Do you give advice to someone even if they never asked for it?

@wachit14 (3600)
United States
August 7, 2008 2:03pm CST
Years ago I joined a mother's group when my kids were very young. We would meet in groups, but we had to follow certain guidelines, one of which was not giving advice to another member if they didn't ask for it first. This taught me a valuable lesson and made me realize that sometimes I would give advice to someone and preface it with "you should.....". I realized that the advice might not be appreciated and I find that I have restrained myself from giving unsolicited advice to this day. Do you find that you give advice to people even if they don't ask for it? Do people do that to you and if so, do you welcome the advice or resent that they are telling you what you should do without you having asked in the first place?
2 people like this
5 responses
@greenline (14864)
• Canada
7 Aug 08
This depends on the situation. Normally I wouldn't like to be an interference in other people's matters. But, if I see a very critical situation which would be very detrimental to the person, then I would give him/her the best advice I have. And, I would appreciate if people give the best advice too under those circumsatances.
1 person likes this
@wachit14 (3600)
• United States
7 Aug 08
I would have to agree with you that when I see a person in serious distress (meaning a family member or a friend) I would step in because I believe they just aren't thinking clearly at that point. That might be the only time I would interfere.
1 person likes this
@chandu245 (647)
• India
7 Aug 08
Actually it's all depends upon the situation because if any body wants advice to their problems or to their work then we can give easily, but whenever any body means friend is having very serious matter and he is thinking but not getting any idea then we can give advice. From that advice he may come out of that tense or he may get solution from my advice that he didn't get earlier.
@skenthal (1022)
• Turkey
7 Aug 08
lol i really give advices much especially when i m drunk lol i be like talking always when i get drunk little bit and after some time we start to talk more philosophical then advices start to come i know most of them looks stupid when i talk but sometimes 1 or 2 wise sentences come out from my mouth :)
1 person likes this
• United States
9 Aug 08
What an excellent discussion topic!!! I generally hate it when people try to give me advice, especially my brother because he takes it VERY personally if you don't immediately act on it! Plus, his advice is always so friggin' complicated! You need a written instruction manual to follow his advice!!! As far as giving other people advice goes, if they are not asking for advice but just complaining I will give them advice because that usually will shut them up. Sometimes I will give advice even if they haven't asked for it when they are talking about something that I have had experience with and found a workable solution, but it's not like I'm saying 'here is what you should do' it's more like 'here is something that worked for me, is it something you can use?'. But anytime I give advice, whether asked for or not, I am basically offering helpful suggestions that may or may not appeal to the person, and I have learned from my brother's example NOT to take it personally if my ideas do not interest them! After all, nobody else knows you like you do, so how can they know what will work for you??
• Canada
8 Aug 08
The only time I really remember giving someone advice when hey dind't ask or it was last week, and it was a good thing!! A friend of mine announced her engagement, and we wee talking about weddig plans. My unsolicited wedding advice was o talk o her fiance and do what THEY WANED TO DO, not o le others give them advice and try to inflence them. I suppose that was more encouagement than "unsolicited adice," but she appreciated it, either way. I hate getting unsoliced advice, so I won't be one to GIVE it either.