How would you response to this?

Philippines
January 9, 2007 11:18pm CST
I had this guy for months now and our way of our communication was through phone call or chat but we've met once. We have so much in common that's why i have falling for him. He was depressed with his past relationship so he feels like not trusting anyone, anymore. Since i have feelings for him, i told what i have for him. I thought it would be the same but its not. His kinda pissed of but i told him that i dnt expect anything in return. Our friendship grew and told me that he wanted to have a baby with me. I was surprised of what he said and i dnt know how to respond to it. But i know in my heart that i still love him but im not yet ready for having a baby. Does he have some feelings for me or not?
4 people like this
65 responses
@lizabeth (666)
• United States
10 Jan 07
If your only communcation with him is through phone or internet and you have only met him once then I would say no I wouldn't be trying to start a family with him. If he couldn't tell you that he cares back then he's not worth it. You should try to get to know him better first and I do mean in person because he may not be want you really think. Just think long and hard about this because a baby deserves two loving parents. I wish you the best.
2 people like this
• Philippines
10 Jan 07
You're right, i told him abt that. And i dnt want to commit mistake when it comes to relationship anymore.
1 person likes this
@kareng (19934)
• United States
10 Jan 07
You need to establish a physical relationship and get to really know this guy before you go planning on having a baby with him?! He sounds a bit crazy if you ask me. Be careful!
@Pekachu (1114)
• United States
10 Jan 07
the guy could have a whole life that you dont know about you dont know him any one can say anything over the phone or on the net he could be trying to get you pregnate in hopes of trapping you mean while he could be married to some one else
1 person likes this
• United States
10 Jan 07
In my opinion, I think he is not being honest with you. If he wants to have a baby with you, why doesn't he get married with you?
2 people like this
• Philippines
10 Jan 07
Well Im not yet prepared for it though. And i want to make sure if he really loves me or not.
1 person likes this
• Netherlands
10 Jan 07
Well if he did love you then he would be discussing marriage or love with you rather than babies. I know you are not ready for babies yet, but think.... He hasn't mentionedhaving a relationship with you, obviously there is something not right with this situation.
2 people like this
@eseomame (1146)
• United States
10 Jan 07
Personally, I would say that you should let him know that you are not ready. It's better you disappoint him than hurt yourself and do something you will regret. You don't even know him so well anyway, he could be totally dishonest.
@miles168 (49)
• Philippines
10 Jan 07
yes he have feelings for you, but you better ask him if he's willing to commit with you.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
12 Jan 07
thank you
@yorb24 (2180)
• United States
10 Jan 07
Well I don't know how much it can work if your only communication is through the phone. Does he live far away? I think you should be honest with him and tell him you are not ready for a baby. If he cares enough about you, he will be okay with it. Good luck. I hope it works out for you.
• Philippines
11 Jan 07
I told him that im not yet ready fora baby, and he agree also. He respects my decision, we are both shy to tell what we feel for each other. But we're trying as much as we can to confess what do we have for each other little by little.
@sawmean (10)
• Nepal
10 Jan 07
In Fact, you r in love with him but not as much as he is with you. if were very very true,you wanted to have a baby. so he is very truth than you. And in the matter of love you should kno yourself very well. it can be just a reaction of age, just some want ...... but love in reality is a combination of two hearts,,, in result discovers a new heart,,,, and that thing is a baby.... i dont kno you will agree with me or not ....but this is only my feeling ........
1 person likes this
• Philippines
10 Jan 07
I think you to be honest to him in your feelings.If he truly loves you not having first a baby to be the solution.You have to be very sure that he love you whatever happens to you.He justwant to talk to someone who will understand him.And having a baby makes you a lots of planning. coolsatire05
@innechen (1321)
• Indonesia
10 Jan 07
i agree with happymyhusband, he is not honest with his own feeling, have u ask why he asked you to have a baby with him? why dont you ask him about his feeling, because i think its strange for a guy who said doesnt have feeling for you but then ask you to have a baby with him without even tell you he likes you.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
10 Jan 07
We're both afraid of what would each one of us would say. Im just confused why he said that he wants a baby from me. Im still getting to know him better now. Ishould take precaution.
@bigbossg (66)
• India
10 Jan 07
when he don't want to marry with you then why you are thinking to have baby with him. it show you are crazy for him. if you want to go him for relation then must have to take precautions, otherwise you will felt sorry.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
10 Jan 07
Im not desperate to have him in my life but i care for him a lot. It doesnt mean that i want a long term relationship with him. Im very much careful now when it come to relationship, im just asking for opinions if that would matched what ihave thought of.. thank you
10 Jan 07
You need to spend more time with him face to face before you could ever make that decision. I met my partner and after only 4 months together we decided to have a baby so it can happen, but you have to be sure its the right thing for you. Your relationship with him has to grow, but that does not mean that in the future you cannot have a baby with him. If you feel it is right then go for it. I did and I have been with my partner now for 18 years. Your heart will tell you what to do and just follow your instincts. But definately spend more time with him, you do not really know someone just by talking over the phone to them. I wish you all the best and hope it works out for you as there are many of us around that have met our true love and known its right, right from the start.
• Philippines
10 Jan 07
i think so, ut the problem is we're too far from each other. Thanks anyway for the advise i hope i would make the right decision for this.
@ilunice (947)
• Netherlands
10 Jan 07
Hey lol, you gata be careful with him. I think he's still much confused and wouldn't want to trust anyone untill he has a proof. Even when the proof comes, he might not be satisfied. I gues true love come unconditionally and without a proof.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
10 Jan 07
I thought of that too. Well i guess i need to get to know him better. thanks
@mansha (6301)
• India
10 Jan 07
Baby?? did I read you right? Why in the heavens name he wants to have a baby when he is not ready for any sort of commitment. Baby is not something you can just have like an icecream cone or something. Its a BIG resonsiblity-what will you tell the child why you had him and never came around to marrying his father. I dont think so that man loves you. If you are not ready than he should respect your wishes and not just use you to paas time. I hve a golden rule, have babies and marry someone who loves you not whom you love, you will be much happier in life.
• Philippines
10 Jan 07
Thank you for that wonderful advise, i really appreciate it. Good day
@fujin1985 (684)
• Philippines
11 Jan 07
i was surprised by him saying he wants a baby with you. as i interpret it to be, he only wants the "S" word but not you. maybe because he was traumatized with the hurts he had before that's why.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
11 Jan 07
Is he serious that he really wanted to have a baby with you..or its just a nice way of saying " Go to bed with me" trying to let you assume that you have a future tohether when you really dont....Im not bitter about guys doing this but...but if you havent really met his family, never been to their house, and your only means of communicating is only through the internet...for me...there's no way of telling that he serious with you..you know me as well have a bad experience with men in the internet...you should watch out! you have to make sure where u truly stand....
1 person likes this
@phon4u (2217)
• Laos
11 Jan 07
Don't trust him if he is not getting married with you soon. He wants you to be sure with him, makes your mind trust him more. You can say what you want to him otherwise you will hold the baby for 9 months and 10 days, after that you have a lot of to do for a child. If he leaves you after your pregnancy, what will you do?I hope not the adoption.
1 person likes this
• United States
11 Jan 07
if i was you i would not be rushing into having a baby especially since you barely know him.it sounds like this guy still has issues with a past relationship so you should not be considering having a baby.he might not even have feelings for you.he might be just playing with you.i would not trust him until you know where you stand with him and what his feelings are for you.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
11 Jan 07
Sweety baby dont give yourself to him try another freinds,if he like a baby,well what next he will want to you,you still not ready for this kind of relationship,For married couple only the relationship with having a baby,He suppose to married you first,before having a baby.Now you met him once only how will you know him personally,Even me Im looki'n to someone else like you to talk to even on my e-mail faustinodioso@yahoo.com is my address,Just a second though,I like also what you like only is freindship,how about business,here in my place you can also visit for business,so you forget him sometimes,we can also talk to my phone,CP 0632-09177512718,He will not have a feeling for that kind of answer you are not ready for having a baby,tell him that you plan so many thing's first then talk to me in my e-mail or talk to me in the phone,she has a fast depression sometimes this kind of person my sweetybabe is not normal.
• India
11 Jan 07
Sure enough..he does have feelings for you..and so do you... And all he is asking is something you might surely go for in near future..I feel its for the good and not the bad and you must go for it.. He wouldn't ask you to mother his child if he didn't love you..
1 person likes this
@cheenlly (3483)
• Philippines
11 Jan 07
Your guy is not yet move on and havent yet let go of his past. Thats why he act like that. He ask you to have a baby with you but not getting married with you. Obviously it mean he is playing safe or he is afraid and not trust you. The pain that he still keep inside haunts him and that affects hes present relationship with you. So you must tell him to let go of it to free himself and start a new life. If he refuse then let go of him and let him realize it by himself. One day if he realize and learn to let go and wanted to start with you then he will come back.
1 person likes this
• China
11 Jan 07
I think maybe it's a fraud.Pls dont angry with me.Coz I meant no harm.You know,network not always so credible.Yes you have met once before.But online love affair is not so true.People on internet dont show another aspect of themselves.Even though two person can meet everyday,they not necessarily understand each other.I hope you can relieve from this online love affair.Granted there are some successful examples about online love.But you konw not everyone is that reliable.You shouldnt believe a stranger.Coz you havent really dealt with each other.I hope my opinion didnt hurt you.Just for your reference.Wish you good luck!
• United States
11 Jan 07
He's not being true to himself nor to you.Both of you need to sit down and talk and get all your feelings out in the open honestly.
1 person likes this
@Mecboy (1051)
• United States
11 Jan 07
I think i know you on some site. Maybe he just kidding about the baby. He knows your acting serious on the relationship or boyfriend girlfriend thing. HEs probably just kidding, he knows you are acting serious Just a joke. But I hope you can have a great time with him HOL.
1 person likes this