An SPTV Loss

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I have been a fan of SPTV for over a year now. They are ex-scientologists who have channels on YouTube and each relates to their personal experience in different ways. Some are better than others. There are probably hundreds, I listen and am a fan of about 5. A few are not ex-Scientologists but have helped in the cause in one way or another. Last night a man who is husband to a YouTube content creator and ex-scientologist died of cancer. The entire SPTV 'clan' came together to give their support and regard in their own personal way to Natalie, the wife. It was very passionate and heartfelt. You can't help but cry and feel emotional when someone passes especially of the horrid cancer. You learn to live with the loss but, you never get over it. I feel for Natalie and am glad she has this huge group to help her through it. This entire thing made me think of my experience with cancer. I lost a younger sister to my BFF. A dear woman who died way too young. I also lost both my mom and my dad. I decided it would be cathartic to write out about my mom and dad. My mom died of rectal cancer. It was found after she had been sick with a mysterious illness we couldn't quite figure out. When she didn't get any better after about ten days and nothing we knew helped I made her let me take her to the doctor. This was back in the late 90s so no, there was no possibility of it being COVID. She was diagnosed and surgery was done to remove the cancer. There was a very small amount that couldn't be removed because it was too close to the spine. My mother died due to that 2% of cancer that they couldn't remove. My father died of pancreatic cancer also in the late 90s. He had been in the Navy so he was being seen at the Veteran's Hospital. Pancreatic cancer is very hard to diagnose and as far as the doctors knew he had a mysterious stomach issue. Cancer never came into the equation until he was in Stage Four and only had a short time left. He had his older brother call and request me to come see him. He and I had been estranged for about 25 years due to an incident that occurred back when my daughter was just a toddler. I was thrilled to hear from his brother since I had not seen my father in many years. I took a small photo album I had to show him my kids and went to visit my dad at the VA Hospital. He was so emaciated, with sunken cheeks and eyes. He looked awful but he was my dad and I gave him a big hug. He had this huge smile on his face that never left during our entire visit. After I left I realized that his family didn't care much for me because our estrangement had been my decision. So, out of respect for his family, I didn't go back to see him for a couple of days. When I did call the hospital to find out his condition and that he could still have visitors I learned he had died. His family had never notified me. I was devastated. I went to the graveside after his funeral and said my goodbyes. Family members milled around and I soon got back into my car. All of a sudden a woman with long white hair and crazy eyes stuck her head through my window and told me about how horrible I had been to my father. She reminded me of a banshee and I didn't know who she was. Now I think she was his sister, Connie. Boy! Had she changed? That was my last memory of my dad's passing. Cancer is an ugly disease. It has no respect for age. It even takes our animals. It sneaks up slowly and takes our most precious gifts away.