Why Beautiful Women Marry Less Attractive Men

women - why women marry less attractive men?
@djmarion (4898)
Philippines
April 13, 2008 2:24am CST
"I have seen a lot of good looking couple that are so sweet together at the start of their relationship and then suddenly call it quits during few years, i also see alot of beautiful women marrying less-good looking men and they seem happier, as i read this article i realize why..." Women seeking a lifelong mate might do well to choose the guy a notch below them in the looks category. New research reveals couples in which the wife is better looking than her husband are more positive and supportive than other match-ups. The reason, researchers suspect, is that men place great value on beauty, whereas women are more interested in having a supportive husband. Researchers admit that looks are subjective, but studies show there are some universal standards, including large eyes, "baby face" features, symmetric faces, so-called average faces, and specific waist-hip ratios in men versus women. Past research has shown that individuals with comparable stunning looks are attracted to each other and once they hook up they report greater relationship satisfaction. These studies, however, are mainly based on new couples, showing that absolute beauty is important in the earliest stages of couple-hood, said lead researcher James McNulty of the University of Tennessee. But the role of physical attractiveness in well-established partnerships, such as marriage, is somewhat of a mystery. The new study, published in the February issue of the Journal of Family Psychology, reveals looks continue to matter beyond that initial attraction, though in a different way. Supportive spouses McNulty's team assessed 82 couples who had married within the previous six months and had been together for nearly three years prior to tying the knot. Participants were on average in their early to mid-20s. Researchers videotaped as each spouse discussed with their partner a personal problem for 10 minutes. The tapes were analyzed for whether partners were supportive of spouses' issues, which included goals to eat healthier, to land a new job and to exercise more often. "A negative husband would've said, 'This is your problem, you deal with it,'" McNulty said, "versus 'Hey, I'm here for you; what do you want me to do?; how can I help you?'" A group of trained "coders" rated the facial attractiveness of each spouse on a scale from 1 to 10, with the perfect 10 representing the ultimate babe. About a third of the couples had a more attractive wife, a third a more attractive husband and the remaining partners showed matching looks. Trophy wives Overall, wives and husbands behaved more positively when the woman was better looking. The finding "seems very reasonable," said Dan Ariely, a professor of behavioral economics at MIT's Program in Media Arts and Sciences and Sloan School of Management. "Men are very sensitive to women's attractiveness. Women seem to be sensitive to men's height and salary," said Ariely, who was not involved in the recent study. In couples with more attractive husbands, both partners were less supportive of one another. McNulty suggests wives mirror, in some ways, the level of support they get from husbands. "The husband who's less physically attractive than his wife is getting something more than maybe he can expect to get," McNulty told LiveScience. "He's getting something better than he's providing at that level. So he's going to work hard to maintain that relationship." Men who are more attractive than their partners would theoretically have access to partners who are more attractive than their current spouses, McNulty said. The "grass could be greener" mentality could make these men less satisfied and less committed to maintain the marriage. Physical attractiveness of husbands is not as important to women, the researchers suggest. Rather, wives are looking for supportive husbands, they say. So it seems the mismatch in looks is actually a perfect match. "Equitable is unlikely to mean the same on every dimension," Ariely said during a telephone interview. "It just means that overall two people make sense together."
2 people like this
12 responses
• Philippines
13 Apr 08
I was once with my old college buddies and one of them asked our not-so-handsome classmate how he snagged his wife. He said, it was because of his sense of humor. Most women don't really have qualms about how men looks. If you ask me, I'd rather have an ugly husband who will hug me lots and take care of me rather than handsome husband who won't even talk to me. Like what they said, women are emotional. Regardless of how you look, a man must touch a woman's emotions to make her interested in you.
1 person likes this
@djmarion (4898)
• Philippines
15 Apr 08
that's true, i have once experience on my former boyfriend way back my sophomore college, he is very good looking and he looks more a lady than me. our problem is always on physical aspect, i bet you know what's i'm talking about, it seems he can't accept me as me and wants me to reinvent and do a makeover for my physical looks, we ended our relationship due to that problem.
@p_vadla (1685)
• India
14 Apr 08
There are two scenarios in this issue. These are only individual guesses. Scene-1: An attractive husband and a not so beautiful wife are taking a walk together.Naturally, the onlookers just glare at attractive husband and may think how that fantastic guy married such an ugly lady. conclusion : The sympathy is with the husband. He is viewed as ' great '. Here the wife gets left out or neglected or inferior being or unimportant. Scene-2: An attractive wife and an ugly looking husband are taking a walk together.Naturally, the onlookers just glare at the attractive lady and may think how that fantastic woman married such an ugly man. conclusion : The sympathy is with the wife. She is viewed as ' great '. Here the husband gets left out or neglected or inferior being or unimportant. Perhaps this is how the women might think unconsciously as far as beautiful marrying an ugly !
@p_vadla (1685)
• India
15 Apr 08
Its great that my response had some thing in it.Thank for choosing this as the best.
@Jemina (5770)
15 Apr 08
Well, that's what the general observation is and I never really realized why. Now, I think that one major reason why men marry attractive women--at least in their sight--is because men fall in love through their eyes. While women also get attracted with the physical appearance of a guy but it's the guy's action that matters most to us, women. And that's where we differ from the men because we fall in love through our ears.
@aowaow (1516)
• Indonesia
16 Apr 08
I think it's because the sky is going to collapse soon.
@bradhart (659)
• United States
16 Apr 08
trophy wives often get stability, maturity or even someone they don't think will have any luck cheating on them... Some of them just aren't shallow.
@busta1baby (1230)
• United States
21 Apr 08
well its not always bout the looks in a relationship...u got to look at wats on the inside like there personality etc.
@subha12 (18441)
• India
14 Apr 08
i think they look upon the qualities more than the outer look. a person with a nice heart, who is beautiful from inside is always a beay=utiful person indeed. may be the outer looks are not so godd. i think in most cases women go for quality than the looks.
@johndur (3052)
• Pasig, Philippines
14 Apr 08
blond hair - blond haired woman
well with that i think it was just a coincidence...as i have noticed it,it also is like with handsome man and an ordinary looking woman...am i right?maybe those beautiful people dont want to get someone who looks better than them...or they may be looking inside their partners and not on their outside looks...or you may think they are not that beautiful but for others its an angel already...we dont have the same taste for beauty,what is beauty for you might not be beautiful for others....
@iamzhh (139)
• China
15 Apr 08
the reason that two people become husband and wife is often complex. and the physical attration is not the main element. to woman the physical attration is not that important while compared to it to man. but of course women won't choose the men they feel awful. the man who you think ungly may be very handsome to his wife;)
@cream97 (29087)
• United States
13 Apr 08
Well the reason for this would be. Beauty is only skin deep.
@rombi001 (941)
14 Apr 08
wow thats a long description of the discussion... :) I don't think appearance matters all that much...( I know you're thinking ugly people say that, well I don't consider myself ugly and even if I was I would probably have a better personality) I think people who are less attractive in appearance work harder to be attractive in other ways... And considering that the outer appearance can be changed with surgeries and stuff... Its better to be with someone with inner beauty...
• China
13 Apr 08
I Know of many beautiful wemen and I Think i know the reason Many beatiful women are arrogant in the relation of the lovers and many handsome men can not stand their atitudes,as a result they often turn to the less-loking girl who are warm and hamble to them,that let they feel important.But the less-looking men stick to chase the beatiful girl and they do not afraid failure.At last,the butiful girl married the less-looking man.