I Have Made A Momentous Decision (MyLot Exclusive #613)

@xander6464 (40884)
Wapello, Iowa
August 17, 2021 10:47pm CST
I have made a momentous decision. I am capitulating to the Evil Empire Of Writers' Block. My lawyers are drawing up the Surrender Agreement as we speak and the minute they are finished, they will sue for peace. Some of my advisors are urging me to accept an unconditional surrender but I told those losers, "NO WAY! I'm just surrendering! I'm not giving up!" So you can bet your bottom bagel this treaty is going to be loaded with conditions. No more brown M&M's in my dressing room! And many others. But you can read about those details in tomorrow morning's Failing New York Times. What those lying jackals probably won't tell you is how The Evil Empire Of Writer's Block has been illegally harassing me all day. It's not just not being able to come up with a blog post today. It began early this morning when I began a new novel about time travel. I finished 35 pages and then showed it to my Agent, Drusilla. Dru read all 35 pages, handed them back to me and said, "Why did you give me this? I'm not wrapping any fish today." She's usually not that polite but that's beside the point. The point is that that's when I realized this day would live in infamy. I knew I had suffered a Pearl Harboresque sneak attack because instead of unfairly criticizing details, she was rejecting the whole thing. Plot, tone, pacing, characters, settings and many others. The whole enchilada. After I thought I got a lot done! So, yeah, I'm going to get conditions! Lots of them!
5 people like this
3 responses
@DaddyEvil (137142)
• United States
18 Aug 21
She could have told you she'd use it for flooring the bird cage... *shrug*
4 people like this
@xander6464 (40884)
• Wapello, Iowa
18 Aug 21
She uses her Alfred E. Neuman pictures for that.
3 people like this
• Preston, England
18 Aug 21
I think the Muse, Caliope (Greek Muse of creativity and poetry, art, writing, etc) keeps amusing herself by inspiring me to mistake any old tosh for high art - I keep saying, yeah, yeah, very funny, Caly, but now can we do it properly, but she will carry her little joke too far.
3 people like this
@xander6464 (40884)
• Wapello, Iowa
18 Aug 21
Sometimes you have to show her who's boss.
1 person likes this
• Preston, England
18 Aug 21
@xander6464 undoubtedly she is
1 person likes this
@xander6464 (40884)
• Wapello, Iowa
18 Aug 21
@arthurchappell And she thinks she knows everything.
1 person likes this
@GreatMartin (23676)
• Ft. Lauderdale, Florida
18 Aug 21
With that title I thought you were going BACK into the closet!!!
1 person likes this
@xander6464 (40884)
• Wapello, Iowa
18 Aug 21
Is that even possible?