tough love

Trinidad And Tobago
July 1, 2008 7:31pm CST
why is it soo hard to let go of a long term relationship that was soo sweet for the first few years even though it is causing you more pain than child labour now. Is it because because as a woman i love to hard or is it that i am just afraid of change. Iwould really like to know, help please!!!
1 person likes this
6 responses
@snowy22315 (47045)
• United States
2 Jul 08
I think it's always hard to let go of a relationship even when it's not so good. Old habits are hard to break and emotional attachements are even more difficult to break. Relationships you have been in for a long time are probably the most difficult to break.
1 person likes this
@subha12 (18453)
• India
2 Jul 08
try to identify the real problem lyimg beneth it. is it just the reason taht you are afraid. or there is something that you are worrying too much. i think you need some talking with your partner.
@fiona08 (454)
• United States
2 Jul 08
I think it is hard for several reasons. You have invested a lot of heart into the relationship. Also a lot of time and effort. And when things used to be good, there is a sense of mourning for what once was. If it is over though, I just want to say, you will be happier once you have moved on. I dug my heels in for a couple of years after things went bad (of course there were nearly 25 years invested in that relationship). But when I finally decided it was time, and we separated, I actually felt a huge relief. Of course there is still a sense of loss, but it is not a loss I could get back, because the love is really gone. The relief is due to the fact, I can now be true to me. I can go on and find real love again, hopefully. And I can stand on my own. Change is hard, but sometimes it is necessary for growth. Good luck!
• Australia
2 Jul 08
i think its more to the point that if you have spent so much time with the particullar person you seem to fall into a rut/habbit to speak that its hard to turn over a new and start again.
• Indonesia
2 Jul 08
I have the same problem as yours. It is hard being a woman, we tend to think with our heart other than our brain. I too should get some changes in my life, but something keeps holding me back. Hang on lovely.
• Lubbock, Texas
2 Jul 08
I'm sure that a lot of people can give you a technical answer, but simply, you remember the beginning and you hope things will go back to being that way. When you're ready to let go of the ideal of pure true love, you'll be able to either let go of the relationship, or smack you partner hard enough to get his attention and tell him to shape up! That sounds a little flip, but I don't mean to make light of your situation. I just hope it doesn't take you as long to resolve your situation as it did me.