How do you deal with UPSETs on mylot?

@Erratic (724)
Australia
June 8, 2008 4:16am CST
I have read many discussions about people being upset because they recieved adverse comments or were criticised by someone online. Why be upset? Why would anyone take a comment so personally? I mean this is the net. I don't know you and you don't know me. Getting upset seems an exercise in frustration to me. I just shrug and think wtf. What do you do?
8 responses
8 Jun 08
I guess that for some people, interaction on message boards and web communities like facebook or bebo can be substatially the main social interaction they have. As such it can probably be nearly as upsetting for them to recieve harsh unpleasant responses here as it would in the "real" world. Sometime I find unpleasant responses upsetting me, but not so far on here, its been on other more specialist forums. Here, because its such a big site I think you just need to resign yourself to the fact that there are all kinds of people here including those who are just plain not very nice, troubled or worse. In the main part people here will be okay and so long as people use common sense re: any information they give out so that they are online savvy then they can just ignore responses they dont like. On Bebo you can block members from commenting. I dont know if you can do that here or not. It can be challenging to make your response a positive exercise and work out how to respond in a surprising unexpected way to a nasty comment, but that idea will only suit some folks. In Yorkshire (england) theres a saying "Theres nowt so queer as folk" which translates out as people in general are a pretty odd bunch. When I get a bad response I tend to remind myself of that saying as it helps me not to take it so personally.
@Erratic (724)
• Australia
8 Jun 08
Yep some people take it real seriously. When my son was on bebo I was contionually amazing at the hatred and violence some there seem to like. Good saying that one from Yorkshire. We have a similar one here. "You don't have to be Irish to be Irish." No offence to the Irish btw.
8 Jun 08
Bebo can be particularly unpleasant. I have strong reservations about that site as it seems to frequently be used by teens as an opportunity to be a cyber bully. My daughter has a good attitude about it but I'd still rather she stuck to other sites.
• United States
18 Jun 08
well i had to respond to this again since i have had it happen to me recently.. i didnt really retaliate like i would have usually but this guy pretty much said i asked to be molested and attacked because of how i look in my user pic.. that upset me.. no one asks to be molested and no one should judge a person on how they dress.. and i was 12 at the time.. grrrr.. oh well.. im gonna forget about it now anyways.. had to vent some where lol..
1 person likes this
@Erratic (724)
• Australia
20 Jun 08
There are some strange people out there. I see nothing wrong with your avatar, or the old one you had. And yes, no-one asks to molested. I think you found a sicko. Just ignore him.
@SusanLee (1920)
• United States
8 Jun 08
It doesn't bother me. I don't expect people to agree with me, especially in the religious forum, or about spanking children, and capital punishment. We all have very strong feelings in these areas and some people are more passionate than others. If controversy bothered me, I wouldn't go into those areas to start with. Now depending on my mood, I can get in a snit just as fast as the next person, but I can't blame them. I'm a grown woman and no one is making answer or start those posts.
1 person likes this
@Erratic (724)
• Australia
8 Jun 08
All good point. Thanks for sharing them.
• India
8 Jun 08
To me personally a comment is just their view on my ideas . I don't want everyone to have the same views as i do , you can actually become better if there are critics out there.Remember life is just a journey without a destination . with regards www.chocolatesavy.com
@Erratic (724)
• Australia
8 Jun 08
Good point. Thanks.
8 Jun 08
I thought it was hilarious when some user who shall not be named started having a go at me because I asked a question about mylot that was in the small print when I joined. They actually took the time to search through mylot and add dodgy comments to all of my discussions and even told me off for not replying to people's comments within a few days. They were on mylot every day, all day, and racked up a huge score and criticized my low score and slow progress. I stopped using mylot for a bit when their comments got extreme but they seem to have gone now.
1 person likes this
@Erratic (724)
• Australia
8 Jun 08
Welcome back! Unfortunately it doesn't matter what you do there will always be a dork around that wants to spoil your fun.
@kaezy_kulet (2465)
• Philippines
10 Jun 08
i answer then the way they have answered me then thats the end of the conversation.
1 person likes this
• United States
10 Jun 08
i only get upset is i get personally attacked and called ignorant or something.. i dont care if people think different than me but dont try to start something with me.. so far i havent had this prob but on livejournal there were several groups that you couldnt post anything with out being attacked.. the religious ones were the worst.. the wiccan group would attack newbies saying they were posers and then attack people if they had a broad view of the religion that included things that arent by the book saying they werent honest about it.. it was awful but there were post here and there that were worth staying in the group but i felt bad for anyone new on there
@gemini_rose (16194)
8 Jun 08
I have not had bad upsets on here, just sometimes I get the odd comment that is meant to be a dig. I just laugh at it and ignore it. I do not see the point of getting riled up about it, it is pointless. I just cannot be bothered trying to argue on a computer. So I never take anything personally I just let it go over my head.