Could someone give me genuine advice pleasee
By Aparna Sen
@Dreamerby (10413)
Calcutta, India
October 15, 2026 1:03am CST
Okay so I came to mylot because people here are older and more experienced in life than me. So, as you know, I had a really bad breakup last year. Few months later, I met someone online through a mutual friend. We talk over video calls but its like we really love each other. I want to date for marriage and so does he. Everything was fine...until...someone on an app(not a dating app...normal social media app) texted me saying that he liked my profile pic and he thinks I am cute. Initially, I turned him down, saying that I just came out of a relationship. But...he texted can we be friends?I didn't text back and then the next day he said Hi again. Now, Its like I feel like maybe he really likes me
or maybe its God's plan to bring us together because he texted me first whereas in this relationship I kind of arranged for the meetup.
But, what I am doing is emotional cheating, ig? I have a weakness for men who are finanacially stable. This guy who texted me on that app is doing a good job and the guy I am with is in higher studies.
I don't wnat to be a bad person. The person I am in a relationship with had been cheated on in arelationship before so I really care about him and don't want to do that to him. He says I am the best thing that ahs happened to him this year
. I feel really guilty because a small part of me wants to explore what would happen if I texted this other guy. I think I like his job and the fact that he is not giving up on me. I think these 2 things are making a small part of me want to explore what would happen.
I love the person I am in a relationship with but I also feel guilty of trying to explore what would have been if I had texted this other guy back
Please help me out. What should I do?
or maybe its God's plan to bring us together because he texted me first whereas in this relationship I kind of arranged for the meetup.
But, what I am doing is emotional cheating, ig? I have a weakness for men who are finanacially stable. This guy who texted me on that app is doing a good job and the guy I am with is in higher studies.
I don't wnat to be a bad person. The person I am in a relationship with had been cheated on in arelationship before so I really care about him and don't want to do that to him. He says I am the best thing that ahs happened to him this year. I feel really guilty because a small part of me wants to explore what would happen if I texted this other guy. I think I like his job and the fact that he is not giving up on me. I think these 2 things are making a small part of me want to explore what would happen.
I love the person I am in a relationship with but I also feel guilty of trying to explore what would have been if I had texted this other guy back
Please help me out. What should I do?6 people like this
6 responses
@Wrexxo (9413)
•
8h
Honestly the guilt you feel says a lot about you, you clearly care about him. I would ask myself if I like this new guy or just the attention and the job part. If your boyfriend is really the one you want, maybe just stop replying and give that relationship your full focus.
3 people like this
@Dreamerby (10413)
• Calcutta, India
8h
yeah I like the attention and the job part. I imagined that my future would be financially secure if something happened with this other guy. But it might not work out as well. Its like a small part of me wants to try what would happen. But its unrealistic because why would I throw away a relationship where he loves me so much and wants to marry me and both of us are comfortable with each other.
2 people like this
@marguicha (230634)
• Chile
1h
I would meet them both. Online relations are not enough for me. And just to be cautious, I´d go with someone else.
2 people like this
@Dreamerby (10413)
• Calcutta, India
43m
what would you do in cases where its not possible to meet? like they live in diff cities and your parents won't allow you to date (you can't tell them about relationships)
1 person likes this
@Dreamerby (10413)
• Calcutta, India
2h
Its like over video call, he makes me laugh and we watch movies together and stuff. He says I am his wife. I used to ffeel the same too. But the financial part makes me feel like maybe he is not the one. He can't buy me gifts. I know I am being shallow and money-minded. I don't want to be. I don't want to throw away this one otherwise good relationship just because of the money factor. But its like I don't want to live in financial insecurity.
1 person likes this
@Dreamerby (10413)
• Calcutta, India
6h
No I haven't met any of them. The person I am in a relationship with, we talk on video calls every day and we plan to meet in december
1 person likes this
@Fleura (36095)
• United Kingdom
38m
@Dreamerby Maybe I'm old fashioned but I don't think you can really consider a relationship a real romantic relationship if you have never even met. And consequently I don't think you can be cheating by communicating with anyone else.
@aninditasen (18420)
• Raurkela, India
20m
Don't make money your criteria of choosing a person as a life partner. Since you are doing your higher studies, complete it and become financially stable/ independent yourself.
