sustenance in the household...
By lei ila
@leiilaoc (14)
Indonesia
February 2, 2026 10:45pm CST
There are many discussions or debates around me: husband and wife are partners and income in the household is mutual sustenance for both vs the husband must be the full provider and the wife's share of the sustenance actually comes from the husband (the wife becomes a traditional trophy wife). It's already 2026, why is there still such a debate?
8 people like this
7 responses
@arunima25 (93118)
• Bangalore, India
3 Feb
The debate will continue. ...Each one will have their points to prove their arrangement the best and logical. People never stop judging others. Any such thing is a personal matter between the two involved in the relationship. Let them handle the way they feel works better for them..
2 people like this
@arunima25 (93118)
• Bangalore, India
5 Feb
@leiilaoc Recently in my workshop for women, I have met many who feel a burden to be working out of their home because of all this new women empowerment thing going around. They feel happy and fulfilled being a full time homemaker. And I know of men who would love to be stay at home Dads or homemakers but feel the societal pressure of being a provider or fear being judged. People can take decisions for their lives.
also, the topic of feminine energy healing is rising, which becomes a contradiction with the idea of ??independent women.. so confusing and exhausting, I want to avoid such conversations.
@Ineeddentures (23688)
•
3 Feb
It's not a debate here in Scotland and hasn't been for maybe 40 years.
Where are you from?
@Ineeddentures (23688)
•
5 Feb
@leiilaoc
A trophy wife though is something that is quite common all over the world.
Just look at the president of the United States
His wife is a trophy wife
She doesn't love him, I bet she cronges when he goes near her
@indahwow (119)
• Yogyakarta, Indonesia
6 Feb
In my view, this debate still exists not because society hasn’t progressed, but because people’s realities are different. Some couples are comfortable with the husband being the main provider, while others choose to be equal partners who share financial responsibilities. Both arrangements can work as long as they are mutually agreed upon and no one is being harmed.
Problems usually arise when one model is treated as the only “right” one and forced onto everyone else. In reality, economic conditions, job opportunities, health, family values, and personal choices vary greatly from one household to another.
What matters most is not who earns the money, but how responsibility, fairness, and mutual respect are practiced within the marriage. As long as there is clear communication, consent, and no one feels controlled or diminished, any division of roles is valid.
It may be 2026, but relationships are still about communication and agreement. It’s not about choosing between traditional or modern roles, but about finding the arrangement that is most humane and realistic for the people involved.
