Would you reveal you past to the person you getting married to?
By sang2k2
@sang2k2 (1833)
India
November 2, 2007 5:09am CST
Hi friends,
Would you like to reveal you past love life to the person whom you are getting married to? when would you reveal before the wedding or after the wedding?
Has any body done this?If its love marriage i fell it is easier to reveal as compared to the arrange marriage ans especially for the women?
2 people like this
7 responses
@dpk262006 (58675)
• Delhi, India
10 Nov 07
I think it would be better not reveal about past love affairs to your current partner. I feel no body likes in her heart that his husband had any affairs in the past. The problem is if you tell about your affairs in good faith, it can boomranged when your partner's mood is not alright.....and she may start disblieving you in the slightest pretext.
@dpk262006 (58675)
• Delhi, India
10 Nov 07
Thanks for agreeing with me. Please do not think too much about that position...if the partner comes to know...through any other channel...about any past affair(s). It is not necessary...that he/she would come to know.....until and unless he/she is very suspicious or sensitive by nature. Chances are slim that the other partner comes to know about any past happening.....even if he comes to know.....he may not know the true,correct and detailed picture.... at a later stage...if he probes about the affairs, then many replies can be thought of and given ......for tackling the situation.
There is a saying and I find it very interesting - "Think about crossing a bridge...when you reach the bridge"
Making assumptions on certain situations does not help.
Have a great day!
Deepak
@sang2k2 (1833)
• India
10 Nov 07
hi dpk,
i agree to what you said as even i have a same opinion which forced me to post this discussion to know the majority views. Thats true that if revealed a person may keep on talking about that whenevr angry or what always suspect on those lines no matter even if the case wouldnt be like that.
But i am equally thinking on the other grounds about this like if not revealed and some thing happens which tells the story of the past to your partner then?
1 person likes this
@ssh123 (31073)
• India
10 Nov 07
In our community, most marriages are arranged marriage. One in hundred is love marriage and that too plenty of time is there for both to discuss and they again approach their parents to arrange for a marriage.
@subha12 (18441)
• India
12 Nov 07
its depends on the relationship with that person. It also depends on hoew the person is going to react.
If it is the case that the person is very liberal and open minded, then its good to reveal it before marriage.
If the situation is not like that, then better to wait and watch.
@praveenkalias1981 (95)
• India
10 Nov 07
I am not married. My frank opinion is no one tell all his past experiences to partner. I think, don't try to know the past of your partner if he/she don't revel it and live in the present is good.
@Pompon (1757)
• Poland
11 Nov 07
I would told with my future husband especialy if it could affect him in any way. Arrange marriages aren't seen in my country these days so I don't look at the marriage from that perspective. Moreover, I'm a catholic and it is said that if I don't tell my fiance about certain things before the wedding the marriage can be anulled.
@taskata10 (627)
• China
11 Nov 07
Hi!
As we all know, everyone has their own secerets in their hearts. These secrets maybe have nothing or something to do with partners. So keeping secrets after marriage is good to both. Because marriage is based on the understanding and trust. It's no necessary to reveal one's past. What do you think of it?
@shak143 (1280)
• India
2 Nov 07
of course i like to reveal my past life to whom iam going to marry and i espect the same from opposite side. After knowing everything if they had no objectino them marry otherwise no.it's better not to have.with out telling them about our past if we have any if we marry and afterwards they came to know about it then defenetly it will became a problem or the past life one may blackmail us.so to be in safe side and to lead a good life there should not be any thing to be hide.whether it may be love marriage or arrange one.
