a toxic family member has a surgery tomorrow

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and i wished her all the best. She wrote me some harsh things in her last email (she was always harsh to me and that always shocked me) and i replied i won't contact her ever again but i hope this message could be an exception, mylotters. it's tough wishing someone luck while the same person never wished the same to you. but, only that. no, i can't take care of her. she has more important people than me, always had and i think she can manage. i am more afraid about my life and my situation but, it can't be like this forever, i hope. i also hope she will reach hospital on time cause, the bus and tram drivers are on their 3rd day of strike here. people always think families get estranged for small things and over night. no, it is never like that. not in my case. also, it's hard to be a bigger person in life or maybe in this country of mine. i sometimes wish i was that turtle from kung fu panda and that i'm so chill about everything.