coping with failure

@acmepride (1546)
United States
May 8, 2007 3:52pm CST
You've studied very hard for your finals. You even spent your weeks from coffee house to coffee house just to make sure that the atmosphere is truly conducive for learning. You've tried reading, understanding, and memorizing every book, article, note that you've collated throughout the semester. Heck, you've even resorted to yoga (or other deep breathing techniques), relaxing music, healthy food (the so called, "brain food" even) just to make sure that you're mind and body is totally conditioned for your upcoming exams. Judgment day came. You went inside your room. The exams were distributed. You read the questions. Darn! Nothing could be as hard! Moment of panic. Temporary despair crept in. But then, you started thinking, believing, hoping, and unrelentingly answering the exam questions with every ounce of power you have. The bell rang. The exam is over. A sigh of relief. Then, your grades came out. It's depressingly abysmal to say the least. How do you deal with your own failure? What will you do if you've done everything in your power to achieve your goal but it's all for naught? How do you stop the nagging feeling of failing and being a failure? Kindly share your thoughts. Thanks in advance.
3 people like this
12 responses
@LittleMel (8742)
• Canada
28 May 09
I try to talk about it. the more I talk about it the lesser I feel disappointed. the hardest part is not to blame myself, because I've tried so hard why I still failed? other than that I used to keep myself busy or make notes for the future in case I have to go through the same exam or something like that.
2 people like this
@sharksfin (1091)
• Philippines
27 May 09
Firstly, failure is just for a day. Tomorrow is a different day and you just gotta go on. If you think you're a failure after one event, then, it will affect you more and you'd fail over and over and over. So, leave what was yesterday and work on what is to come. Secondly, if you know that you have done your best, that's already enough. YOu can't base your success from what others. Base it on your own. Always compete with only yourself. If you failed the test, make better with the next. Making sure that your score is much higher even if you have to fail the next tests after the last one. Thirdly, wallow on your emotions only for an hour or two. Cry if you have to. But, after that, move on. Detach. This is something we all need to learn as this is not easy to do, but is very important that we do so we can cope easily with failure.
• India
19 Jun 09
Failure Success is not in the Hands of Humans, to say the least......... I Beleieve in Giving my Best in anything i do and not worrying about the end result. If the end result is Failure learn to accept it. Even with Success be in the Same State of acceptance.................. This Way you will not Regret as You Tried Your Best And Your Conscious Knows You Could do no better ....... I May Sound Phylosophical But Thats the Way it is........................ Thank You ..
1 person likes this
@rb200406 (1824)
• India
5 Jun 09
it is easy said than done but failure have to be accepted .I know it is difficult but sometimes however hard u work succes doesn't come but one has to continue to work towards it.
1 person likes this
@thedaddym (1731)
• United States
4 Jun 09
I agree with what lady said. We can not all be good at everything. I got mostly all A's in college, but there was one subject that I just could not do well in no matter how hard I tried. I just did not get it. It frustrated me because I knew it would harm my over all GPA, but in the end it really did not matter that much. It was not something I was interested in and not something I was majoring in or would do as a job, I didn't like the subject and it did not like me. There were plenty of other subjects I did well in.
1 person likes this
@jonesy123 (3948)
• United States
23 May 09
Been there, done that. It's hard to deal with at first but after a couple of days/weeks you learn to cope and move on. Hopefully one gets a second chance at the exam, or one has to live with the failure. If I studied hard and did all I could do, then that's just it, I reached the limits of what I can do. And maybe it's for the better that I failed. Failure usually led me on a path better suited for me and more successful than the one first chosen by me.
2 people like this
@cassidy22 (2974)
• United States
4 Jun 09
It's hard to get a bad grade on an exam. But you need to change your focus. Your focus should not be about the GRADE, or the exam. It should be about learning. memorizing, yoga (though not a bad thing to do), and seeking out coffee houses doens't impact what you have learned. The point of going to school is to LEARN so you can apply things. Cramming at the last minute, hoping that brain food and relaxation are going to help your head remember things is not the way to go. You need to spend the entire semester applying what is being taught and learning it. If you truly understand your class, you'll walk into the exam more relaxed, you won't panic because the questions won't seem hard, they'll be comfortable for you.
1 person likes this
@ladym33 (10979)
• United States
4 Jun 09
As human beings we are all different. We all have subjects we are good at and subjects we are not good at. While you may not do well in that subject there are probably plenty of other things you are good. We can not all be good at anything. When I was in college I did pretty good in most of my subjects but accounting was just a disaster for me. The homework was crazy, I grasped some each chapter but not all of each chapter, and it always seemed like the teacher would test on the part I did not grasp. I made it through the class by the skin of my teeth. I realized I was not good at accounting, I was never going to be an accountant so who cares. I passed not a great grade, but I got through it, and would never have to re-visit that subject again. Just let it go, that one test does not define you.
1 person likes this
@rymebristol (1808)
• Philippines
27 May 09
failure is a way towards life. it's always behind our back. if we are afraid to accept failure as a fact then it'll be hard for us to keep on going to try harder. that's what i learned from all my failures in life, i am still a failure, i haven't done anything big as of the moment, but i never say quit, i don't want to give up..not now, not forever. i may fall down several times but i am not as weak as everyone may think. i take all those failure as an experience to learn something the hard way. now whatever failure i still have to deal with in the future, i am confident that i'll be able defy it with no effort at all.
@EliteUser (3964)
• Australia
30 Sep 09
Hey, Yea I have failed my exams many times, but I don't really care. I have sometimes even studied for a few tests, and still failed the test. I think that you should never look at your past failures, just try and head for the best. Make sure you have a good day, God bless and Happy Lotting!!
@1gidget (152)
• United States
28 May 09
To me, every day is a new day. Why bother dwelling on failures/mistakes/bad times. Also, I think, setting attainable goals is important.
1 person likes this
@Shavkat (137215)
• Philippines
28 Jul 12
A success can be attained from our failures in life. We really need to work so hard for this success. Failure is a word to ponder as a learning process.