the great debate... to have another or not to have another.

No, there are too many people in the world. all the best urban

I am almost in the same situation as you. We had our two girls but we wanted a boy, so we had one more. we finally got our boy. But now, we are having so much fun having a boy, we went from "no we got our boy, we are done" to "well, if we could have another boy..maybe" I think if you can handle 4 kids go for it. don't let anyone else tell you what is right for you. thats where i'm having trouble. I'm almost more worried about what everyone else will say more than if we can handle it.

well I just have to say, I know how you feel but, my cousin has two boys, 8 and 6, it is SO HARD to try for a girl, the chances of having a girl when you have had two boys (Just two boys) is 90%...you have three! My friend has three boys, when she had her son she was hoping she would have a girl, well she had another baby boy, they are three years apart. When she was thinking about having another baby, she was really torn, she knew that the chances of her having another boy were very high but she really wanted to have a girl. She figured that after a few years she would know what she wanted to do, after the first month of getting her period back, she got pregnant....WITH A BOY. She was a bit heartbroken but at the same time just freaking out. These two are only 21 months apart. Anyway, after she had him she was SO DONE. She just said that although she wanted to have a girl, she just was no longer having any thoughts about wanting to get pregnant nore thinking of having more than 3 kids. She has a lot of friends who have girls (Me I have two) and she just has no desire to have anymore kids. She is happy with her boys and now they are 9, 6 and 5. I think this is the first year she will actually have all kids in school fulltime...well actually, she won't have her youngest in fulltime, but he will be in part time kindergarten. anyway, For me, although it would be fun to have a third, I worry we just end up with another girl, not sure how I would feel about a boy, I would be fine but would rather have another girl and I just can not afford to have a girl, I mean, another girl it is just too much. Plus my kids are 4 and 2 and SO not ready to even bother with another pregnancy right now and I am already 36. My sister just had her third child at the age of 38, she will be 39 in a few months, and her youngest will be just about 4 months when she turns 39....I would want to wait for my youngest to be like 3 or 4 before I even thought of getting pregnant but I can not even think of having a baby at 38 or 39....I just want to be a happy family of 4. Everyone has their wishes, if you want another baby then you should go for it, because if you do not maybe you will regret it

I kind of know what you mean and have to say you're lucky that it's an option because 4 children isn't that big of a number. S/o and I have only 3 boys together and no girls which I really wanted BU he had two children (a boy and a girl) before 'us' and I had 3 (2 girls and 1 boy). So with 8 total there's no way we're in any position to try again for a girl together even though I'd really like to go through the "pink stuff" one more time...he and I aren't in a good position together to even consider another child either if you know what I mean. Since you know you don't want to try again right now anyway, I say just give it time. You have no idea what the next few years will bring so just enjoy your boys for now and hope that cicumstances allow for a girl sometime down the road.

Its your life despite what any of us say. What I say might be cold, callous, boorish, even cruel, but maybe when the time is right.. you could try to have a biological child, or you could adopt a child, or you could step back and look at this this way: you have 3 children and a whole family, there is a lot to be blessed and hopeful for as is. Pragmatically and in either case, another child is more work and could make your lives more hectic. You would have to consider yourself, your husband, your family, your needs and if you can handle another child. This is a serious issue in my view. Again, its your life despite what I say, despite what any of us say. No matter what you choose I wish you the best.

I would say that's for both of you to decide. My hubby and I have three, two are his (girl and boy) and one is ours - girl. Since we have both and all three of them have different personalities, I don't feel like I'm technically missing anything. I did love being pregnant except for 20 weeks of morning sickness and fatigue, and I get baby fever now and then, but as the older kids are both in high school and the little one is four - AND we are 30ish and 40ish, I think we are done. I will admit if my husband suddenly decided that he wanted another, I'd be on board in a heartbeat. I think it would take something big, like some type of lottery winning where he could retire early and we could just live off it for the next.... 70 years. Then we could afford things like a van, bigger house, college for more kids, retirement. LOL! I don't see this happening, I never buy lottery tickets. =P Having kids and having more kids is a personal decision, up to each couple on their own, and nobody else. I do think it's important to have resources to take care of any kids you have, financial, emotional, physical, experience and knowledge too. If those bases are all covered, numbers don't matter, and other people should not feel like they can ever tell somebody to have more kids, or not have more kids. Just my two cents. I tell other people who get nosy that until the day they are responsible for MY kids, they have no say.

That's just one of those things you have to figure out on your own. I have 4 kids. We are still debating trying for another boy. We have 1 boy and 3 girls right now. But the decision to have #4 was pretty easy. We had 3 kids right in a row in the first 3 years of our marriage. We had to stop after that because we were living with family. We said when we moved out we would try for another boy. We moved in June 2005 and I was pregnant by the end of July. We now have a 7yo (girl), 6yo (boy), 5yo (girl) and a 20 month old (girl). I really want another boy. My son wanted a little brother so badly when I was pregnant last time. he was devastated when I told him he had another sister (he was 4 1/2 when the baby was born). He ran to Daddy crying and yelling "no". But then we let him hold her first and he instantly bonded with her and is the most devoted big brother ever. And his sister worships the ground he walks on. She follows him every where and is always calling out to him (she did not take it well when he started school).