Bad Party Guests

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Christmas and New Year’s Eve party time looms, and though most people will be well behaved, a few selfish idiots will spoil it all for some of their friends too. There will be the guest who asks if s/he can bring a friend (a plus one) and then turns up with six. Some guests will bring children, without asking simply through not wanting to hire a baby sitter and the children will run riot round the house all night. Asked to bring some beer, they either won’t bring any or bring the cheapest gutrot attainable and then drink all the best and most expensive beer and spirits others bring along, and probably steal some away too. They may also take the gutrot home with them too, as it can then be taken to future parties. The guest who brings bags specially to plunder the buffet table leftovers or even taking food from it for the bags before the buffet even starts. Another guest will eat half or more of a twelve serving cake like a gateaux and commit other acts of greed. There will also be someone who hacks a cake to crumbs rather than cutting it neatly. Spillages of food and drink won’t be addressed. There will be the guest who brings his or her own music cd’s or MP3’s immediately implying that your selection, no matter how diverse, is not good enough. They will also or alternatively commandeer the music play system, making it skip tunes they dislike, in effect being the DJ for the night. Your CD’s will be scattered around., scratched, put in the wrong boxes or even used as drink coaster mats. I have been at parties where a guest, without asking the hosts, suddenly decides to liven thing up with a game like charades or even fetches in and sets up a karaoke machine. There will be the lecherous creep, and the self-appointed funny guy who draw his attention to every pending act of flatulence as if it is the funniest thing you will ever hear or smell. Private bedrooms will be invaded. Guests will leave tidying up to the hosts. One lady told me and my aunt to leave the used dishes for my Mum to shift later at my step-father’s funeral party she, the widow had organized. We both told the lady exactly what we thought of her. There will be the private party within the party, with a special, rare or strong brandy or vodka shared only between an elite few with other guests deemed unworthy of a share. You may have a show recording to watch at a later date but without permission someone unplugs the set to charge up a phone. There will be the pedant who dominates every conversation, interrupting everyone, butting in, mansplaining, Man-terrupting, getting quite hostile and aggressive to anyone who disagrees with him or dares correct him. If another speaker stalls or makes a slight factual error this is used as an excuse to take over the discussion which becomes a monologue. Other guests will tolerate this cowardly behaviour which just fuels his Narcissistic ego further. One scumbucket I see regularly at parties silences me and others by waving his arms as if swatting flies and carries on blathering his latest bumper book of facts findings as if we are just some background irritation in the conversation he has effectively hijacked. I find such behaviour deeply worrying and intimidating, especially when others present tolerate it. The worst thing about becoming acutely aware that a guest is problematic is that the other guests fail to notice or care to help stop it, and many think the problem-maker is alright or even cool. There will be the guest who sneeringly examines your books, music, wallpaper, etc and always have a better newer version than you, mocking your 20 inch TV, your use of Windows XP, your garden not being four acres like his, etc. If someone leaves or just gets out of earshot they can become the subject of gossip. Another guest just won’t leave until virtually ordered to do so. Welcome to Hell – Same time next year. Youtube – It’ s My Party And I’ll Cry If I Want To Arthur Chappell