Rant ~ Part Two

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I was not fun to be around yesterday. The kids were somewhat dumbfounded. I am usually fun-loving and easy. I was upset with my daughter big time. She waited until the time my grandson said he would go help her mop the living room (4p) to do the pick-up and things that I had been trying to get her to do since 1p. Very frustrating. And the vacuuming needed to be done up here. She finally got that accomplished. My grandson came into my room at one point and lay down on the carpet which is what he does when he wants to have an in-depth chat. So he told me he was unhappy with how I was treating his mom. That was fare and honest. I told him I had helped his mother all of her life. I know she had a learning disability and I have tried to always be patient and tried to remain calm in all situations that arose. It just gets to a point every so often that I get frustrated and I get upset. I also told him something perhaps I shouldn't have but it just came out. His mother came to me when he was just an infant(20+ years ago) and pleaded with me to take her and him in (after she had abandoned me with my granddaughter in the two-bedroom we had together about a year previously.) Instead, she quit her job and followed her boyfriend(Josh's dad) around, was homeless, did drugs, and cared nothing about her daughter or the sacrifices I had to make(I had guardianship of my granddaughter from the time she was 3 until about 15)and she would rather do drugs and be with Matt. But, she came begging me to take her and her infant in. H&W had done a home visit and told her that she either found a home for herself and her infant or my grandson would be taken away. So, yes, I took her in and the only thing I asked for was that she keep the house clean and take care of Josh. Okay, fast forward to yesterday and my grandson's silence. He acknowledged what I had said, got up, and went into his room. When he came out about an hour later it was as if nothing had happened. I don't know if he had known all of that before or not but I know he has come to some sad realities about his dad over the last few years. So, all three of us heal from this and move on. I am sorry for any part I played in making my daughter sad, hurt, mad, etc. She has been sheltered and never has worked much all of her life. But, if she lives with me she will keep our home clean or else. If we have to fight about it--fine. We'll fight. But, I won't live in filth and she will keep it clean. Now aren't I the mean b*tch? Just to have a clean home.