Short story: When toilet paper became the new currency in Australia

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Selfishness rules down-under, in more ways than one. Perhaps the "me first" attitude is very hard to overcome. At the moment, Australia is the laughing stock of the World. Everyone here is hoarding toilet paper, because of the coronavirus scare. The shops have all been emptied out of toilet paper. For the last week, and a half, none has been available at all. People panic-buyed, up to 60 to 80 packets, in one buy, wheeling out two or more trolleys filled, to the brim, with their booty. If they had large families, the kids were also seen pushing trolleys, full of the new paper gold too. Now, my wife, and myself, just bought our usual amount, one packet, thinking that this craze would not last long, but it has. Now, I was thinking, maybe, while it was available, I should have at least bought two packets instead of that only one. So yesterday, I go down there early, around 7 am, in the morning, none there. I go down there again, around 3 pm in the afternoon, as a new supply, was supposed to come in then, the store manager had told me, looking hopeful, as he said this to me, assuring me that this would happen. (The truck was expected between 12 noon and 3 pm, he had assured me.) Nothing arrived. Again, I went down there around 7 pm, thinking that the new supply might be in by now, just arrived a little bit late. Nothing again. We have my wife's old father coming here on Sunday to stay for a few months. We wanted some more paper for him. None available. Then this morning, the larger supermarkets opened up at 6 am. By 6.30 am, all of the stock was gone. Even the news is reporting on this, as well, as the highlite of their bulletins. I went to another supermarket then, which opens later, at 8.30 am. I saw people coming out with one packet of toilet paper, stuffed under there arms each. They are limited now to one packet per customer. I smiled to myself. The truck must have finally arrived. At least that rule, seems to be being enforced. Maybe there is a chance for me here to get one too. I might be lucky here, at long last, I thought, to myself, rubbing my hands together, gleefully, in anticipation, even though I had been so disappointed, and let down just the day before, and the day before that too, though, I never mentioned that here, above. I went into the store. I saw an old lady, slowly wheeling her trolley up towards the toilet paper stock there, on the shelf. I quickly scuttled past her, nearly knocking her large trolley aside, in my haste, and I picked up the very last packet of toilet paper. She arrived then, huffing and puffing. She had been trying to walk a little bit faster, as she had seen my evil intent. Now, what did I do? Did I keep it for myself, or did I altruistically give it to this dear old lady, with her walking stick, already waving at me, so angrily? What would you have done? I took it home for my poor old father-in-law, of course. My wife would have throttled me, otherwise. I, too, have caught too, this "me-first" attitude. It's currently affecting more people here than the coronavirus. This half-open packet of toilet paper (see photo) was found on the otherwise now empty shelf. Somebody, must have stuffed a few extra rolls, aside from their allocated, limited one packet, down their pants, on the way out of the shop. I saw this there, and I offered this to the old lady. She whacked me hard with her stick. I dropped the full packet of toilet paper, that I was carrying. She picked it up quickly, sprightingly quickly, for such an old lady. I took the half-opened packet home for myself, having to pay full price for it, though, at the counter. I was taught a painful lesson by an old bird, who pecked on me viciously, until, I gave her my worm, which she savoured, I bet, all of the way home. Photo Credit: The photo used in this article belongs to me, the author, of this fictional piece of writing. The value of a roll depends on the roll of the roller, or is that meant to be on the roll of the dice?