How to stop him from trying to run your life?

i think u r still associated with him mentally,if u wanna get rid of him then get rid of his memories first.

the next time you transfer or move out from where you are now, NEVER EVER inform your addict hubby or his friends or his kins where you & your daughters intend to live. if they insist to know, just give a different address with different state. the only way you can help him is to ask for police's assistance in order you can send him to a rehabilitation center.

you have to realize that you are a grown woman and the only man who has say-so in your life at this point is your God...I am only 24 and never been anywhere near married, but I know about bad relationships..you deserve so much better than someone who is going to take you through that many years of suffering..you mustve loved him to stay for 12 years (or you wanted your girls to be in a complete family) but if he is in another state, and is locked up, there really shouldnt be anything he can do to control you...he thinks you should help him because you put up with a fair bulk of his crap for all those years and thinks you aren't strong enough to just be done with him..but YOU ARE..raise your girls, live your life, I don't know if he calls you but if he does (he will pull the I wanna talk to my kids line) and you want your girls to talk to him, fine. you don't have to..be strong...pray on it..and don't let someone who has nothing but time on their hands run you down.

I'm glad that you're separated from your husband, Mystic. Now you need to file for a divorce.Also don't accept his phone calls nor read any letters that he sends to you. Because you don't need to hear his voice nor concern yourself with his problems. Actually he didn't love you because he beat you and probably stole money from you and your kids. So just kick him to the curb.

Its really hard to have a husband like that, i can only imagine how you must have felt. But you have separated now, and you are gonna start a new life, a life that you deserve. You deserve to be happy and to realize that you are a special person . No one has the right to put you down much worse to hurt you. Be strong. It may be good to join women club where each member get support from each other.

First off get a restraining order/Order of protection to keep him from contacting you in the future and Second, file for divorce or if your state requires it first make sure you have filed a Legal Seperation and then Divorce. He is back in jail so do it now before he gets out and shows up on your doorstep. Be strong and know others are sending thier best wished and strength to you.

Mystic, at the risk of sounding harsh, I have just one thing to say: WAKE UP AND SMELL THE COFFEE!! No one can control your life unless you allow them to! To blame him is LUDICROUS!!! It is your own fault for allowing this to happen! If he is in jail, let him rot there and go on with your life! File for a divorce and a permenant restraining order! It sounds like you have more than enough cause for obtaining a PRO! The judge will enforce this and then you can move on. If he contacts you after this, he will go back to jail. You have my sympathies, but it's your OWN FAULT! Why is it that women always play this hole card instead of taking personal responsibility for their own actions? You cannot stop him from "trying to control you", but you CAN stop him from "CONTROLLING YOU"! It's simple. Just take my advice and you'll be just fine!

He keeps thinking you'll drop everything for him because you have in the past. File for divorce, don't accept his calls, change your number and ask yourself this: What type of role model am I being for my girls? I'm teaching them that it is ok to stay with someone who is abusive.

Twelve years of this nonsense? Your husband (or should I say Tormentor) has never had any control over you except for the control you gave him. It seems to me that you have allowed him back into you life after every episode of destruction he has engaged in. Resolve to go your own way and not let this monster interfere with your life any longer. He has not learned anything if you have come to his rescue over and over. And yet he treats you like dirt and expects you to save him again. I would think you would want to move to the moon to get rid of this person. Did you deserve this wretched treatment over 12 years? Ignore him completely and he might get the message. Divorce this nut case before he drags you so low you end up in a loony bin.

You need to get help... Now is the time to start over. Make a better life if not for you alone then for your kids- They deserve better. What better time than now when he is in jail. Easier said than done right? I've never been in that situation-- I can imagine it will be one of the hardest things you will do in your life.. But think how happy you and the kids will be when he is out of your life all together. Noone can control you- You are an adult.. There must be somewhere you can turn for help. Women's shelter- State help, etc. Please check it out for you kids sake... Remeber God doesn't give you what you cannot handle. Be strong.

I think you should look for help, the police, the social services, wherever they help you. That man has no right to make your life miserable, and getting in touch with him again could even be dangerous for you and your daughter. I'd personally try to avoid him as much as i could, and report to the police if necessary.

You said you want him to leave you alone, so I guess you don't love him anymore. You now have every reason to officially end the marriage and cut off all communication with him. Remember, he has no power over you and therefore cannot control you. How do your daughters feel? If they still love their father you might have to give them a chance to keep in touch. But that doesn't mean he can control you!

If you are still having problem with him then maybe you did not move on yet. If you were to ignore everything about him, then you'd move on. Get a restraining order from the court, move away from him so he doesen't know where you live. Prevent others from giving him the info about you and your whereabouts. Live by the rule "Far from site, far from the heart." Good luck to you.

waWhat you also need to do is talk to the states attorney and tell them that you are being harrased by you even when he is in jail. they should be able to do something about it.

I to had a bad Marriage for 21 years and my Ex tried to get me to take him back, he used Blackmail and everything, don't let him control you ignore him. Do not reply to him just totally ignore him and do get on with your Life. If he carries on Harassing you then report him. Do not let him do this to you.

I'm not sure what to suggest. If he is a threat then perhaps a restraining order. But apart from that you can only stay strong. Surround yourself with a good support network of family and friends who will help and understand. You have done the hardest bit by breaking away from him. Good luck.

do one thing..if you rally cant live with your husband anymore..leave him... thats the only thing.. or try to change your husband....if he doesnt change ..noonec an do anything....we have to leave thats it dont worry much about this??

hey... i dont knoww.... but .. let me jus knoww.....wats ur qualification?? n which country u r from.... well if u r a well qualified female then u can.... find a job.. in which ever country u wanna...to... or in wat ever country.. ur husband cant come.... n yea... cuming.. on to.. ur childs.. issue.. there r many wounderful skools n colleges.. n you can.... drop her at such internationally reputed skools... n cuming on to da financial issue...if u have da vil n talent.... to do.. things.. then money.. vil b always.. behind u supporting all throughoutt.... well i hope dis would make itt... thanx... 4 da query... n all da bes buddy....n yea... lots of kisses 4 ur small lil baby...bye..

just ignor him hard at first but will get easier eventually

one of the ways to get him to stay away is by getting married again ,having a man in your life would act as a deterrent and make him think twice before he tries to act fresh with you.