Secret savings, just in case?

I've heard that happening, but I've heard it more for women then men. I'm not sure how I feel. It just seems to me if you do that you are dooming your marriage to failure. It's lying or at least omitting the truth to your spouse, and that always leads to trouble.

This is a not a new story here. I have a friend who is a savings consultant .He says that one in every five or six couples maintain secret accounts. Well, here they have no apprehensions on the survival of the relationships, but the fact is that ,they do not trust each other. That is too tragic and as you have rightly pointed out, no relationship can work if either of them has such an approach in the begining itself. But for reasons not known you have singled out men here. Earning women feels that their husbands do not give enough freedom for them to spend on their favourites and feel that they need to take care of themselves. I know, one of My family friends who would never reveal to her husband about any extra or Bonus payments received by her, since she need to take permission to buy even her toiletories and she can meet her private expenditure from such odd receipts. All these happens when couples have different agendas and demand list.For the majority of us there may be only one single home budget drawn by both. As a couple people need to have trust and also allow teach other to have their own little space, the encroachment of which leads to such disasters.

Maybe since I'm a woman I know of more women who have "secret savings" just in case? But I definitely know a lot of women who have it or had it before they walked away from the marriage. I think it says a lot about our world we live in when you think more about your financial situation and how to come out of a marriage "unscathed" as opposed to spending that money, time and effort on making the marriage better. Perhaps if a few of them would have put that extra hundred they tucked away each month on a great night out once a month and replenish the love they obviously once had... they wouldn't have to wonder where to hid their money? Just a thought! LOL

I am sorry if I am making you upset, but I have to agree on having a secret account. However, the husband must first fulfill his duty and provide financial stability to the family. After he has done so, and he has balance in his bank statement, only then he can have a spare account which he want to save for his personal security. I like a man having this type of planning. It's not that he's not trusting his wife, but just in case. However, I don't think many men are doing this here in my place. What I know is that women tend to have their secret accounts more than men here. As for me, I have my own separate accounts from my husband, but it is not a secret account. My husband knows about me saving money in this account. It's only that he could never touch the money in it. It's totally mine and he's agreed to it.

Personally, I don't see a problem with it. Who knows, that money may even get used to bail the family out in an emergency. I really think both sides should keep some aside.

Most women take care of the budget so if the men have a secret savings it means they're penny pinching their allowances or have an extra earning on the side. Well then, if I were married, I would make sure I also have a secret savings account just to be safe. Nothing wrong with preparing for the worst.

My Ex and I maintainned seperate account but never had a secert one that might explain why she wanted to search for accounts in my name when she left and here i was hoping she would find a few secert swiss bank accounts for me to use. I see that is just trouble waiting to happen but having seperate accounts seems to work for most people i know and they worked out a bill payingmethod but not aware of anyone i know as having a sercet accout. Guess that why it is a secert.