Mom, I got a cat....did you know Mickey Rooney is 87?...did you see...?????
By ctrymuziklvr
@ctrymuziklvr (11057)
United States
January 27, 2008 8:58pm CST
Since I lost my mother on Jan. 2 I feel like I'm losing my mind. I would have called her to tell her all about my cat and she would have been so happy for me. Tonight I would have called her to remind her about the award show and we would be amazed that Mickey Rooney is still alive! lol...I noticed that Tony Bennett was on channel 2 tonight and I would have called to tell her so she could watch it....so many things that I would have called to tell her and now I can't and I'm missing her so bad that I feel like I'm losing my mind. I've been trying so hard to get through this and for days I think I did so good but all of a sudden it seems to just be hitting me in the stomach like a bag of cement. I apologize for always talking about this but you guys are my captive audience when I feel I have to get my thoughts out and when I read your thoughts they always make me feel a little bit better.....
4 people like this
11 responses
@cindawelch (28)
• United States
28 Jan 08
I too lost my mother, I lived next door to her my entire adult life, and even moved her into my house 3 years before she passed away ( after a stroke)and cared for her every day.
I too thought I would loose my mind. It has been almost 3 years and I still think of her everyday - even catch myself going to tell her or ask her something.
So my heart goes out to you.
For me Christ has been my strength, even after I lost my husband only 4 months after my mother.
Sweetie it don't get any easier - we just learn to cope. So expect some days to be better than others, and some days to be extremely difficult to get through.
@ctrymuziklvr (11057)
• United States
29 Jan 08
I think my problem is I haven't even gotten over losing my Dad even after 19 years and now I've lost my Mom. I know it doesn't get easier and I'm learning to cope and just taking it day by day.
@kimbers867 (2539)
• United States
28 Jan 08
It will get easier trust me. I lost my mom 3 years ago and it still feels like yesterday. 7 a.m. is the hardest for me, that is when I use to call her everyday and we would share about my daughters, etc. She would be at work, just starting her day, so we would have a quick chat. My sister-in-law would call me the first month every day at that time, because she knew it was very hard for me.
There are still times that I wish I could share with her, especially since her girls, her grandchildren, are getting older.
Honestly talk to your doctor, there are support groups out there that can help you.
Someone suggest to me to start writing in a journal about the things I would tell my mom. I haven't done this but want to.
I feel your pain. My mom was my best friend in the world. Just remember to always keep her in your heart and your thoughts, she will be watching over you.
1 person likes this
@kimbers867 (2539)
• United States
29 Jan 08
I can totally relate. My oldest had 7 years with her grandmom and my youngest only had 3. Some days it hits my youngest the worse. The sad thing is that they don't have any grandparents left on Earth. That's what really hurts! Thank goodness for Uncles and Aunts, but it is not the same.
Something we do, when the kids are feeling blue or if it is her birthday. We write a note, attached it to a helium filled balloon and send "heaven" mail. The kids watch it until it disappears and goes up to heaven. This even makes me feel good.
@ctrymuziklvr (11057)
• United States
29 Jan 08
Now when something comes up...especially with my kids or grandkids I think "mom...do you see this?" and I hope so bad that she does. She was also close to my kids and grandkids and they are hurting as much as I am.
@gabs8513 (48686)
• United Kingdom
28 Jan 08
Sweetie do not apologize for talking about this all the time as you are getting it out of your System and that is good
It will take time it has only been a short while
So do not think you are loosing your Mind it is your way of grieving of trying to cope with it of remembering
It takes a while to get over it and you will eventually
Big Hugs to you
@ctrymuziklvr (11057)
• United States
29 Jan 08
Sometimes I feel if I don't get everything out I'll go stark, raving mad...lol! I'm trying to take one day at a time and coping with each little thing that comes up...that's all I can do.
@sarahruthbeth22 (43143)
• United States
28 Jan 08
Don't you dare apologize. You are still mourning and that is natural.Whenever I have something I would have told my mom, I still say it out loud and i just know she can hear me.So tell her about Bigguy and Mickey and everything else.And give yourself all the time you need.Take Care.
1 person likes this
@ctrymuziklvr (11057)
• United States
29 Jan 08
Believe it or not I do tell her everything still and out loud. It's not hearing her that's hurting so badly.
1 person likes this
@ctrymuziklvr (11057)
• United States
29 Jan 08
lol...so far my kitty is useless!!! He still wants nothing to do with me...he's making me feel REAL GREAT!!....lol....but he's a challenge.
@CoffeeAnyone (3210)
• Canada
28 Jan 08
What a blessing you have had in your life to be so close to your mother. Were you always that close? Were there hard times when you didn't talk? What was the thing you loved about your mother most? I am always curious about these things because I am not close to my mom that way. It is sad really but I don't think we know how to be close.
1 person likes this
@Modestah (11179)
• United States
30 Jan 08
oh honey, I know what you mean! so many times I want to call my dad for his sage advice of this or that or to hear his voice which was so comforting - so many times I think of something he would enjoy and have an impulse to purchase it or call and tell him about it - to remember, oh. can't do that.
I know it is hard on my mother she does well keeping herself busy during the day, but at night when she is all alone and has no one to share her day with... you'll never guess who I ran into today, dear! oh.
@raychill (6525)
• United States
28 Jan 08
No One ever said you had to stop talking to her.
Sure maybe you can't call her up on the telephone but you can still talk to her. She probably won't talk back to you and you won't hear her voice, but you don't have to stop talking to her just because she passed away.
1 person likes this
@asgtswife04 (2475)
• United States
28 Jan 08
It's okay to grieve and miss your mom. This is still very new to you and you will have good days and you will have bad, but you need to grieve the best way that you know how. You will never get over the loss of her, but I promise you it does get better and the days get easier. I'm sorry to hear about the loss of your mother. I know it must be very devestating for you and sad to say the least. Just know that you have friends here on mylot and we are here any time you need us. God bless
1 person likes this
@kimberlylynn (978)
• United States
29 Jan 08
she's around, just keep talking to her because she is listening and wants you to still share these things. Maybe some of those things you see that remind you of her are being put there by her just for that reason.
@chrysz (1602)
• Philippines
29 Jan 08
I feel the same when my grandather passed away. I was the most devastated in the family because I am closest to him. Until now, I still yearn for his presence but what can we do? At least he is more peaceful now right? All we can do right now to count the blessings that they were with us, shared good memories with us.If we will live through mourning, they won't be happy for us. Instead, do to other people what we would have wanted to do with her/him.
