Have you ever lost somebody?

@dawnald (85135)
Shingle Springs, California
October 28, 2021 10:37pm CST
I guess I've been very lucky. I didn't lose anybody I was close to until I was in my 40's and I lost my mother. But I haven't lost a child or a sibling or a close friend to death. My partner lost his daughter 13 years ago. Someone shot her, and they have never found out who did it. She was 19 and left a baby behind. Right around this time of year, he gets really quiet and sometimes very grouchy, and sometimes he needs to get out of the house so that he doesn't lose it with anyone. If you've lost somebody suddenly like that, how do you deal with it? And if you're with someone who's lost someone like that, how do you handle it?
12 people like this
10 responses
@t100068 (289)
29 Oct 21
Years ago, I lost my grandfather because he was smoking for years and it became too much. My grandfather had a lot of health problems and unfortunately, I wasn't able to see him before he passed away. I'm not sure how to handle it because I'm still grieving. Are there any tips or advice that you recommend?
3 people like this
@dawnald (85135)
• Shingle Springs, California
29 Oct 21
Just grieve in your own way and your own time. Only you can decide what's right for you.
@Deepizzaguy (94552)
• Lake Charles, Louisiana
29 Oct 21
The best way to handle the loss of a loved one is to know that they will be reunited in the next lifetime. It is in the book written by the late minister Herbert W. Armstrong (1892-1986) called "Mystery Of The Ages."
2 people like this
@dawnald (85135)
• Shingle Springs, California
29 Oct 21
My partner believes that too, but he still has a really hard time with it.
2 people like this
@Deepizzaguy (94552)
• Lake Charles, Louisiana
29 Oct 21
@dawnald I know how it feels.
@sallypup (57888)
• Centralia, Washington
30 Oct 21
My brother suddenly passed away when he was 43. Two days before Christmas. I ended up comforting my Mom; staying at her house for the night, calling a religious person over to talk with her, just dealing with it. I ended up hammering on another brother's door until he let me in. I had to tell him the shocking news in his driveway. Sometimes you just have to be tough.
1 person likes this
@RubyHawk (99425)
• Atlanta, Georgia
29 Oct 21
My son passed away last year and my mate passed away six weeks ago the hurt is almost unbearable but you take each day the best way you can. Sometimes you want to roll over and die but you get up and pass the days And night the best way you know how. It’s helped me to vent to my friends on Mylot. About all anybody can do to help is listen.
1 person likes this
@Yadah04 (3363)
• Philippines
29 Oct 21
The most recent loss I've had is that of my mom-in-law. It has been over a year already but the grief remains. She left an aching void inside. We can't really forget, or get over the loss, we just have to deal with it. Acceptance.
1 person likes this
@solidcodes (1690)
• Philippines
29 Oct 21
All of us will die someday weather we like it or not. So crying is a good way to express our feelings. But will accept that we are all will die. so by accepting it will reduce bad feeling emotion.
1 person likes this
• United States
30 Oct 21
There really isn't much to do other than to give him space. He knows that you are there for him, because you are there each day for him throughout the year. For him, each anniversary likely brings up questions of "what if?" He likely questions if there was something different that could have been done somewhere along the way that would have kept her safe. He is imagining what her life would have been. He is thinking about any disagreement or misunderstanding they may have had-- no matter how slight. He is cursing words that he said, and he is regretting things left unsaid.
@dawnald (85135)
• Shingle Springs, California
30 Oct 21
Probably truth in that, but he is also upset at his ex wife, who passed away, because it came to us afterwards that she might have known who the shooter was. Very sad.
1 person likes this
@dawnald (85135)
• Shingle Springs, California
31 Oct 21
@wilsongoddard And frustrating...
1 person likes this
• United States
31 Oct 21
@dawnald Ouch. That makes it even more complicated.
@jstory07 (134465)
• Roseburg, Oregon
29 Oct 21
All you can do is let him be alone and do what he want. Losing someone you love is really hard.
1 person likes this
• Sonora, California
29 Oct 21
I’ve watched more people than I want to count, family friends a father and son, brutally Murdered in 1197 when I was nineteen, my Nonno, Mom’s Dad when I was eight, Dad’s Mom when I was five, Nonna, Mom’s Mom just a couple of weeks before my twenty fifth birthday, my best friend in 2007, when I wasn’t her 30, and she wasn’t yet 37, A friend who was really more a brother on New Years Day 2014, you just go day by day, but by far the hardest two were when I watched a friend lay her nine year old son to rest, and the murder of our family friends..l
1 person likes this
@Anqaya (3033)
• United States
29 Oct 21
I lost my great grandma when i was 4. She fell off the bed when we were not home. When we came back, i was the first one to see her...lying on the floor and huge bleeding from her head. I was not scared at all bc i didn't even understand what happened. But now, almost 14 yrs later, I'm very scared of blood......cause whenever I see blood I remember my great grandma.... And I'm sorry about the girl, can't believe who shot her.
1 person likes this