Why cant I find a real friend
June 25, 2008 10:20pm CST
Why is it so hard to find a real friend? I mean I have friends I just dint have that one friend that I could just tell anything and they willn't judge me. You know that friend that just will do anything for you no matter what. I meet new people and start to think wow this is the one and nope they are just lairs,back stabbers so on. I just mess having that friend around where its just fun to hang with,i can just be myself, be stupid with, laugh about anything. Its been a very long time since I have had a friend like that. Man it seems like everyone I meet is so fake. They act one way in front of me and then when other people come around they act so rude and a totally different person. I just want someone to be them self in front of me,not be rude,understand that im a mother and a wife, so yeah sometimes I have to break are plans. I just cant help it. I want someone to be there for me like I would be there for them, understand that Im complixed but simple all in one.Love to go shopping but not spend alot of money,someone that doesn't try to out shine me,(im not in a comation with you)makes me laugh and is there when I need to cry,someone that will let me vent and not say anything,I have always tryed my best to be there for my friends but its like one time I cant just drop my whole crazy mess of a life they don't turn there backs on me. Is there anyone out there like this? I guess not I haven't found them yet. I hope one day I will find someone
• United States
26 Jun 08
Here is your really fried. You can always come to me for anything and talk to me about anything. I leave it up to you. I know you need to talk. I have heard the closed door arguments with B, and I know you need to vent so here I am. Love MOM
26 Jun 08
yes,i have the same feeling as you,it's difficult for me to find a real friend.nowaday,most people become fake.i dare not trust others easy.but i still believe nice people are in everywhere.you will have a real friend someday.maybe tomorrow or next month... it's important to know who is real friend instead of look for real friend.i think if you know what kind of criteria require from a real friend you can chose your real friend. the meaning of friend is not to find some one to chat but it's sense of behave some of the people that you life feel happy with them. in my opinion real friend is some one, who can feel you,listening you,advice you,give you help when you need.not only expect him/her to give you hand when you are in trouble,but even if you are contented situation,he can tell you any effecting you may have.realy it's difficult to recognise a good friend since you don't know what is a good person.
• United States
27 Jun 08
Sometimes it takes years to run across that one person who you love and trust unconditionally. I always had and do have more acquaintances than actual friends. People tend to use me because they think I am their personal banker. I am not rich but very comfortable. Within the last year I have really become close friends with a female just a little younger than myself. She has kids and now a grandchild so we have alot in common. I met her through another friend, who I thought was a close friend and actually turns out she was using me. I like my personal space so this friendship is perfect. She works, I work. She lives in my area as well. I've been friends with a gal since first grade. She lives in another state so we only see each other once a year. We are still very close but it's not the same as having a good friend in town. I spend as much time as possible with our now grown kids but I certainly understand why you feel the need to have a friend who will not judge you, use you or try to compete with you. Consider me your friend but you have to remember I am entering the fossil years so that makes me an official old broad..lol Have a great day, carolbee
26 Jun 08
Yes, ofcourse there is!in time you can find a real friend that will understand you in any ways of your life, But for now i have some tips for you to learn and you can practice in this life,Because every people that you meet is a stranger to you, right'same with this people. And it is understandable that we cannot expect that this people can treats us the way we expect too for the first time, although'some people could, but some people will not treat us the way they we want too. And we have no control about it. You mention also that many people are fake and rude, yeah' but not all. So for the fake and rude people that you meet i would say that the best medicine for that is to be True to them,be patient,kind, sweet and speak with a low and good tone of voice, Because their is no argument will accur with in any situation if u answer them with a very nice low tone. This people will see that you are so lovely after of all the conversation that you had with them. You may enlight this people to open up his/her mind to a good life and how to deal in correctly to every people.Because we/ourslves is a role model and we are responsible to a proper dealing. Because the way you deal and treat them that the way is the way will put it back in the next time that you meet them again.Because in every uniqueness that we show thats the things they will remember about you. And about searching a true friend may not occur in one day its a long process to gain a true friendship. You cannot find in it within in a week or month,you cannot find it just talking and telling all you story and talking or chatting about the life others, you cant find it giving some tips or some knowledges.Because Friendship is a like a processing, you have to process it,at first it mustbe a compatibility that you like each other to be a friend with each other, it s very good that you like each other then this is the start, calling each other is sign that you are craving with her friendship, Secondly in this you may show some caring like saying,Take Care Always, God Bless You and you and your Family, saying I LOve You My Friend, I always care for you, Your my sweet friend. See How this words will work after a long years when she look Back how beautiful the friendship that you have. In This way Their is Friendship Building, You are Building a good foundation that your friend may not forget you, the third step is hanging out like eating,watching movies,doing funny things and have fun. in this step make things that you friend cant forget you. show the best care and kindness that you can show. Because this are the unique things that she/he cant leave you no matter what. as you are Building as a friends for life in time dont chat a any sad or bad story Beacuse its a hindrance for a good and fun life just talk about happy things, a fun, a lovely things, be sweet to your friend. But As !1 Year or 2 years past and you think you build it correctly you will see how beautiful your friendship that you create and how it will work even a long time past and she/he will still search you to reach you even she/he is out of the country. Because even you didnt tell them any story about your bad life if theres any as she knows for a years she will know if you are sad. She herself will ask you Friend is there any problem you are not like that,is there anything i can help please tell i'll listen? If you build it correctly,their is a sweet fruit that will earn,will its a helping hand,kindness,Care, yes of all the things that you have done it will be given unto you. Because you plant it right,Thats is a happy friendship.