The No Insurance Life Insurance Anomaly

@WorDazza (15833)
Manchester, England
January 14, 2021 3:52pm CST
Prior to my much anticipated (and tragically abbreviated) retirement in December 2019 I was a worth a small fortune. Dead! My employer offered a generous death in service benefit which, upon my untimely demise whilst in their employ, would furnish the grieving Mrs. WorDazza with a lump sum of seven times my annual salary as well as an annual pension equivalent to one third of my annual salary. I spent a lot of my time watching my back I can tell you!! After retiring I realised I needed to replace the generous package supplied by my erstwhile employer but, me being me, I kept putting it off. Then one day it hit me. Well actually Mrs. WorDazza almost hit me as she came out of the bathroom and almost knocked me down the stairs. "That was close" she chuckled "although you're not worth bumping off now". So there you have it. The best form of life insurance for me is to not have any life insurance. And that realisation led me to become even more indispensable by accepting an offer I wasn't allowed to refuse and start working again in December raking in a tidy hourly rate for sitting in my spare room for six hours per day ensuring a high end car manufacturer can get new software onto their vehicles when required. So no life insurance and a tidy little earner make WorDazza a safe boy. And there you have it. You now know, albeit in a somewhat circumlocutory fashion, why I haven't been around here much and, if you're a life insurance salesman, not to bother trying to sell me any.
12 people like this
8 responses
@xFiacre (12612)
• Ireland
14 Jan 21
@WorDazza So retirement is just a state of mind after all. Maybe I'll notbeother with the charade when my time comes in 2 years and 50 weeks.
4 people like this
@WorDazza (15833)
• Manchester, England
14 Jan 21
I wasn't actually looking for a job. I was made an offer Mrs. WorDazza wouldn't allow me to refuse. To be honest I figured that if i was going to be stuck in the house for the next few months I might as well be earning some cash.
4 people like this
@xFiacre (12612)
• Ireland
14 Jan 21
@WorDazza A man confined to barracks after looking forward to retirement can be a dangerous creature. Best put him to work where he can do less harm.
4 people like this
@WorDazza (15833)
• Manchester, England
14 Jan 21
@xFiacre Indeed. Although my current employer may not agree with your last sentence!!
3 people like this
@CarolDM (203454)
• Nashville, Tennessee
14 Jan 21
Your sense of humor has been missed around here.
2 people like this
@WorDazza (15833)
• Manchester, England
16 Jan 21
@CarolDM As Jarvis Cocker said, I'll see what I can do.
1 person likes this
@WorDazza (15833)
• Manchester, England
15 Jan 21
Cheers. Not much to laugh about these days though
2 people like this
@CarolDM (203454)
• Nashville, Tennessee
15 Jan 21
@WorDazza That is why we need it more than ever.
1 person likes this
@MALUSE (69416)
• Germany
14 Jan 21
I look forward to the musings you're going to entertain us with now that you've resurrected.
2 people like this
@WorDazza (15833)
• Manchester, England
14 Jan 21
Thank you. Although I think even I'm incapable of resurrection
1 person likes this
@TheHorse (205214)
• Walnut Creek, California
14 Jan 21
Thanks for the warning. When I lied, and told Ms Horse she was on my policy, she tried to bump be off in a slow and mean-spirited fashion. She's in my freezer now.
2 people like this
@WorDazza (15833)
• Manchester, England
14 Jan 21
Are you sure she wasn't just behaving like a married woman??? You murdered your wife and put her in your freezer? That's appalling. What a waste of electricity!!
1 person likes this
@JudyEv (325337)
• Rockingham, Australia
14 Jan 21
With life insurance, you're making a bit with the insurer that you won't die. Glad you're raking in more. I'm sure you (or Mrs Dazza) will find something to spend it on at some point.
2 people like this
@WorDazza (15833)
• Manchester, England
15 Jan 21
She's already planning a major overhaul of our garden. Maybe her life insurance policy (which she doesn't know about!!) will pay out before she wastes the money on that sort of nonsense
2 people like this
@WorDazza (15833)
• Manchester, England
15 Jan 21
@JudyEv So you need to make some cash 'disappear' eh? How about I bump Vince off for 10 large and I've got rid of two problems for you!!
1 person likes this
@JudyEv (325337)
• Rockingham, Australia
15 Jan 21
@WorDazza We just sold half our water licence which means quite an increase in our funds which means quite a drop in our pension so we'll be looking to make 'adjustments' to lessen the impact. However, Vince doesn't seem very keen on just spending some of it. lol He's hard to help sometimes.
1 person likes this
@Namelesss (3368)
• United States
14 Jan 21
Forget the life insurance, you'll never get your life back at this point But now a little accident coverage might well be called for.
2 people like this
@WorDazza (15833)
• Manchester, England
15 Jan 21
That's exactly why I took up the job offer. I currently have no life so I might as well be making some money while the world is on hold.
2 people like this
@RebeccasFarm (86515)
• United States
16 Jan 21
I am glad to read you are now safe.
1 person likes this
@WorDazza (15833)
• Manchester, England
16 Jan 21
For all I know Mrs. WorDazza may have insured my life for a huge sum!!! I'll continue checking for roller skates at the top of the stairs, heavy objects balanced on top of slightly ajar doors etc. I watch cartoons. I know about these things!!
• United States
16 Jan 21
1 person likes this
@Fleura (29096)
• United Kingdom
15 Jan 21
I guess that depends on who or what you think might be responsible for your untimely demise!
1 person likes this
@WorDazza (15833)
• Manchester, England
15 Jan 21
Of course I'm such an amenable chap there can't possibly anyone who wishes me ill.
1 person likes this