Drawback of the written word........
By vega83
@vega83 (6340)
Bahrain
March 7, 2007 5:35am CST
okay, so recently i started some discussions about 'if my friends knew i was a girl' and 'i thought i was getting no responses', and i remember distinctly that when i started these two topics there were no feelings of sadness, anger or disappointment in me, and of course my friends were eager to respond to both these discussions with enthusiasm, and i must say they all contributed great words too, but i was surprised to find that most of them thought i had written those topics because i was p*ssed or angry at them or that i was really upset, and i did also get some apologies although that is not what i was looking for at all.
i realised then that it wasn't their fault but my own, and the fault of the written word, now i'm not some great writer that can accurately describe exactly what she's feeling, so i think i fell short on that, maybe it was my use of exclamation marks or my poor choice of words, it could've been anything, but my feelings didn't come across as i had intended, those feelings were of course of curiosity and wonderment, but they could easily be mistaken for accusatory .
This made me realize what a disadvantage the written word has over the spoken word. I mean tone, body language, context, manner is so important when we talk. When we write these feelings however, everything comes down to punctuation, our ample use of capitals, and our distinct choice of words. One thing goes wrong, and a question can seem like an interrogation, a statement can sound like an accusation, and a comment can sound like an insult, and don't get me started on a joke, cuz a joke can completely be thrown out of proportion.
Do you feel the same? Do you feel that stuff you write does not really bring out your feelings as you thought it would? Do you feel that a message you sent or a letter you wrote was not taken in the meaning that you had in mind?
Well, if you do, it's not your fault, it's just the drawback of the written word.
I have so many times realized that the meaning of the written word does not depend on the writer but on the reader, how the reader reads in and how he perceives it. Words can just be gibberish or have a divine deep meaning depending on who's reading it.
I think in this respect, words are just like art, like a painting that you don't understand but interpret through feelings.
So what do you have to say about this matter? Do you feel i was successful in bringing out the message that i wanted to in this topic, or did i fail again to the strategy of the written word?
2 people like this
2 responses
@shogunly (1397)
• Libya
7 Mar 07
You are right (no pun ) .It is an art to write something that exactly reflects what you mean ,especially when it comes to complex ideas or feelings .Obviously expressing simple things is easy , like lol . But when commiting to words a particular chain of thoughts , the emotional background in which the words were written can be easily misinterpreted . For example , people often wonder about the intention or assume there is an objective behind everything you write ,while you might only be writing to share a thought . I must say I learned a lot from the exchanges and discussions here on MyLot and I am gradually gaining confidence in my "literary" abilities as I learn from my mistakes and equivocal statements ,and pick up new writing and expressive strategies and phrases .
Good post .
You still havent replied to my message regarding how did you end up in Bahrain ? Maybe it's too private to share on MyLot ?
1 person likes this
@vega83 (6340)
• Bahrain
7 Mar 07
well that is true, i too have improved and learnt a lot since i joined my lot. Thanks for the good post compliment, but i won't take all the credit for this because the idea sparked after i had a small conversation with nowment, who's one of my friends, right here in my lot, in the last topic i started.
Well i was born in bahrain, that's why i couldn't tell you how i ended up here, cuz there is no question of ending up.
@vega83 (6340)
• Bahrain
7 Mar 07
well i'm not originally arab, i'm actually from pakistan, but i've never been there, i've been born and brought up here, thanks for the compliment, but i've met many arab girls who also speak very good english, for me it's all thanks to tv, that's the best teacher.
@greengal (4286)
• United States
7 Mar 07
You've always been good with words vega, the key thing is perception. I perfectly understood what you meant on your other two discussions, that's because I perceived it the same way you did. I strongly beleive actions speak louder than words, so I don't agree when you say the written word can mean more. Probably the way it is expressed or implied can make a difference. These kind of misinterpretaions happen all the time in day to day life because the people whom we interact with aren't always on the same wavelength as us. We intend one thing and they understand it as someting else. The only solution is to think before we speak and choose our words to suit the audience. But it's not always possible to do that here on myLot since the perception abilites are diverse. We need to accept it in our stride and move on. So don't worry about not being able to get through to the masses.
1 person likes this
@vega83 (6340)
• Bahrain
8 Mar 07
Those are good words, and i don't really worry that much anyway, i'm not a worrier, you see, but it still makes me think maybe it was my use of those exclamation marks instead of question marks made it sound more like a accusatory statement than an innocent question. Makes you wonder, how a small thing like that can completely turn the whole topic around.
