Fair Warning #2

Why on earth would you want to deny anyone? Has anyone harmed you by being on your friend list? I don't see how they could possibly be detrimental to you. And, as for the 100 post requirement you have set up, that is kind of useless, because some people have 500 posts and they are totally worthless jibberish.

Well I don't think that you are unfair or unkind as to choose a friend in myLot you have decided your criteria . But the better criteria could have been if you have gone through their profiles and seen their interests and if they match as that of yours.Another criteria could have been to see some of their discussions and responses, how do they write instead of just relying on the myLot rating. Anyways it is your personal choice and one is always free to choose his/her friends. I hope you get best of friends by your selection criteria.

I don't think you are being unfair or unkind. I sometimes deny friend requests too. I would rather accept a friend with 5 quality posts than one who has 100 junk posts though. Just because they have a certain number of posts, it does not mean they will make a good friend. Look at quality over quantity. When I consider accepting a friend I look at the types of discussions they start and answer. If we have common ideas and I would be interested in taking part in their discussions, I accept them.

You are not unfair or unkind. You have to do what is best for you. I deny many friends too. If they do not speak English well enough to converse with me, have similar interests, or don't reply to my posts, I deny them. Am I mean or unkind? Dear, it is up to you want and who you want as a friend. I have given you another + for a fine posting. Keep it up.

Same here with me. I apologize to all the invitations that I just denied. I don't want my list of friends to get crowded. I also don't want to get in touch with friends that I don't know that well especially if we don't have same interest.

Well it is your friends list, therefore you can do what you want with it. But even if someone is new to mylot and they are not yet at 100 post they could be a very good person with great intelligence. I have never looked at a persons rating in order to decide if I want them to be my friend or not. I don't care if they don't post a lot, or don't respond to my postings a lot. If I want a person to be on my friends list it is either because I already know this person as my friend in real life or because I would like to get to know this person more as a friend. But that is just my look on it, and as I said, it is your friends list you can do what you want with it. Thanks for sharing. God Bless

No, I do not think you have been unfair or unkind. I do exactly the same thing and have done for quite a while now. Another thing i do is check out the discussions they have started and responded to. They have to have some interests in common with me or at least have entered one of my discussions or at least posted something i would like to respond to. Am i being meen?

I think you're taking friend lists too seriously. Someone asking to be your friend isn't that big of a deal. Why would you have "specifications" for your friend list? Seems a bit pompous.

I totally agree with you I have had alot of friends requests who don't even have a profile yet, it is like they just hop on line and find my name and want to add me with very little posts.I did fall prey to a couple of these and got some nasty messages so deleted them right away after sending them a nice thank you for the trash mail message.You are being very fair I think for none of us are here to get abused by new people abusing the message and friend center. I agree with you totally for doing this.

That is the most fairest decision that everyone of us here should also do, because we are doing our very best here to to keep this site in good harmony. Atleast you've given them your stand on what you look for friends here, I see others here use most of us to promote their other get-rich-quick schemes which I think most of them are bogus! You did very good pointing your view on this matter, my thoughts are the same as your!;)

it is un fair but I understand how you feel. some people join just because they want to see what it is all about here and after about 5 post they never get heard from again. but I at least try to give everyone a chance to be on my friends list it is only fair to them just as it was to me when I joined and I love all my friends here I get alot of support from alot of them. please rethink how you feel about this it might make some feel that if they join they may not get any friends and not stay then.

I think it's really wise to have set that requirement. If they have 100 posts you'll have plenty of material to look at to see what types of discussion they start, the quality of their responses, and how they treat their friends. Also by then they'll probably have had time to add things on their profile and you'll get a good idea of their interests and other websites they use. I have friends with under 100 (or at least did when I accepted them) and so far only one turned out to be a spammer. I've deleted a few because they re maned inactive and I assumed they just tried it for a day or two and left. I like adding friends so I always have a quality list of discussions available if I'm struggling to find anything on the main pages. If I don't know what type of discussions a person starts or if all they start are "fluffy" then there's no point in adding them. When it comes to friends I'm about quality over quantity. I haven't set a specific number they have to reach but they do need to have proved themselves.

I really don't see what it matters if you approve someone for a friend or not. I don't see what it helps and I don't see what it hurts, yet so many people get all tied in knots about it.......I don't get it? Just approve everyone. It doesn't hurt anything.

It's a little hard to get 100 posts...if you don't have someone to post to...or someone commenting on your posts. Sorry you feel this way. There are some of us out there that are nice people, just new to the website.

ya know its your choice to whether you want to accept them or not,its your right. i get request all the time and alot of people just request to promote other websites or whatever else.Some barely post here,so i feel you on that note.Have great day hun!

I think you have a right to do whatever you want. LOL I'm glad you're on my friends list. But when i get friend requests i look and see if i recognize the name as any discussions i might have posted to, or if they've posted to any of my discussions. I know a lot of people just try to add to their friends the people that are in the top discussions of the day, and i don't agree with that. I usually have friends that I enjoy their discussions, and want to answer. Not ones i feel obligated to answer. It's hard starting off at the beginning of mylot, but at the same time i think it weeds out who will stay and who goes, and that affects your friends list.

I've gone through my list and deleted a few people lately. I don't have as much time lately so being able to hit the link my friend's discussions and actually get OK discussions is important to me. I deleted people who were only posting jokes. People who I approved when they were newe but changed how they are posting and it is all jokes--I have enough to do that I don't want to go through 3 pages of jokes on my friends discussions list. So I think it is fair to do what you are doing. I think it is something I will consider doing. I use my friend's list to my advantage--to find the discussions I like and certain people whose posts I love to read. I don't have to be in that group that has thousands and thousands of friends.

well if thats your criteria to have a friend here..then fair enough if thats what you think...can t debate you on that but however i dont have any criterion to follow in accepting friends here..all are welcome...it dont bother me if they have lesser points made...

It is your right to chose who becomes your friends, I (like many members on MyLot) accepted everyone when I just started, now it is time to discriminate and only accept members who start decent discussions or reply reasonably to my own discussions. With over 83,000 members it is impossible to accept every single person as a friend. There is also the fact that you can set up MyLot to send you e-mail alerts whenever some or all of your friends post a new discussion, that could lead to a lot of e-mails every single day, and even spending time looking at these e-mails could deprive you of some time to spend working on MyLot. I don't accept everyone, and its your choice - You set the criteria for what's best for you, and you can refine that choice whenever you want to. One other option is to allow some of them to become friends, but don't switch on the e-mail alert until they have proved themselves, it also means that they may read some of your own discussions that they may not have seen any other way than getting an e-mail about your discussions.

This is all new to me so I'm not sure why anyone would want to deny anyone friendship. However, I respect your honesty.