Do you get frustrated when your children do not listend?

@anetteh (3591)
Sweden
August 15, 2007 3:44am CST
Mostely my son listen to me when I need to make the decisions for some reason. He is 16 so you have to let them make their own decisions sometimes in order to grow up and become and individual. But sometimes we parent have to make decisions and in those times I can be frustrated when He want listen to me. How about you? How do your solve the problem?
3 responses
@mistissa (1348)
• Netherlands
15 Aug 07
I think it is the age of not listening, he is ofcourse a teenager. And how to solve it I don't know. Just leave him be, he must make his own mistakes. You can just give your opinion about it
@anetteh (3591)
• Sweden
17 Aug 07
Hello, and thank´s for responding. I think you are absolutely right. When children come to a certan age they are supose to leav parants rules. But in the same time we as parents have to keep on going telling them what they can or cant do. Thats the main thing for them to make in the big world. Kids in the late teens gets harder to parenting to. I try to become both a parent but also an adviser instead of getting in hard konflikts and bad behavier from my self. I have done that wiht my oldest, who now live by her self and make her own decisions and must say she do alright. It´s harder with the younger one since he have the disorder of ADHD. It give me a harder job as a parent. You can not really give advises without describe what you really mean. This is a hot topic and I am greatful for your respond.
@carolscash (9503)
• United States
15 Aug 07
It is extremely frustrating to me when my kids do not listen to me. I have one who turned 16 almost 5 months ago and I swear it is not my kid. It seems like I am always saying the same thing over and over. As a home school parent, my kids know that I am not going to stop talking to them about their behavior so you would think that they would be a better listener. I believe that they will be okay and make good decisions in their life, but sometimes I wonder.
@anetteh (3591)
• Sweden
17 Aug 07
Hello and thank´s for responding. This is a hot topic. I do understand what you feel. I can almost see my self sometimes when the kids was younger. But as you I started whith another aproch. Instead of getting in konflikts I started to listend to the kids and try to make out of there wishes. And thinking of it, than I gave them oppertunities to think about and in that way they can make a good decision on their own request. My oldes now live on her own and doing great. It´s harder for my younger one since he have the disorder of ADHD. It´s harder to parenting. But everywher, and everyone I talk to say I do a great job. As I said, this is a hot topic. I have tryed to be both a parant and an adviser and I think that is better in stead of shouting and starts konflikts.
• India
15 Aug 07
No, doubt, I as a mother for two, often get frustrated when they do not listen to us. And I shout above my voice to explain them, what they do is wrong, and often end up with, not of much results,except a comment from my husband, that I behave like a psyche... So, I have decided, to find the root cause for this problem.W e have to spend a lot of time with the childern, and probably, the time whole time when they are with us, we must attend to their even small requests...and we must engage them in one work or the other according to their interests... Whenever we get free time, sit with them to explain them the result of their behaviour... Hope Mother's role is much needed until they start their own life...
@anetteh (3591)
• Sweden
17 Aug 07
Hello and thanks for responding. I noticed this is a hot topic. Frustration with kids who not listend when you know you know best is really hard to take. But when my daughter became in her teens I made a nother aprouch. Instead of getting in konflikts with her I started to listend to her wishes, thought about them and then gave her som oppertunitys to adress and then she made her own decisions. Mostly she really made the decision I would make. I now use that with my son, but since he have disorder of ADHD I have to think harder, explain more and that can be frustrating becouse you never know if what you say will be aplyed or if it will end up in a konflikt. But I always try to be with him. Listen do him and in fact learn from him to make my job as parant easyier.