home wrecker

By gems
Philippines
January 15, 2008 10:50pm CST
A couple of weeks ago, my younger sister told me of a family problem she and our youngest sibling found out while they were having a vacation in our parents' house. But even before I heard the news, I had the inkling about this. Our father who is in his mid-50's is having an elicit affair with a younger female again. It's been almost twenty years since the affair happened with a different girl. This time, it was one with his former student. She even sends text messages to my father and vice versa. This was also the means by which my sister discovered this affair. Aside from this problem, I'm very much worried with my mom's feelings in this particular situation. She has always been very loyal to my father and the family. Also, I'm pretty sure that she's also thinking of my youngest sibling who's on the family way right now; who was forced to stop college schooling because of her situation. She and her boyfriend aren't married yet because the guy is still a minor. I even posted a discussion about this two or three months ago. Honestly, even I am finding it very hard to focus on my work at the moment because of these issues. I have my own family with one daughter but I'm still concerned with my parents and siblings, naturally. My sister decided to disguise herself as a male and texted the "other woman". She did threaten this "single" woman but this home wrecker retaliated that our father is guilty of child abuse. She's turning 19 this year. What are your views on this? Has it happened to you or to anyone you knew? How did you react to this? Is it right to threaten her? What legal steps could the family take? I need some advice and thanks in advance.
1 person likes this
3 responses
@rockvixen (895)
• United States
16 Jan 08
The worst thing you can do is threaten her, so no I don't recommend doing so. But you may want to talk to her personally, there has to be a reason for this situation. I really feel for you and your family and I know how you feel. Only it happend a few years ago with my inlaws. It's a long story but similar. Unfortunatly the homewreker got her way, but in your situation you can still try to contact her, and let her know what is going on. It's not fair to your mother, and it's wrong of your father do to this. I say in this situation everyone needs to come out in the open, even if it hurts.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
8 Feb 08
It's been approximately a month since I started this discussion; and honestly, I've been so busy tidying up after the holiday season that I haven't had the luxury of time to read the responses I've got from my post; aside from all the office jobs I've got to attend to. Anyway, I could say that this situation is at a standstill for the moment. I have to admit that we're all too cautious to do anything about it. I'll be thinking about your advice over the following days. Thanks so much.
@rsa101 (13337)
• Philippines
16 Jan 08
I think the best answer is with poster #1. Everyone is or must be open to one another about the situation. The truth really hurts but it should be done and corrected. Talking to the third party may be done later when the family has already decided what to do with this situation.
• Philippines
8 Feb 08
My mom and her other officemates have been offerred a retirement package this January 2008 and naturally, she decided to invest the money in a business. She will be more of a homebody these days. I don't know if I'm right but I believe this would be beneficial to the family and maybe, we could address the situation regarding the "dad's affair" issue this time. I hope this will correct the family issue finally. I admit that none of us is brave enough to talk with the third partner eye to eye. Thanks for the advice.
1 person likes this
@rsa101 (13337)
• Philippines
8 Feb 08
I totally understand why you cannot talk to the third party involve. With your mother retired from work, I do not know how this will help but if her work was the main reason why your father started engaging in an illicit affair then I get it already. But with your mother retired and a homebuddy already would not solve the problem just like that. I do hope that you could deal with the problem squarely and sparingly. Try to hear th voices of each party involve and learn from those so that it will not repeat in your case.
• Indonesia
16 Jan 08
Really? Can your father be guilty of child abuse bcos of this? She's 19 right?
• Philippines
8 Feb 08
Same thought as mine. But I guess she's got a reason why she said what she said. She could be lying about her age, right?! Sometimes when I think of this situation, I feel I'd like to consult a legal person or attorney for this matter. As of this time, we haven't done anything about this.