Bad luck keeping friends

friends - friends
@JashleyB (1441)
United States
January 2, 2007 12:49am CST
First off just want to say that I am not depressed! I started the topic from my list and it was the closest thing I could find for this. ;) So, ever since I was about 16 I seem to have terribe luck keeping friends. I always think I'm close to someone and then later on it turns out that she wasn't really a good friend after all. It's happened a lot and I thought it was me but my parents and few true friends convinced me finally that it wasn't. Anyone else had bad luck with keeping "friends"?
1 person likes this
19 responses
7 Jan 07
I'm 17 and have two good friends whom i think i will remain friends with for many years to come. The problem with me is that i get sick of people. I am blind to their bad points to start with and as i start to realise i don't like them that much i distance myself. I have tried to get in touch with a few old friends and they don't seem to want to know me. They are more concerned with their new lives and don't want to relive the past. I can see where they are coming from though, some friendships are better left in the past.
1 person likes this
@JashleyB (1441)
• United States
8 Jan 07
I think I have that same problem! I always start out really liking someone but eventually things come out in their personality or something that starts to bug me so I distance myself.
@babykay (2133)
• Ireland
2 Jan 07
I think that while a friend and you may be mutually supportive and enjoying each others company, this may not last forever. At least thats the way it is for me. I have had many friends who have drifted apart from me or me from them. The way I look at it is, nothing lasts forever! Apart from the love you have for your child of course...
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@JashleyB (1441)
• United States
8 Jan 07
Thank you for the response. That is so true!
• Ireland
2 Jan 07
I am very selective about my friends so I just have one very good close friend who would lay down her life for me. Unfortunately she moved to the UK some time ago, but we talk regularyly on the phone and we visit each other a few times during the year. I prefer to call all the other so called friends acquaintances. I know some of them would like to consider themselves as my friends, but I don't want to be friends with them. I like my friends to be genuine, otherwise, I feel I am better off without them.
@JashleyB (1441)
• United States
8 Jan 07
That's true. I also have a good friend who moved away so we now keep in contact through letters and email. I like my friends tobe that way too. They reallyaren't true friends if they don't.
@maryannemax (12170)
• Sweden
2 Jan 07
i used to have many bestfriends. atleast i thought they were good persons. but later on, i realized that they were not good people. they say bad things about me. they envy me. i don't really know why since i always try to be nice to them. true friends are hard to find. they are rare in this world. and i am glad that i have one true good friend in this world. she's been my bestfriend for 12 years now. and she still is the best. i won't leave her nor allow anyone to take her number 1 rank as a friend in my heart.
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@JashleyB (1441)
• United States
8 Jan 07
That is wonderful! Thank you for the respones.
@mkup30 (494)
• United States
2 Jan 07
i for sure can relate to this, so many friends turned their backs on me or stabbed me in the back, i used to think it was me also, but realize now that there are just many rotten ppl out there, selfish also and we have to pick the few good ones from all the bad apples out there, i do have a best friend for yrs an amazing girl and we are close and have always helped eachother out, so it is worth it to have one good friend even though in the process of finding them you may get screwed over a lot
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@JashleyB (1441)
• United States
8 Jan 07
SO well said. Thanks. I do have a good friend wh has stuck by me for years. So it is worth it sometimes. If you can handle it lol.
@Sidders (521)
• United States
2 Jan 07
I have lost friends because I felt that I was the only one keeping in touch. After a while, it just does not seem to be worth my time. I hate excuses why they have not called. So I just loose their number.
1 person likes this
@JashleyB (1441)
• United States
8 Jan 07
Good idea! ;)
• United States
2 Jan 07
My experience with friends is that you can never trust your girl friends they will always stab you in the back, sleep with your man or run up your cell phone bill. I have just warded having girls as friends off all together. I hang out with guy friends mostly my husbands friends. I don't even like to get close to thier wifes or girlfriends. Women can be coniveing and shiesty. I know I am a woman too and I was that way too in my younger years. Now that I've settled down I am a much better person. MAybe there are other women out there who have turned around too. ......Nah, not even gonna chance it. :)
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@JashleyB (1441)
• United States
8 Jan 07
Well said!! :)
@carolynpb (647)
• United States
2 Jan 07
I know what you mean. I have had friends too but none that have stuck with me. They all betrayed me in some form. And they were friends I really would never have thought would do that. I don't have alot of friends now except on the net and even those tend to fizzle out sometimes. But I have my hubby and kids so I really don't have much time for anything else anymore.
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@JashleyB (1441)
• United States
2 Jan 07
I know what yopu mean! Thanks for the response. :)
• United States
2 Jan 07
I have very bad luck with friends, so much that I do not even have one anymore. I have been burned, robbed, and cheated by more so called friends that I just find it safer not to have them at all. There is less heartache involved when I just don't let anyone in anymore.
1 person likes this
@JashleyB (1441)
• United States
2 Jan 07
I can relate! I've prety much done tatmself the past few years. I have a few online friends but tht's about it. I don't get very close with anyone any more.
@shoelover (896)
• Australia
2 Jan 07
I have found that a lot of people don't understand my partner so they keep their distance from him. He is rather frightening sometimes but not to me. The only friends I have kept have known him first so they are not scared of him.
1 person likes this
@JashleyB (1441)
• United States
2 Jan 07
Thanks for the comment!
@Pekachu (1114)
• United States
7 Jan 07
I truely do have the same ever since i was a kid well i was shy so that didnt help when i did get a friend that friend stabbed me in the back seems the trend for me just as you thought i had a good friend to find out it was one sided so for years i have been alone taking care of my special needs son so i use the computer and my pets as companions what can ya do
@sharon613 (2323)
• United States
7 Jan 07
I didn't have many friends growing up, when I became an adult, I got to know more and more friends.
1 person likes this
• India
3 Jan 07
HI, even i had a similar kind of luck in friendship, but if you truly belive in god then dont worry, very soon you will get a person whome you can trust.
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@xXmeganxX (4422)
3 Jan 07
ive had bad luck with keeping friends since i got pregnant, they slowly left me and never came around to see me as much as they did before and also they don't seem to like my partner much, i think that plays a big part in it too!
1 person likes this
• United States
3 Jan 07
I use to think that it was me because i have a hard time keeping friends but,it really is not our fault because alot of our so called friends really are not our friends at all they are either using you or just to get something out of you.well that is what it was in my experience the friends who stand by you are the only friends that you need.i have always had bad luck with keeping friends but the way i look at it they really were not my friend to begin with.
1 person likes this
@mbs730 (2151)
• Canada
3 Jan 07
You are smart to not let it get to you because I have finally seen the light too.. if you have your family and SOME true friends you are lucky! I have had that problem too, I thought there were some who were my friends but turned out to stab me in the back!! And the thing that REALLY had hurt me about that was the fact that my heart of gold bled to the point of it being tarnished! I gave and gave and gave, was stupid, allowed myself to be walked on and then was crapped on!! Oh well, we live and learn I guess because my altruisic side is gone!
2 Jan 07
I have had the same problem with female friends. I have had male friends since middle school and they are the ones who I can always trust to be there for me. The good thing is that they all get along with my husband too.
1 person likes this
• Canada
2 Jan 07
Your not the only one to go through this.I have had friends also that i no longer have.I had an ex bestfriend.We grew up together i have known her for 20 years.She was like a little sister that i never had.She actually slept with my ex bf.She claims she was drunk and didnt know what she was doing.The classic line.She never even told me i had to find out by him.A true friend doesnt do that to you.Especially since she knew all the hard times i went through with him.The confidence the bond we had broke.She oviously didnt respect me.I had alot of fake friends that have used me for rides,money clothes..Now im not naive anymore i don't trust that easy.I have few friends but at least so far i know i can count on them
@besthope44 (12141)
• India
24 Oct 10
Well, sometimes its unavoidable that we feel depressed for the day..but for the health its not a good side, i believe in Meditation which will balance our mind and helps to be normal at situations