Why I WON'T add you as a friend!
By BittyBiddy
@BittyBiddy (2903)
Ireland
December 30, 2006 8:53am CST
I don't know about anyone else here, but I've had a lot of friend requests in the last couple of days and I've hit "delete" to the majority of them. I used to feel bad but I don't any more
Why do I delete them? Well, because:
a) Their posts are the type that even kindergarten children wouldn't confess to starting - Things like "What is weather", "Do you like icecream", "Saddam should be canonized"
b) Their profile is blank and they haven't posted anything
c) Out of 500 posts, all they can say is "I understand", or "I know"
d) All their posts are copied and pasted
So, if you fit into any one of the above categories and are about to click on my name to add me as a friend, FORGET IT!!! Spare me the effort of having to look at your profile and then delete your request cos I'm getting bored with it. Think me cruel if you like, but I'm just warning you beforehand - you have to be cruel to be kind.
16 people like this
92 responses
@BittyBiddy (2903)
• Ireland
30 Dec 06
Thats ok. You're quite entitled to think I'm wrong. I shall have to go on thinking I'm right though, if that's ok with you.
4 people like this
@sexaholic101 (193)
• Canada
31 Dec 06
It's hard finding a friend that will post their beliefs instead of just a unblissfull post.
@BittyBiddy (2903)
• Ireland
30 Dec 06
Yeah, I have a few on mine....although not hundreds. I think I'd be very busy replying to all their discussion if I'd hundreds of friends. There are a few that I sometimes feel like changing, but I don't want to be treating my myLot friend section like a wardrobe, ye know?
3 people like this
@BittyBiddy (2903)
• Ireland
3 Jan 07
That's odd. I can't seem to see the rest of the posts on this thread. There were 107 responses but I can only see the first page. Can anyone else see them?
1 person likes this
@iDABIErock (93)
• Philippines
31 Dec 06
i totally agree with her. maybe its your choice. there's nothing wrong with it. i think it wont feel bad to the person you will be deleting. :)
2 people like this
@peaceful (3294)
• United States
30 Dec 06
Kudo to you, Bitty Biddy!
It really makes my day to see that someone is bothering to take a firm stance on this issue.
I have been very lucky in the selection of my friends. Most of the "drifters" seem to be staying away from me and that's a good thing.
Like you, I want to keep the quality high and the experience of posting here at MyLot good as well.
Happy New Year 2007! :)
4 people like this
@breezie (1246)
• Canada
30 Dec 06
I agree with you. At first I was accepting every one that requested that I add them as a friend, but soon it became too many. I deleted those who didn't seem to make interesting posts and now I only accept those who I find their topics interesting.
@BittyBiddy (2903)
• Ireland
30 Dec 06
Oh if they don't agree it's all the better. It makes for more interesting discussion. I've added a couple of people that I have disagreed with vehemently on this site.
2 people like this
@BittyBiddy (2903)
• Ireland
30 Dec 06
Apparantly it is. I've just lost valuable point grabbing seconds by having to look it up on www.dictionary.com. I hope you're proud of yourself now. That's no butter with the beans on toast this week for our family.
3 people like this
@Justme2007 (1848)
• United States
31 Dec 06
I also agree and wish I had looked before I approved some people.
@SarahEC (545)
• United States
30 Dec 06
I've been getting lots of random friend requests, too. Most the time I just hit delete without even checking their profile. The only times I add someone is if it is someone that I've actually posted with on a topic or had some kind of discussion going. I don't know why people want so many friends on their list?
@SarahEC (545)
• United States
30 Dec 06
Yeah, I agree. I think they just add all those friends because they think those people will all respond to their discussions. That is why I only approve people who I've already chatted with. So I know they like the same things as me and will be honest and good mylot friends. I'm happy with my few friends :)
3 people like this
@matt169 (229)
•
30 Dec 06
I guess there are just some mylot types of people that think being the most popular will get them the most money sadly however although attimes it could for example if 600 friends were posting to their topics and creating a great discussion but then i am sure those 600 would expect the same in return and no human being can simply do it at all.
and i get by quite well on my own with just two friends on my list it seems.
3 people like this
@tambdy (1967)
•
30 Dec 06
So does that mean i can be your friend, lol. My posts are always long and i dont ever say i understand or i know. i never copy and paste and i think this shows in my $. Have a look at my profile some good pics of me in a kilt on there.
@BittyBiddy (2903)
• Ireland
30 Dec 06
Well now, because of the kilt I think I could forgive you no matter what you post. ;)
@rakinitin (685)
• Canada
30 Dec 06
You have good reason for choosing your friends in the manner you do. You have the right to feel the way you do and should not be judged for it. I'm not sure about you but there is a method to my madness. lol
3 people like this
@BittyBiddy (2903)
• Ireland
30 Dec 06
Sometimes I'm not sure about myself either. I wonder if I looked back on my own posts would I add me. LOL!
1 person likes this
@misskatonic (3723)
• United States
30 Dec 06
I'm with you. I get a lot of friend requests, and I've gotten pretty picky about who I approve and who I don't. I won't accept requests from people who post crappy discussions, from people who post one line responses, or from people who haven't made any posts. I don't want people like that as my friends. But they still request....
3 people like this
@BittyBiddy (2903)
• Ireland
30 Dec 06
It takes time to go through people's profile and their discussions but I think it's worth it. The good posters kind of stick out too. I've had a few occasions where I don't bother checking the profile because I've seen the poster post and their discussions have just stuck in my head.
1 person likes this
@auburndreams (838)
• United States
30 Dec 06
I've had a plethora of people from India try to add me. I also have a great many people who don't seem to speak English.
I can't agree with BittyBiddy more.
If you want to be on my friends list any of you, that is fine, as long as you can write at least five sentences that are filled with knowledge, wit, wisdom or are somewhat poetic.
I tend to add people as friends if I find myself replying to their discussions time and time again.
Brownie points if you are pagan. Fairy points if you are gay. Try not to bore me to tears. Always happy to speak to other hypnotists, artists, and travelers.
@auburndreams (838)
• United States
31 Dec 06
I think you are all of those things. This has been an interesting discussion. I think quality v quantity is usually the best choice.
2 people like this
@BittyBiddy (2903)
• Ireland
30 Dec 06
Quote "If you want to be on my friends list any of you, that is fine, as long as you can write at least five sentences that are filled with knowledge, wit, wisdom or are somewhat poetic."
Well darn it anyway, but I think that actually rules me out! LOL! :)
1 person likes this
@cajundharma (641)
• United States
30 Dec 06
One that's got me scratching my head is that I've got in my profile and interests that I'm a gay pagan, but this conservative christian keeps sending me friends requests. I've denied him twice and he's back again today...
@BittyBiddy (2903)
• Ireland
30 Dec 06
LOL! Maybe he thinks he can convert you or something. I've noticed a few of those convertor type peopley persons around the place.
1 person likes this
@WhatsHerName (2716)
• United States
30 Dec 06
I don't care much about the friend thing. I have a couple that I love having on my list because it makes it easy to find their discussions. Some I love reading because they are so funny. I think they give us the friends list to be like myspace. I think it's kind of immature to try to get as many as you can. Like elementary school some people think your worth is measured by how many friends you have. I try to check profiles before I accept friends. Some just want to spam you after they get permission to email you. You can usually tell these right away because they have the name of a site in their username or something that has to do with money.
3 people like this
@Lil_miz_ice_x (614)
•
30 Dec 06
You're completly right...I've been here under a week and have had too many requests to count...I don't get it...do people think that by adding you as a friend, it means you'll read their shi*ty little topics and pretend you care?
And another thing - why do people feel the need to leave responses that have nothing to do with your topic and ask YOU to add THEM?
If you're gonna bother trying to get me to be your friend, don't BOTHER wasting my time any more than you have to...
@Lil_miz_ice_x (614)
•
30 Dec 06
LOL! I can't help it, when people get me started, I tend to get myself worked up...I've just had a go at three different users for asking people whether they're left or right handed...I mean, what is THAT?
1 person likes this
@BittyBiddy (2903)
• Ireland
30 Dec 06
I think it's this place. I was such a placid person before I found out about this site. Now I sit at the keyboard snarling 50% of the time. My kids have started calling me Taz.
1 person likes this
@matt169 (229)
•
30 Dec 06
Too true well I have only had two friend requests so i cant speak for myself that much but from looking at members that have hundred upon hundreds of friends i cant see how they can go around and reply to each and every discussion a friend starts, ofcourse if you could you would be sitting on some serious cash but honestly i dont think there is one person on mylot that would even be crazy enough
and no i dont think it is cruel of you at all, it may sound cruel just reading it on its own for example "why i wont be your friend" as if it were a school child saying it but remember there are reasons by why you say it so it is not bad at all.
take care
matt
@euniceeleanor (5967)
• Singapore
30 Dec 06
very interesting discussion!! i used to approve every single request but it really jammed up my 'discussions your friends started' with those silly discussions. therefore, i did cleared away a lot of them...but now i still have about 200+ friends in my list...those friends are there for 2 reason 1) i enjoyed their discussions very much though they may not respond to my discussions at all 2) they really gave very good responses to my discussions....and to sum it all...i have found a group of really nice friends here in myLot! Thanks for this discussion!
2 people like this
@BittyBiddy (2903)
• Ireland
30 Dec 06
Tell me about it. I had someone on my list who started no less than 20 new discussions every day. The first couple of days I was amazed. The next day it became mildly irritating. By the fourth day I had hit on the delete key with a vengeance.
1 person likes this
@Beautiful_Nightmare (1337)
•
31 Dec 06
Very valued reasons. Another reason I won't add people as a friend is if they use too much text language - not everyone here is english so nor will they understand text talk. I also prefer them to have an avatar picture..
2 people like this
@volschenkh (1043)
• South Africa
30 Dec 06
I agree with you, one should be careful and not just accept these spammsers, By adding them as friends their time on MyLot is extended. I unfortunately was very naive in the beginning and added a few to my friends list and now I dont know hoe to delete them again. Do you have any ideas?
2 people like this
@BittyBiddy (2903)
• Ireland
30 Dec 06
If you go into your friends list you'll see that each of them has a delete button beside them. You can delete them from there if necessary.
1 person likes this
@Alexandria37 (5717)
• Ireland
30 Dec 06
I too have started deleting my so called friends, especially the ones who send private messages saying they would like to discuss money matters. I responded to one, who said she would like to help me to make some money. I was to open a PayPal account and send $3 to the first person on the list of names which she gave to me. Mind you, she didn't even tell me to add my name to the list, which is the normal thing to do, as I have got lots of these types of emails in the past. These people are just using MyLot to gain some 'Friends' so that they can extort money from them. From now on I too, will be fussy about my friends.
2 people like this
@irisheyes (4370)
• United States
30 Dec 06
So they're doing a Ponzi Scheme now on Paypal. I didn't know that.
1 person likes this
@MzLefty (311)
• United States
30 Dec 06
I think that you should give others the benefit of doubt, I do not fit into the catergory that you are describing,I do not believe in those one word anwsers or even one setence,I have the gift of gab,lol,so i tend to talk a lot,but I do not talk just to be talking,I talk because I truly have something to say.Everyone is different,and you should not judge everyone on what others may do.
2 people like this
@BittyBiddy (2903)
• Ireland
30 Dec 06
Sorry but I'll have to disagree with you on that one. I will most definately judge those that copy and paste other people's posts because in my opinion it's low, it's cheating, and it's pure slimey and they have to know what they're doing.
With some of the questions, it's hard to respond with anything other than a one word answer so maybe I'll let some of those guys escape my harsh judgement, but this only results in me adding another category to my lists of people who can't be my friends. That is category e)Those who ask yes or no questions
1 person likes this
@shirbump (84)
• Ireland
30 Dec 06
Yes I agree with you and I only started on here yesterday! I can't write posts if I don't agree or have any kind of intrest in what the subject matter is. I love the site so far I'm finding it really interesting! I've refused people too on my friend list! ;0)
@BittyBiddy (2903)
• Ireland
30 Dec 06
Shirbump, the time to reply is when you don't agree with something. Nothing like a bit of controversy to stimulate discussion. LOl! :)
1 person likes this
