Is APPEARANCE Important?

Saint Vincent And The Grenadines
June 17, 2007 4:36am CST
We always hear that what matters is on the inside of a person, and i agree, but i also believe that if we're honest to ourselves, we all care about how a person looks, even if it is minimally. What differs from person to person is how much they worry about them. Some practically only pay attention to the looks, whereas others look more into the personality etc. Do you think appearance is important? Do you always pay attention about how a person looks?
8 people like this
41 responses
@add_im (2712)
• Philippines
17 Jun 07
Honestly for me Light, physical appearances in one's person truly doesn't matter at all...that's for sure honestly speaking from my heart. Luckily to those people who have everything, the beauty, the good looks and the good personalities they're indeed giving so much applause to many and appreciation, but I must consider also to those people who's just average when it comes to looks and appearances...I would still give them equal treatment and genuine respect like everybody elses as a person they are, no matter how they look. :-)
• Saint Vincent And The Grenadines
17 Jun 07
I wasn't saying i would treat them differently...but anyway i see what you're trying to say...And if you really don't care at all about looks it's good for you, so congratulations honey.
1 person likes this
@add_im (2712)
• Philippines
17 Jun 07
why you congratulate me? for what Light? :-)
• Saint Vincent And The Grenadines
17 Jun 07
for having such point of view.
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@kamran12 (5555)
• Pakistan
17 Jun 07
Another interesting discussion, LightninStrike! I’ll present my theory and some examples which I have already shared somewhere. I think you will soon issue me a notice to shorten my replies:-). Please bear with me through this long post. Our characterization of somebody is usually subjective and depends on our own definition of standard behavior/conduct and our own understanding of outer world. by looks one can never judge the personality for my experience has revealed some bad looking people to be the most humane and some nice looking people to be one of the meanest. generally speaking professional, personal and social parts of life have their own proper decorum and if we havn't seen a person in all these spheres, we can't have a true picture of his personality. so our view of someone is dependant on, in which sphere of life and condition we interacted with a specific person. I think that criteria of judgment should be how well a person does objectively, in his capacity, when faced with certain issue whether it's personal, professional or social sphere of life. I had a professor in my university teaching production engineering. more than 95% of students feared him and thought of him a sort of scary personality. They thought that he will damage their grades as told by senior students. he was a very silent and serious type of personality, using very few words even in the lecture. he would put a question before class and won't accept, just nodding his head in negative, until a perfect answer is given. I figured out that he won't ask for the data, known materials or the lay out or details of a process, shortly he won't ask for "what" but "why". he gave me maximum note in viva though I could only manage to answer 4 out of 5 questions. when I asked him, he told me that I only see who is able to be an engineer, by replying to "why" part of question and I don't see how well a student has memorized the usually known details. I also saw him fighting and struggling for a student in the detention case when the case was not justified. so i see him as one of the best professors as well as nice ones among his fellows for the values he cared for. In my Job too, my boss was widely feared for his temper even though many sub ordinates were sort of "yes boss" types. I, however, was one of his key vocal critics, when it was about work approach, productivity and projects and many colleagues advised me to change my attitude but still he always placed me among top three. though I disagreed with him frequently yet he never had temper problem with me as such. I figured out that he wanted "work" and not "yes boss" attitude which was main cause of his temper. so professionally I appreciate his honesty about the work. There is another example about a person who looked really nice, polite and sober but came out to be one of the worst forms of criminals. My Conclusion is that unless you have a personal experience with somebody in all three spheres of life or at least in one or two, you can't actually judge that person by looks. ah a famous quote, "looks are often deceptive":-).
• Saint Vincent And The Grenadines
17 Jun 07
Neat explanation...short as usual LOL..thank you :)
1 person likes this
@kamran12 (5555)
• Pakistan
17 Jun 07
LOL! I'll really try to be as short as possible as I am learning how to make replies more concise. But the discussions you post are not only interesting but also need explanation. I hope I'll improve with time.
• Saint Vincent And The Grenadines
18 Jun 07
Your replies are very interesting, and i really appreciate them, thank you :)
@rosie_123 (6118)
17 Jun 07
Well of course it's true that inner beauty is more important, and it's what a person is like as a character and personality that really matters, but if I'm totally honest, when I was back in my "dating" days, external beauty was very important to me. Looking back, I always tended to go for the guys that were considered "better looking than average" - whatever that means. Perhaps I was shallow - I did a lot of modelling as a teenager - so guess it was quite a "glamourous" world, and I suppose I got a kick out of being on the arm of the best looking guy in the room or something - sad but true! Now of course I'm older and I see there is far more to life than looks - kindness/gentleness/intelligence etc. so I guess I'm lucky that my partner of the last 20 years has all those - and is STILL the best looking guy in the room! LOL! Btw - I think your avatar is cute too:-))
• Saint Vincent And The Grenadines
17 Jun 07
aww thank you...your pussycat is not bad either!! ooo modeling eh? gorgeous girl here...that's cool.
1 person likes this
@rosie_123 (6118)
18 Jun 07
LOL – I think I’m 25 years past being a gorgeous "girl2!!! Thank you anyway – and thanks from Sasha (on the avatar) – he’s happy that you think he’s smart!
• Saint Vincent And The Grenadines
18 Jun 07
see i always thought i had a thing with cats....LOL.
• Saudi Arabia
17 Jun 07
As for me I guess what matters in a person is the inside, the charcter. I ain't gonna say appearance is not important but it should not be the criteria by which you weigh a person. If i wanted 2 be more rational, I do believe a person is 100%. Part of it is the core, the personality or let us say the inside and the other part is outside or let's say the appearance, noone and i mean NOone can exceed the 100%. So we all have our shares; spirit-wise and looks-wise. My dear friend TAKE IT FOR GRANTED when someone is 80% in appearance this directly makes it he/she has got 20% inside. I myself rather be 70% inside and 30 % outside, am I really like that ?? I don't know. Note when I say outside, i don't mean if he or she is naturally beautiful or handsome I mean as you said appearance and appearance means how much he takes care and spend time on how she/he look like, in other words, I can identify it as the extra effort a person puts 2 make himself look better in appearance. Appearance could be his clothes, his outfit, his jewellery, his car, his watch bla bla bla just name it. Thank you very much for this post.
• Saint Vincent And The Grenadines
17 Jun 07
Thank you very much for this thorough answer deadraven...really instructive:) Not sure if i understand your phrase about percentages though...
• Saudi Arabia
18 Jun 07
Hi there What i meant my friend is the following: If someone extremely takes care of his appearance, for instance he'd spend fortune just 2 fix his appearance ( his suit, car, watch ...), he may base his initial judgment on people on their appearance, mostly you'd find this person poor when it comes to the inside or the sipiritual side . When someone is pure from the inside, he's got a wonderful soul, he/she is senstive 2 beauty, he cares etc.. I mean deep insdie you'd find her/him a great and a good person when it comes 2 ethics, views bla bla that kind of person would not give priority to appearacne, he would ride a reasonable car but he wouldn't die if he did not have a Ferrari, she/he would buy a nice and a reasonable outfit but would not spend all his money 2 buy a brand if he could not afford it, mainly he'd fall in love with an ordinary woman whose beauty is average but he loved coz in his eyes she is a lovely and caring person not because she is just hot. All in all we are 100 percent we're other appearance-oriented or character-oriented. It is comination but one side is more dominanat. Remember you can't have 100% appearance or 100% character it is always combination of both but percentages vary from one person 2 another. Thank you my friend.
• Saint Vincent And The Grenadines
18 Jun 07
ok, got it now, thanks for clarifying :)
• Philippines
17 Jun 07
Appearance is just an outside beauty,what's more important is showing whom you really are to the world.When you feel good from within im sure it would reflect your beauty, your appearance.Though there is this saying that "Beauty is in the eye of the beholder". To some appearance does matter. But as for me,looks is just a superficial beauty, what's important is the attitude.
• Saint Vincent And The Grenadines
17 Jun 07
I agree that the most important thing is the inner beauty, that is, the attitude. How you treat people, your sense of humour...that's what matters. Anyway as you said a bit of appearance does matter...we all prefer to see a nice looking face or body than a non good looking one..right? But hey, it's not the main thing at all, but if we can choose we prefer good looks.
• Philippines
17 Jun 07
well , initially, maybe when you meet someone on the street walking and you saw someone with a perfect body, long legged legs, long hair etc..etc.. you'll hav eyour second glance, or a Hunk who have handsome face...thats your initial reaction bcoz you admire..butt doesnt mean that appearance matter already..thse were just initial reaction...as for me inner beauty is still more important =)
• Saint Vincent And The Grenadines
17 Jun 07
Inner beauty is what makes any kind of relationship (love, fiendship...) last, so yes, i agree, it's more important.
@mummymo (23707)
17 Jun 07
Truthfully - a persons looks aren't that important - it is what is underneath that counts! On the other hand though it doesn't hurt to make sure you are clean and presentable! Unless someone is really dirty then I don't really pay that much attention to looks! xxx
• Saint Vincent And The Grenadines
17 Jun 07
Yeah, appearance is not only the looks...if you have a nice hygiene and wear proper clothes you obviously won't cause the same impression as if you haven't showered in a couple of days and you wear shoddy clothes...that's obvious enough, isn't it?
1 person likes this
@mummymo (23707)
17 Jun 07
That is what I pay most attention to! I still like to look as nice as I can - but it is for me and not for everyone else out there! xxx
• India
17 Jun 07
I never look at the person's appearance before making friends with him/her. If I find the person interesting I talk to him/her or else just leave it aside. I think looks are not as important as the personality of a person. To justify my views I would like to give you some examples with which it will be apperent that personality is what matter and not the appearance. Some great men like Gandhiji, Nepolean, Hitler etc are not great because of their appearance but the greatness is because of their personality. Of course, there are many people with popularity and notoriety buts its not because of their looks but because becoz of their inner self which is strong enough to throw a challenge to the whole world. Even generally speaking, nobody is respected for the looks they have but are respected for the personality and the achievements they have got in their life time.
• Saint Vincent And The Grenadines
17 Jun 07
I know what you're saying bk, but what i meant is that when you first see someone, what you have before you is a body and an appearance....and only after having that look you have the chance to see how that person is..his or her personality. So my theory is that we all care about the looks at least a little bit...if you meet a girl today and she's really good looking, you will notice that before you even start talking to her, and unconsciously you will take that in count when the conversation begins...which doesn't mean that once you get to know her you will forget about her looks and focus in how she's like.
• India
17 Jun 07
Yes, I agree with you. We will surely notice the looks of the person even before talking to him/her. For me it really doesn't matter how a person looks, but I'll surely make a mental note about their appearance and if I am courageous enough I'll even give compliments.hehehe...(especially with girls)..
• Kottayam, India
17 Jun 07
Your avatar tell a different story.
• Saint Vincent And The Grenadines
17 Jun 07
Well I don't think so..I think my avatar is cute LOL but anyway here in mylot it's different...it's not a normal social relationship...it's not even a chat so i don't think that appearances really matter for what we do here.
• Kottayam, India
17 Jun 07
I said your discussion and avatar does not match.I am sorry if it hurts you.It is my opinion, in discussion I can say my part you say your part you accept it or not it does not matter, however I said sorry.
• Romania
21 Jun 07
not always ...sometime yes ...sometime not is so important!
• Saint Vincent And The Grenadines
21 Jun 07
thanks for replying.
@joodzki6 (596)
• Philippines
20 Jun 07
i think yes..because the first thing that you will notice to a person is the appearance. Though, what really matters is the inside..most people are really looking at the outside appearance first. Because sometimes,when you first saw the person and he looks so dirty..untidy, not good looking..admit it you won't waste time to know him/her..true??? ..that's reality..admit it or not, it's up to you. But we have to remember that nobody's perfect, whether it is outside or inside of a person..let's not judge them.
• Saint Vincent And The Grenadines
20 Jun 07
Nobody is perfect, amen to that...thanks for replying mate.
• Pakistan
18 Jun 07
As we all heard "first impression is the last impression".Appearance does matter a lot.First impession is always based on the apearance of a person.When you get to know a person after meeting for a while then youll know how that person is from inside.
• Saint Vincent And The Grenadines
18 Jun 07
Yes, first impression is important...not only by the looks, also by the security that you transmit, etc. thanks for replying.
@kyutstudph (1263)
• Philippines
18 Jun 07
Yes I believe appearance is important, Even if you are not that goodlooking at least you know how to be hygienic and proper dress up then its fine. I am not the type of person who always pays attention on how a person looks but I appreciate people who have the looks. d=)
• Saint Vincent And The Grenadines
18 Jun 07
the main point here is: two people who are equally nice, kind, generous, etc. If one is better looking than the other....which one would most people choose? there you go.
@steney (1418)
• Philippines
18 Jun 07
For me, appearance is important. Yeah, we hear a lot of people saying it's the inside that counts, and it's not really what you see on the outside. But just like you said, if we're going to be honest about it, we really care about what we see first, before we decide to get to know a person more. What I'm saying here is good appearance that is not necessarily equivalent to good looks, but more on cleanliness and the general care of oneself. It is important that we are presentable first if we want people to want to get to know us better, or in some cases, for people to take us seriously.
• Saint Vincent And The Grenadines
18 Jun 07
I appreciate your honesty. I think you have said something that many people think but don't dare saying. thank you.
@syain1972 (1011)
• Singapore
18 Jun 07
Appearance does play an integral part in our lives eventhough there's a saying that what matters is on the inside..... For example, if we go for a job interview or any interview per se, people will look at our appearance before we are being judged on others. If you have a pretty face and some moderate intelligence, you'll definitely be chosen compared to one who is highly intelligent but failed on the looks department.... It's a cruel reality.... Sigh....I think a lot of people would look at the face value rather than the opposite....sigh sigh!!
• Saint Vincent And The Grenadines
18 Jun 07
you're right, sad but true. The fact is that looks are an important criteria when it comes to selecting people in the real world. thanks for replying :)
@cdparazo (5768)
• Philippines
18 Jun 07
I do think so too. In a way it matters to me but as far as appearance is concerned all I could say is that as long as he is clean and smells good, then that would be okey. Here in my country most people don't like dark skinned individuals. HOwever, I married one so dark whom others call not good looking. One colleague of mine once called him extraordinarily ugly because of is facial scar that makes his face a little unbalanced wherein the other side of his face appear sliced off or smaller than the other. Some of my friends also told me that I must be blind and they used to laugh at him or make jokes about him. They thought at that time that he was still courting me, but without their knowledge, we were already together for sometime already. They would always joke that they only see a DARK future for me whenever he is around and laugh. But I saw more than what they saw. I saw potential, intelligence, gentleness, a kind heart and a very calm disposition. So I may pay attention to looks but it's just to see if he is clean or not. What still matters to me is the inside of the person.
• Saint Vincent And The Grenadines
18 Jun 07
Well considering what you just told me about the person you married to, it's obvious that you mean it when you say that you focus in what really matters more than in looks. There should be more people that did what you did cd :)
@bcl_me (583)
• Philippines
18 Jun 07
Appearance is not really important but it helps a lot in the first impressions. That is why good looking people tends to attract more people pursuing them...coz they not only look good but so delicious as well. But for me...at appearance is what makes me notice a certain person...then know process begins so it istill undecided after I am already attracted by the appearance.
• Saint Vincent And The Grenadines
18 Jun 07
You have a point there. No matter how important appearance is for you, it can bring you far in this world. We can see examples of it everyday in the media. But then when it comes to private relationships, the way you are gets more and more important.
@egortizv (225)
• United States
18 Jun 07
i am personally very self conscious..as you could tell from some of the discussions ive started. it shouldnt be important..but i always wanna make a good first impression and it makes me happy to look in the mirror and like waht i see.
• Saint Vincent And The Grenadines
18 Jun 07
Well i think that a look to the mirror to see if you're looking fine is not bad after all..i think most of us do it. Causing a good impression is always a good thing as long as it doesn't get to the point of obsession.
@nangel78 (1458)
• United States
17 Jun 07
First impressions count especially interviewing, networking, presentations, and so forth. While personality does come out after getting to know someone, first impressions make a lasting impact.
• Saint Vincent And The Grenadines
17 Jun 07
thanks for the reply.
@federickp (607)
• India
17 Jun 07
yes appearance matters a lot. The way you dress yourself matters a lot. It tells the other person how you keep up yourself, how much importance you give to neatness and tidiness. Its a mark of personality, whenever you go to an interview or something, then the way you dress also has some marks assigned to it. We need to take care as it puts the first impression on the viewer. Also good and neat and tidy clothes gives us great pleasure and a feeling of confidence withing ourselfs which fills us with lot of enthusiasm, hence clothes you wear are very important thing to look upon.
• Saint Vincent And The Grenadines
17 Jun 07
I agree that when a person makes an effort to look nice, to be clean, etc but without taking it to the point of obsession, it can mean you are concerned about yourself, you care about yourself, your self esteem is adequate. Problem comes when some people just care about that outer part and not the main one, inner part.
@magica (3710)
• Bulgaria
17 Jun 07
For me it`s not important, i never believe to my first impression and prefer to trust my second one. But i am vulnerable because of my appearance, so i cant ignore it completely.
• Saint Vincent And The Grenadines
17 Jun 07
thanks for sharing magica.