MOMENTS WASTED!

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It's been more than 20 years that I have been separated and I was so very aloof with relationships for my worries of being charged against the law. Even with my kids approval to find someone I can be with to go on with life. Then I met someone and have him as my LDR or Long Distance Relationship. We have been having an affair despite the distance we have been for 15yrs. My kids knew about it. The fact that he even treated my kids like his own. Lately my kids decided to visit their father and found out that he has a live-in partner for almost 20years. And they get along together very well. Well, for me it's fine. Since he's having health problem and the other woman was looking after him. I just feel bad that it wasn't fair on my side because I declined to be in a relationship with someone who wants to live with me. Due to fear of being sued. I am 66 now and wishing I can live a life with someone who loves me and I loved too. But I guess it's too late to be in that relationship anymore. If I only knew it in my early 50's I would have moved on with the man I want to be with and live a happy life. Life is so unfair. I feel sad I was spared with love & joy. :(