Why do I feel like this?
July 2, 2008 6:10pm CST
Ok so here is my situation. I am 20 years old and currently I am seeing a 49 year old whom I meet at work. When I got into this relationship with him we had this understanding that he did not want a boyfriend grilfriend relationship because he just got out of a bad relationship with his ex wife. Oh the same note I did not want that type of relationship either because I was in school and just started my career. Plus, there is this huge age difference between us. So, basically we are friends with benifits I guess you want to say. It started off with us talking on the phone alot and hanging out with one another having fun. But, the more I spend time with him the more I feel lonly because I do in a way want a relationship. Like the last two months we havent been together or talking like we use to and to be quite frank I am hurt by it. The sad thing is that I do care for him. But, I do relize that we are just friends. Ok why am I feeling so lonly for? I never really had anyone who took an intrest in me but in the same way I want a relationship. Does anyone have any suggestions for me on what I should do?
1 person likes this
• Quezon City, Philippines
3 Jul 08
Well I guess its better that you stay in that space as the man is still in healing process. Sometimes when you enter into a relationship you should be sure that the person you want to be in is ready emotionally, meaning he is not hrting over past relationships. Why? Because you are not really sure that when he enters yours it may just be an excuse for him to forget his past but that is not a solution to solve his healing process. Allow some more time until he is ready to love you truly.
2 Jul 08
If I were in your situation I would talk to him about it. Tell him how you feel and if he does not feel the same then tell him it has to stop so that you can move onto someone that wants what you want. I know how you feel I am very much like you, I like my space so I do not enter many relationships but if I have a friend with benefits as it is called I end up getting attached and hurt if they do not want anything more. Good luck sweety Hugs StrawberryKisses
• United States
2 Jul 08
I'll tell you what you should do. Go to the video store right now and rent the movie Shopgirl. I know it sounds crazy, but just do it. You'll understand once you watch it or if you have seen it already. I think the problem is that you probably don't have much in common with the man that you're NOT dating. Possibly, you're also feeling a little bit used by this relationship. Yes, he's shown an interest in you, but that's as far as it's going. This relationship has nowhwere to grow, based on your description, and perhaps you already know that on some level. Just my guess and I hope you find someone who fulfills *all* of your needs, rather than just your needs for attention and affection.