Friends at mylot, do you accept people you don't "know"?

United States
February 5, 2007 12:42pm CST
I am new here at mylot, but I wanted to know if people will feel badly if I deny their friendship request? It's not that I don't want friends, but I don't feel comfortable quite yet adding friends who are people that I don't really know yet. Has anyone else had a similar experience? Is it rude to just let pending friends hang out in your accept or deny page without choosing either?
8 people like this
56 responses
@vhansen (2029)
• United States
5 Feb 07
I persoanally except every friend request.I have had some that I sent that are still pending.It doesn't bother me when I'm not automaticaly excepted.I do have to wonder why though.What harm could come from it? It's only a chat site and so far I haven't gotten any spam messages or been otherwise annoyed.And yes it is abit rude to leave people in limbo,so don't take too long to decide.;-)
• United States
5 Feb 07
The last thing I wanted was to leave the requests pending and hurt anyone's feelings. That's why I am glad I asked about this subject. Thank you for your input.
5 Feb 07
I think you are a considerate person from this post alone. You don't need to accept them as friends if you don't feel like it. Use your better judgment in making a decision. I myself don't accept new friends, especially online. I have to know their train of thoughts by their posts. There should be meeting of the minds. As they say, birds of the same feather flock together.
@Geminigirl (1909)
• United States
5 Feb 07
I don't think it is rude. Just use your best judgement, and if you don't want them, then press deny. Or sometimes you can have a friend on your list and find that they do not answer your questions or have similar interests so you can dlete them. It's your game.
1 person likes this
• United States
5 Feb 07
Thanks for the input. See, I assume it is something that I said or wrote that caused these people to want to friend with me, so I can't help but be flattered. But I don't know how many discussions I can keep up with and I don't want to neglect anyone either.
• Italy
5 Feb 07
fantastic...!
• United States
6 Feb 07
Since I don't know anyone here on mylot every friend that I have in my friends list is someone that I have never met. I usually check out the profile of the person who has sent a friend request to me. If we have things in common or they tend to write discussions that I am interested in then I will accept them as a friend. If I am not interested in their discussions or they mostly look like spam I will deny them. I have several pending friends to as I have just not decided which way to go with them. It is all in what you want to do and what makes you comfortable.
• United States
6 Feb 07
Thanks for your input. All these great posts have helped me understand how the friends system works. I like being able to search for discussions started by my friends, too, it really helps to find discussions I care about and want to join in on.
@baweja (197)
• India
6 Feb 07
Well, it is purely an individual's personal choce whether they want a new friend or no, even if yes then you can choose and it is not that you have to accept evreyone as a friend who has requested you. So, it is your judgement after all. I must tell you, it is not rude when you deny anybody's friend request. I myself deny such requests if i am not interested. So, do not keep the friend's request hanging, choose one option.
• United States
6 Feb 07
Thanks for the information, I certainly didn't want to leave anyone hanging. I have learned a lot from this discussion on the topic of making friends here at mylot.
• United States
5 Feb 07
I've only had a couple of non-forumites send me friendship requests, and I went ahead and accepted them. I can always delete them, I guess. That said, I don't think it's rude. It's really your call.
• United States
5 Feb 07
Thanks for your take. I have been familiarizing myself with the ins and outs of mylot, and I guess I can delete them if I desire.
@draconess (651)
• Canada
5 Feb 07
So far the majority of people on my friends list are those I sort of know from another forum. The rest are people who have posted in a discussion I was also involved in, so we share some similar views. If it was just a random person I didn't know, I would leave the request pending until I look into what they have written. Like you, I don't want the AOL/l33t/internet slang types or spammers in my friends list.
1 person likes this
• United States
5 Feb 07
Thanks, I followed your advice and checked out the posts of those people, it turns out most of them use full sentences and punctuation, so we have that much in common! ;)
@WebMann (4732)
• Canada
5 Feb 07
I will accept friends I don't know but first I will look at their discussions to see if they think as I do or are we at opposite ends. If their posts are worth reading I will accept them. If they do me wrong like send me links through private messages without me asking them first they are deleted.
• United States
5 Feb 07
This is what I should do. I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings that might have asked to friend me, but I don't always read posts that are written in netspeak or ar ehard for me to comprehend.
@kenoro (327)
• Netherlands
5 Feb 07
Personally, since I am also quite new to this website, I add people I don't know simply to get to know other and get a community together. Even I sometimes doubt people and therefore I neither accept nor deny, I just leave it pending since even I don't feel good when I neglect a friendship.
1 person likes this
• United States
5 Feb 07
Of course, how can you get to know people on a site like this? Thanks for your input, I didn't want to make people upset by not posting to their discussions.
@apky12 (775)
• United States
5 Feb 07
I accept everyone. I don't "know" anyone on mylot. No one referred me. I found it through a survey site or something. My friends won't join mylot b/c they don't think they have the time to earn the money. It's your choice though. You do what you feel comfortable doing.
• United States
5 Feb 07
Thank you, I appreciate the advice. Now that I have read the posts here, I feel more informed about making the decision to add to my friends.
• India
6 Feb 07
I think it does not do any harm accepting friends we do not know. myLot is a place where we can meet new people and not for interacting with old ones so it really isnt too much of a problem. Infact , I myself add people to my friends list if their interests match with mine and I talk to them and get to know them.
@bulutoy2k (176)
• Philippines
6 Feb 07
I guess its your right if you want to accept them as your friends or not. I dont see any rudeness there. I see myLot as a community of online users around the world. Its aim is to give us new friends from every side of the world. With this feature, I guess to better know the person well adding them is the best solution. We will not only know new ideas from them but also gain new friends as well. Welcome to Mylot my friend.
@iamtulip (13)
• India
6 Feb 07
I joined only yesterday.So far,I have added some people I liked to my friend's list and some have added me.If I like someone and send a friend request then I hope the other person will add me but as I am new I understand if the person takes time before she/he adds me to their friend's list or declines my request.It will make me think but won't discourage me from making new friends :)
1 person likes this
@babs0818 (1191)
• United States
6 Feb 07
I felt that way in the beginning too...now,I read their profile and see if I have anything in common with that person,if so,I most likely add them to my friends list...
1 person likes this
5 Feb 07
i add all friends who request it from me were all strangers after all and if you dont add them how do we ever get to be friends its internetland after all not much chance of actually meeting many of them is there (or is there)? tc keep responding you'll be fine
1 person likes this
• United States
5 Feb 07
I've been accepting everyone. I assume they added me for some reason, and I don't really care who is on my friend list.If they do anything especially bothersome then yeah, I'll almost definitely remove them.
1 person likes this
• United States
5 Feb 07
Everyone I've accepted as a friend is a complete stranger :) I assume they added me because of a post I made at some point and perhaps by adding them we can find further things in common. If not, that's alright too, it just gives me more access to different discussions on here and I'm all for that! No one says the people you add on here as friends need to be made your best man at your wedding or something like that. But ultimately it's up to you and what you feel comfortable doing of course!
1 person likes this
• United States
5 Feb 07
i except people that i dont know. if they help me out i will help them out as well.
1 person likes this
• India
5 Feb 07
Yeah i do use to accept friends in mylot. I donn't know anyone here. to make myself i accept friends here. it also help us in many ways. if you create a new discussion, your friends will come to know about it and they can respond you, which will be very good for you. if you donn't want to accept then leave it. you shouldn't feel guilty of it. i too sometimes deny some members.
@chellicks (904)
• Philippines
6 Feb 07
i am also new here in mylot. but everytime i have a friend request without any hesitation i approve them. for all you know it will be the start of a new friendship.
@moneymind (10520)
• Philippines
6 Feb 07
That is a good one, yeah it could a start for a good friendship. As for me also i just keep on approving or will approved every request that comes to my pending list for friends request. greetings. : )
@chanfrado (1160)
• Portugal
6 Feb 07
I do accept everyone! I wouldn't like to be rejected so I don't reject anyone. I like to make new friends, and accepting everyone is a great way to make friends!