Do you spend a lot time away from your spouse or significant other?

United States
March 14, 2007 9:20pm CST
My husband and I don't like being away from each other for long periods of time. He doesn't like it when I'm gone for too many hours, and I don't like it when he's gone for a long time. We do have our own things to do, I go shopping or get my nails done with my daughter, He has gone to concerts, hockey games, football games, and other guy things without me. We really miss each other when we're away from each other, we even call each other all the time. We've been married 9 years, so I think it's a good sign that we enjoy being with each other. We do have our not so nice moments , but I guess that's healthy too. Do you spend a lot of time away from your spouse or significant other?
5 people like this
17 responses
• United States
15 Mar 07
Well from reading what you have posted and the responses you have received so far, my marriage is worse off that what I thought we are lucky if we spend 10 minutes together every day. He is always downstairs in his den watching tv or playing the xbox and I am always upstairs working, cleaning, reading, on the computer doing whatever to entertain myself. We have only been married 4 years. Of course I will have to admit I am not happy with him he is in his 40's and has never worked, he is lazy does nothing around the house, sits on his behind all day watching tv and playing games, he will occassionally leave and go to friends, and of course if his mother calls he drops everything and runs out the door. Long story so never mind. But congrates to you all, I would love to find a nice caring, loving, working man, but I seem to always attract the opposite.
• United States
15 Mar 07
I'm sorry to hear that. That was like my selfish first husband, he never had time for me or our children, if he wasn't hunting or fishing, he was preparing to go hunting or fishing, or he was in his garden, or off with friends, and like yours, if his Mother called (or one of his 4 brothers, or a friend, for that matter), he jumped, and did anything she told him. About the only time we were together as a family (and of course we had to act like the happy couple, that we weren't) was on holidays or birthdays, which were ALWAYS spent with her, at the time she chose and the place she chose...I like my mother-in-law now, but I didn't like her ruling our lives, or should I say, him letting her. You'll be in my thoughts.
@Willowlady (10658)
• United States
15 Mar 07
We have been married 23 years and when I go on vacation I don't mind it at all. He functions just fine also. We do what we do and try to enjoy any time we do happen to be in the same spot at the same time. my vacation is 1 week long. Sometimes I am not ready to come home. I think he is relieved once I am home again.
2 people like this
@meljessxena (2315)
• Australia
15 Mar 07
i am usually always with my partner. we might have a few apart soon because he is going working away probably only a week or 2.. but i live about 300 ks from my parents as well, so we are back and forth to there.
2 people like this
@maddysmommy (16230)
• United States
15 Mar 07
The only time we spend time away from each other is when he is working during the day/week, when I go to the gym or go off for a walk, when he plays golf or goes to a NBA game and if he has to travel for work. Most of the time we do things together with our 4 year old son. My husband doesn't like being away from us for a long period of time (especially when he travels for work). I on the other hand, like it sometimes - I get to have some "quiet time or alone time" and instead of taking care of two people, I only have to take care of my son. Either way we still keep in touch via phone, emails and msn messenger.
2 people like this
• Philippines
15 Mar 07
Absence makes the heart go fonder. i really miss my wife. the nature of my work is really so far away from home, we have a long distance communication. In today's technology we got landlines,mobilephones,texting,3G,email,cam,VOIP.. etc. I do spend a lot of time away from my spouse but we never stop our communication. cause' lack of communication is the the end of any relationship. Your lucky, your always with your spouse. Hope i can afford that in the future so i can really enjoy quality time.
@sd03bc06 (15)
• United States
15 Mar 07
My husband and I are the same way. Since we have known each other (8 years)there has only been one day that we didnt at least see each other. Since we have been married we do as much as possible with eachother. All of our friends think we are weird because we do as much as possible with each other. We even talk on his way to work and at all of his breaks.
@lingli_78 (12822)
• Australia
15 Mar 07
me and my hubby both are working... so, we only get to meet each other at night after we both finish work... yes, we do miss each other terribly when we are at work... but there is nothing we can do about it as both of us need to earn money... but on sunday or our off days, we usually try to make full use of it to spend quality time together... this is to make up for our lost times during weekdays when we are working...
1 person likes this
• United States
15 Mar 07
My husband and I have been married for 26 years and yes there have been times in our life, raising the boys that it has been necessary to work opposite shifts so that one of us would be home to tend the family. Often that left us feeling like ships passing in the night. We both felt that day care was out of the question. Now I stay at home and take care of the grand children so that my kids do not have to worry with day care. I do work some for a friend that has a computer shop but when I do my grand babies goes with me. My husband and I are finally taking the time to do things together that we missed so much of in the early years. But here is the thing, I would not want anyone to think that it was easy and not hard on our marriage. It most certainly was, there were times I thought we were at a breaking point. But both of us hung in there, we love each other and every family has to muddle through the hard times the best they can. It does get better!
@mommyaiai (295)
• United States
15 Mar 07
My husband and i don't like away from each other for long periods of time either.Even when he work overtime he will call me coz he missed me and i miss him too and after work he will come home right away.Sometimes when i go shopping with my friends he will call me if i gone for a couple of hours and ask me when am i going home.We have also some arguments sometimes but i think that is normal for a couple.
1 person likes this
@dfinster (3528)
• United States
15 Mar 07
My husband and I spend quite a bit of time apart. He's home everynight, but he's a total workaholic. He's actually lke "uncomfortable" if he's not doing some kind of work. He can't take even 1 day to just relax and hang out. He's gotta be puttering around the garage or the yard. I guess it doesn't bother me because he's not out in a bar or a club or anything like that. I see that's the way almost everyone of his brothers and sisters are too.
1 person likes this
15 Mar 07
Me and my boyfriend spend quiet alot of time appart...we dont like together, we live with our parents. we see each other every sunday...and recently we have been seeing each other every other tuesday and friday too vicky
1 person likes this
@seamonkey (1976)
• Ireland
15 Mar 07
We used to work nearly opposite hours until our 2nd child was born. After that the time we spent together increased. Now that the children are bigger I like taking them away on holiday without my SO. If he were around it would be less of a holiday and more of bringing home with us.
1 person likes this
• India
15 Mar 07
i love both of u for having somuch love between u..belive me u guys are lucky..not all coples are so much happy..its ok to seperate fr sometime..that will increase the love between u..dont worry..u both wont forget each other if u are far afar..love is all that keeps u on earth..good luck...
1 person likes this
@Erilyn (3020)
• United States
15 Mar 07
I think it is good you spend a lot of time together. My fiance and I spend all our time together. I get him up in the morning for work, make coffe make sure he has everything for the day, we IM back and forth to each other while he is at work and I greet him at the door when he gets home. You don't generally see one of us without the other we are joined at the hip lol. Completely different from my ex husband. He spent most of his time on his computer, and eventually cheated on me. I realized that I really didn't know him at all even after 3 years. I know more about my fiance now being together a year and a half then I have ever known anyone else. We also have our good times and bad times just like another couple, but we also know how to talk to each other more then most couples I know. I cherish ever moment i spend with my honey, and wouldn't change a thing.
@webeishere (36313)
• United States
15 Mar 07
My wife is a workaholic actually. Since the late 70's she has worked 6 days a week 12 hours a day. When she gets home she snacks bathes then goes to bed. She did work 7 days a week but I finally talked her into taking that off after a few years of pleading. I only recall one family vacation we took with the kids. So we're apart almost all day. I see her when she wakes up for an hour or so. Then an hour or so when she gets home. Saturdays she works a half day & thats the day we do a lot of shopping together as she doesnt drive. Sundays is our only day together. And thats usually spent with the dauighter & grandsons. Or once in a blue moon we go out to dinner or a movie or maybe an auction. We also tend to differ a lot about many things as we aren't close to each other as most couples are or should be. We both call each other a few times during the day also. Thanks for sharing this with us all. HAPPY POSTINGS FROM GRANDPA BOB.
@Bee1955 (3882)
• United States
15 Mar 07
Together and comfortable - couple
Its healthy to have some time off together, but like you and your spouse, neither of us likes the other to be gone too long. When I used to do lecture tours and have to be away for a few days, we'd talk on the phone every night before bed and hate to hang up! Even when home, if either of us go out with friends alone, the other is uncomfortable after a few hours. This is nice to have after 10 years of being tohether and I hope it continues!
1 person likes this
@mobyfriend (1017)
• Netherlands
15 Mar 07
Due to the fact that we have a special needs child my hub and I spent a lot of time together since your social life goes down the drain. Most of our time goes to our kids. In fact in the past five years we went out together only twice. So we need to spend time apart from each other to meet friends or go on short holidays with friends. And we know that things will improve once our kids have found their special place in this world. I think (imho) that the connection you have with your hub has nothing to do with the time you spend together. Just as long as that time is quality time.
1 person likes this