Not Even Remotely

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I was working for an electronics company who offers tech support services. I was on the phone with a senior citizen who needed help learning how to use his printer. I offer to get remoted into his computer to walk him through it. There is where the fun started. I advised him to open a web browser to visit the URL. He asked me what is a web browser. I had to explain to him to open the program he uses to go on the internet. Thankfully he uses Google Chrome so our software would work with no issues. I directed him to go to a specific website so I could get remote access to his computer. He started reading off some different website names and descriptions. I was silent for a few seconds trying to determine what he is talking about. He was reading off the google search results. Instead of going straight to the URL I gave him, he searched for it and had no idea which one to click. It took about 20 minutes to explain how to go directly to a site instead of searching for it. Once we finally got to the site, and he put the code in to begin the process, it downloads a program you need to run to allow access. Another 10 minutes explaining how to run the program and how to get it working so I could access his computer finally. I finally got access to the computer, and begin to pull up the utility to add a printer. I noticed it wasn't finding the printer, so I asked "Is the printer plugged in?" Him: "No,does it need to be?" It was at this point, I prayed for death.