fighting siblings
By troopy
@troopy (168)
Australia
April 27, 2007 7:31pm CST
I havent spoken to my older brother for over a year because of his wife, she is a alcholic, who smokes marijuana all day while he is at work supporting their 4 children, three off which she had b4 they meet. Her pathetic ex doesnt help support the children and she spends all her lone parent money on the drugs and alchol.. The other night I ran into them in a local hotel, ended up havin words with her and fighting with him.. I can honestly say its not me as she has caused trouble with my sisters as well, and as a result they have nothing to do with them either.. Our family was and has alway's been very close till she came along.
1 person likes this
4 responses
@Gemmygirl1 (2867)
• Australia
28 Apr 07
My BIL has a girlfriend similar only they have 4 kids (3 are my BIL's) yet the girlfriend sits at home & continues to make babies coz she doesn't want to work again & for every baby she has, the government hands over $4000.
On top of that, the girlfriend is roughting the system by not declaring his earnings. Her constant pregnancies are causing problems between my partner's family because they have given no consideration to the children - she is also very manipulative (we all see it but he doesn't).
It's hard when you cant see a family member because of the way their partner is, i hope one day your brother will come to his senses & realise he should have been listening to his family & that his family need to be a part of his life & not be pushed out of it because of a trouble making spouse.
@troopy (168)
• Australia
28 Apr 07
Thanx, is so tru that we can all see it and they either dont or choose to ignore it. I cant see them staying together for the rest of their lifes, but I know my bro will stay with her while the children are dependant on him. Which is still going to be a while yet.
@biznizman01 (581)
• Philippines
28 Apr 07
that is so sad. this kind of trouble happens with siblings when you are fighting with their chosen partner in life. its often that not that the sibling will side with the spouse no matter how obvious the mistake may be with the people around them.
time and time again that i found in this forum or in any discussion with couples that the person should always side with the spouse when he/she has disagreement with the mother-in-law as a rule, right or wrong. in your case your brother's wife has an argument with you and your sister. i think the rule applies to siblins as well. the only time a person come to his/her senses was when he/she is already separated with the erring partner.
i think you could try and talk to your brother in a calm and rational manner. try to soften the way you approach him. a gentle and non-combative stance may work. a kind word that is tactfully relay to him may make him think about what was happening in his life.
@psyche49f (2502)
• Philippines
28 Apr 07
That's really bad you have her for a sis-in-law. . I'd also do the same if I were in your shoes. . .It seems that your brother is really stuck with her. . and is in-love in spite of her faults. . that means you can't really do much, except perhaps be civil to your brother, but that I think is not possible because of his wife, who is now part of your family. He has been estranged from you because of "the" wife. Wait till something happens before your martyr brother finally comes to his senses. You have a life to live, your brother also has his own life to manage. . just wait for that day when he comes knocking at your door for help. . .
