesktop (27129)
• Dallas, Texas
18 May 19
I cried after reading this. You are blessed for what you have done, to help your daughter and your beloved little grand daughter. Not many would have done what you have done. My hat is off to you.
2 people like this
@ElusiveButterfly (45940)
• United States
18 May 19
Thank you! The day my daughter signed over her parental rights, the State's Attorney commended me and my husband for stepping up to be the adoptive parents of our granddaughter. She asked me if I had ever thought I would be raising a child at my age. My answer was no. However, it is something that I was quick to say yes to and have never regretted it.
I was ready to retire and do things I have always wanted to do. I will still do them all, just with the company of my daughter who will still be my grand.
1 person likes this
@thelme55 (76476)
• Germany
19 May 19
Congratulations! That is a great day to celebrate. I am sure your Little Miss is very lucky to have you as an official parents for your grandchild. I am sure too that your daughter is happy because she knows you will take good care of her daughter.
2 people like this
@ElusiveButterfly (45940)
• United States
24 May 19
My daughter gives us space to allow us to raise Little Miss. She can visit as often as she wants. But, I know that she does better with less frequent visits. Very difficult to manage.
1 person likes this
@arunima25 (85314)
• Bangalore, India
18 May 19
This one is a real heart touching post. You have ended it so beautifully with the line that God doesn't give us more than we can handle. I am sure that God has helped Miss Little get a very loving and caring grandparents who are now her parents. May God shower more blessings on you and your family.
2 people like this
@ElusiveButterfly (45940)
• United States
18 May 19
We have been so blessed with the gift of this child.
1 person likes this
