We are in the middle of a family feud. Might miss grandpas funeral.

United States
May 18, 2007 10:02pm CST
My grandpa is old and on his last days. In his younger years he was not the greatest father or person. He had a drug addiction to pain killers from an auto/ motorcycle accident when he was a police. I was to young to know him before the accident, but I dont think that gives me the right to hold a grudge. That being said, He was put in home some time ago and my Husband and I moved away. I didnt see my grandfather for years and now we are back. He is going to die and my aunt who has taken over his life is telling us that we will not be notified when he dies because we were not involved in his life. I did go see him with my kids a bit ago but I didnt think I needed to tell everyone, so I didnt. Is it right that she not tell us when he dies? Should I go to his hme and tell them to let me know? How do I handle this with out damaging more family ties?
1 response
• United States
19 May 07
I would simply talk to nursing home staff. Tell them that you are his granddaughter and that you would like to know when he passes on. There is no reason for them not to tell you (there is no reason for your aunt not to tell you either but she is being spiteful it would seem). That would be my suggestion. You could also talk to your grandfather and tell him that you would like to know so maybe he could tell the staff to make sure you get that call.
• United States
19 May 07
I think that is what I will do. My aunt is probibly just trying to make us all feel bad for not seeing him. I dont think it is her place to tell us what choice to make. I wasnt there when they were growing up, I will not judge thoes who want to seperate them selves from their abusive past. Thank you for your support.
• Canada
20 May 07
I think that sometimes people in families can be meanest to the ones they are supposed to love. My family is like this. Your aunt is being mean to you and you should not let her hateful ways keep you out of receiving news that you are entitled to. We all do the best we can and should not be judged according to some mean person's skewed standards.
• United States
21 May 07
I agree. Thank you. We are trying to be the bigger person in this. By we I mean my husband and I and our kids.