Please tell me it's possible to be happy without children?
February 8, 2007 1:39pm CST
My husband and I are involuntarily childless. Our whole marriage from the start has been about having at least 2 children. But I'v only had 3 miscarriages and one stillbirth. Yes we are on the list for adoption but this doesn't look very good. Yes we are considering adoption of a special needs and older child but this may be years away if at all because we need to go through counselling to do all this, and right now we are still in counselling over losing our baby. We are considering now that we may just be a childless couple. Is it really possible to be happy? What do childless couples do when they are older when they have no family, kids or grandchildren? Is anyone else in these shoes?
2 people like this
• United States
8 Feb 07
I'm sorry to hear about your disappointment at not being able to have your own children. You might consider taking in foster children or joining Big Brothers/Big Sisters. There are lots of kids out there who need good adult role models. Sometimes we make our own plans when the good Lord has something else in mind for us. You and your husband could be a mighty blessing to someone else's child.
10 Feb 07
thanks, yes my husband is looking into Big Brothers and I am looking into fostering a child. It's still so dissapointing because we so much wanted our own biological child. whatever God wants for us, is what we will gladly accept though.
15 Feb 07
Yes. We are. My husband and I don't have children and we have been trying to for 6 years. He doesn't mind not having children because he comes from big family, children are a lot of work, money and responsibility and he is in his 40s now saving for retirement. I want to have kids since I am only 32 and come from small family I am alone most of the time. But if all else fails, I'd have to go childless. It's true that money is not everything, but when it comes to your children primary needs you do need enough savings not to mention responsibility and maturity since we will be their examples. I don't want to act like my husband's niece who is a smoker and had to go through countless arguments just to realize she shouldn't smoke when carrying her baby or smoke in the house with a baby sleeping.
15 Feb 07
I'm quite certain you can be happy without having children of your own, although if I wanted them I'd keep trying. There are so many ways you can volunteer your time to help out children, there are always different charities looking for help. I'm sorry to hear about your situation and hope it improves for you.
• United Kingdom
15 Feb 07
I do not have children and will never have children, but I work with children so I get the best of both worlds because at the end of the day I can hand them back to their parents! I don't get the love but I do love working with children through play and academically. Stranger things have happened but I'm now 35 and I can't see me ever having children. Good luck with adoption and I hope things improve for you.