What would u do?

@lenapoo (674)
United States
May 5, 2007 9:09pm CST
Well tonight I am going to a party for my husbands first cousin. Well he is getting dressed now and I am getting ready to put my clothes and stuff on when he comes out of the bathroom. Well the toddlers are okay as long as they got something to eat and something good to watch on tv. My stepdaughter decides that she has an attitude. Me I wasn't thinking like she is mad because we are going out and she isn't going with us. So I said what is wrong with u. She was like You could have told us that you were going somewhere. I said no I don't. She was like it isn't fair that you are going somewhere and we can't go. I said yes it is. You all did something earlier today and it is getting close to your bedtime. She just rolled her eyes and was looking at me like yeah whatever. Tell me what you would do or what you think. I mean this is the first time that we are going out minus the kids in about six months. I know that kids are jealous and sometimes think that it isn't fair when they can't do certain things. I mean if I could I probably would take them to the party, but it is an adult party only. There will be numerous activities going on that are not suitable for children. What should I say to her to let her know that it is not that we don't want to be with her tonight it is just that we hardly ever get a chance to go out and have time alone. We have been looking forward to this. I don't want to do the wrong thing, but I just want to be able to reassure her that it is not because we don't love her or want to spend time with her it is just that parents want to have fun too. Please help me here and tell me what I should do.
1 person likes this
2 responses
@Gemmygirl1 (2870)
• Australia
6 May 07
You didn't say how old she is, it might help to work out what to say :) I guess you just need to be honest with her, tell it's been 6 months since you've been out with your husband - just the 2 of them & that you would appreciate it is she didn't get an attitude with you because of 1 thing she's not allowed to do. I guess it also depends on if she's the one who has to take care of the little ones (another reason an age would have been helpful) - i used to hate it when my parents went out & left me to take care of my siblings, more so coz they didn't ask me to do it, they just expected me to. It could also be a jealousy thing with you spending time with your hubby - being she's not your daughter - i guess she might feel a little let down by her Dad, maybe he needs to be the one to explain it to her. I'm sure if i had a stepmother i'd be a little less likely to listen to what she had to say. That's just me though, i guess all kids are different with things like that, it would also depend on how long you've been her stepmother for too. I wish you well & recommend you get your hubby to chat with her coz i'm sure she'd listen to him a little better than she does to you!
@lenapoo (674)
• United States
6 May 07
Well she is eight and she is very mouthy. My husband tends to leave things like that up to me and she doesn't listen to me as well because I am not her mother. I have been her stepmother for 41/2 years. I just didn't worry about it too much. It seems as though all of a sudden she gets attitudes when she can't be included in something no matter what it is.
@deebomb (15322)
• United States
6 May 07
Married couples need to get away alone regularly to keep the spark alive. You need to explain thie to the young lay that you love her but ther are times you need to get away alone and her time will come to be with her friends. SAsk her if she wants you, your husband and the toddlers to go with her to her freinds hose for those sleepovers or something like that. That should give her something to think about. I would also say drop the stepdughter business.