how do you handle it when people insult you?

@BYOLA2871 (4376)
South Africa
May 9, 2008 9:45am CST
Everyday we come across so many people as we go through life,but really one thing surprises me and that is the attitude of people especially the youngsters,why is it that people get so abusive and disrespectful these days the slightesrt prompt they are ready to insult others,i have been insulted so many times,At times i look at the person passing the insult and i just feel like strangling them but i only refrain from doing that by keeping my temper under control,how do you respond when you are insulted by others especially when there was no need for the insult?
9 people like this
38 responses
@lvaldean (1613)
• United States
9 May 08
I evaluate the source. Do they matter to me? Is their opinion important to me? Have they really insulted me or are they offering me relevant feedback? Sometimes what is viewed as a insult is simply bad communication. I simply ignore strangers, their opinions are less than relevant to me and thus not worthy of a response. The rest I evaluate the source and determine the response based upon the source.
1 person likes this
@BYOLA2871 (4376)
• South Africa
9 May 08
yes thanks for this very straight forward answr you are right to consider who is makingthe comment and i actually agree with you some people"s comment are worth loosing sleep over,and re evaluating the reason or the accuracy is also important.thanks ivaldean
@elisa812 (3034)
• United States
9 May 08
I think it's sad how cruel people can be sometimes-especially kids. It just seems like people never consider the feelings of others anymore. If someone was insulting me, I think I would just try to ignore them. Usually, if someone is doing that, then they probably just want your attention and want to see you get upset, so I would try to just pay no attention to them rather than giving them what they want. If I am upset by it, I try to wait until I can have some privacy to let out my frustration because I don't want to give them the satisfaction of knowing that they succeeded in getting to me. If they think that their insults aren't achieving anything, then hopefully they will just stop.
1 person likes this
@BYOLA2871 (4376)
• South Africa
9 May 08
hm,good thinking you can let out your anger in your prvate,i like that,never allow anyone get to you just ignore them thanks elis812
@ruth16 (82)
• India
9 May 08
i mostly ignore such people... i'd probably be tempted to do the same but i don't do it unless i'm really angry.....
1 person likes this
@BYOLA2871 (4376)
• South Africa
9 May 08
yes its better to be able to control one"s temper people will definitely throw sh its on you but you must learn to ignore lest you regret your actions thanks.
@tessah (6651)
• United States
9 May 08
you need to look at the source of information. does the person who insulted you, really matter? most often times, they dont.. these people are inconsequential to your existance and happiness.. thus, their insults hold no bearing whatsoever.
1 person likes this
@BYOLA2871 (4376)
• South Africa
9 May 08
hm,i agree with you ,in fact its better to just ignore them else you will do what you will later regret,true tessah
@cortjo73 (6503)
• United States
9 May 08
I am usually just so shocked that I stand there dumbfounded. I usually can't say anything and, it is almost always later, after stewing over it for the rest of the day, that I come up with a witty comeback that I could and should have used. LOL! Then, of course, I beat myself up even more for not thinking of the comeback then. So, in the end, they kick me once and then, when they aren't even around, they kick me again when I finally think up a good retort. So, in essence, they kick me when I am still down. LOL!
• United States
9 May 08
Hello, I normally just blow it off. My partner will say something smart elech like God bless you. I was always taught to just smile and not to let it show that it bothers you because they feed of of it.
1 person likes this
@checapricorn (16076)
• United States
9 May 08
Hello BYOLA, I am the type of person who listen and who have a heart for people! but, once I will be insulter nor hurt, I will not just sit down, I will fight for my right until the point that I can see fairness! It's not fair for me to let them insult me and I can't also sleep and forgive me if I will just let them do it without me doing anything!I respect people because in a way i want to be respected! Thanks for bring a nice topic!
1 person likes this
• Philippines
9 May 08
first, i really stay away from places, people, or discussions that would subject or place me in such position. but it is hard if such a person exist and you meet him daily. you just have have to study his ways..he must have some weakness!!! i mean know your possible enemy.
1 person likes this
@mikeysmom (2095)
• United States
9 May 08
it really depends greatly on the situation at hand. many factors come into play as to whether i will respond or not. sometimes the best thing to do is say nothing. if there are a group of people doing the insulting i will refrain especially if i am alone. why invite more trouble? besides they are only words as far as i am concerned and try to teach my young son the same. words hurt him greatly at this point in his life so he has a way to go there. i also use the ignoring techinique when i feel like i cannot control what may come out of my mouth and make things way worse. one place i never let people get away with insults are directly to my son if i am present and if i am in a store and a store employee is insulting in some way i give it right back in spades. i rarely if ever let a one on one insult go past without making some kind of a comment or slight right back because if i do not i usually kick myself later. like i said, it reall all depends.
1 person likes this
@Bebs08 (10691)
• United States
22 May 08
wow!! it;s a tough situation. I experienced being insulted too. Well, it's not pleasant to hear insulting words? My tendency is to get even. I used to give them back insults too? There are times that I can hold my temper but most often, I can't. There was one time that somebody insulted me, I give back to him doubled of what he said to me. From that time on he did not do it again with me. He was careful not to insult me again because he knows I am fierce.. hahaha!!! I am not a bad person, I am not looking for trouble but I tell them don;t start one because I wouldn't run away. lol. Sometimes you just need to be strong to fight if you are in the right tract. Don't give them an inch to destroy you. But be friendly to them don't start a fight, just defend yourself when they started one.
@BYOLA2871 (4376)
• South Africa
22 May 08
yes i agree with you and sincerely i dont even view you as a bad person,there is only much insult a person can take especially when the person seems very inconsequential in your life ,i hav e sometimes gotten myself giving back insults in times past but i just ignore it now,i guess we just get over some things as we grow older.
• India
10 May 08
do not over react when people try to insult you . it wud be just wise enough to stay calm and controlled. when you respond to any kind of insult the other person might get stronger words to defend his insult. why give those idiots a chance to disturb you further...just take off insults as a better chance to improve urself...why waste ur time arguing with those persons who may insult you .??
• India
10 May 08
thats a nice way to deal with people who insult you..
@Tabby123 (53)
• United States
9 May 08
When someone insults me I just laugh at them and brush it off because usually when people Insult you its only cause there insocure thereself so I just let it go instead of getting upset about it its not really worth it most of the time Let them think what they want you know what you feel inside and 9 out of 10% of the time you dont feel what there saying is true so how care just brush them ok but anyways.
@BYOLA2871 (4376)
• South Africa
9 May 08
really,i like your response most of these abusive people at the end of the end are not worth the attention they get from us when they get silly
@Bd200789 (2994)
• United States
9 May 08
I try to ignore it, at least in public. But it really hurts me when someone insults me, even if it isn't true.
@BYOLA2871 (4376)
• South Africa
9 May 08
yes its painful when you are insulted but what can you do than just ignore it if you dont want to get more insults?
• Philippines
9 May 08
I agree with you. More and more people now even the young ones are not too careful with what they've got to say. I really do not mind them. At least for as long as they do not cross my borders. I know that if I would mind them, they will just feel prouder that I took notice of them.
@BYOLA2871 (4376)
• South Africa
9 May 08
yes its better to ignore them especially those ones that think they know how to talk and just say what they like at anytime and to anybody without any cnsideration.Its unfortunate that things got to this point without our noticing it or doing something about it.ignoring is the best way to handle them.
9 May 08
I have been insulted so often that it no longer bothers me. I have found that ignoring the ignorant is the best way to deal with them. There is very little respect these days, so I can't see the point in letting it upset me anymore.
@BYOLA2871 (4376)
• South Africa
9 May 08
hm,thanks for that observation,people ahrdly respect others so why allow it to bother you,that is true talk,
@magikrose (5430)
• United States
9 May 08
I just ignore them. The only reason they are doing it is to get a reaction out of you and when you give them one then they got waht they wanted. The best thing is to just keep walking and ignore it. If enough people do this they will get bored and move on to something else.
@BYOLA2871 (4376)
• South Africa
9 May 08
yes,thanks for the response,we must learn to ignore a loyt of this things from people dont give in to what they want from you and they will get tired,you dont get arrested for ignoring people do you?good idea,thanks
• Canada
10 May 08
It depends on what the insult was about. If it is something to do with my kids then that is something I do not tolerate and I will put the person in their place but if it is reatarded things about what I am wearing or how I look I just walk away am not going to lower myself to their level and act like a child.
@alindahaw (1220)
• Philippines
10 May 08
Most of time I just give the person "the look" when he or she insults me. I really don't like to argue with people in public so as much as possible, I keep my temper in check. When things really get nasty, I walk out before I do something really stupid.
@angemac23 (2007)
• Canada
10 May 08
When someone insults me....I tell them to f**k off...lol....no really I do...I have no time for rude, ignorant people and no one has a right to insult anyone!
@lingli_78 (12861)
• Australia
10 May 08
i usually see the situation and how bad the insult is... if it is not too bad and i can still tolerate it, then i will just ignore it... but i will give the person a piece of my mind first before i go... but if it is really bad, then i will definitely take it further and deal with the insults until i am satisfied... usually, i just let it go because i just can't be bothered to deal with uneducated people... take care and have a nice day...