Arrogance..... Is it a cover for insecurity?

@James72 (26833)
Australia
August 20, 2008 1:14pm CST
we have all dealt with people that are arrogant at one time or another. As for myself, I certainly consider myself to be very confident in some areas but not arrogant! Arrogance to me is the feeling of superiority at the expense of others and I do honestly feel that many people that are arrogant are actually hiding inner insecurities. Are you in agreement with me or do you think my beliefs are wrong?
4 people like this
12 responses
@mimpi1911 (25467)
• India
21 Aug 08
Hi James I agree to you partially. In most cases arrogance develops from childhood. It takes under whatever environment he is into and also family and genetic backgrounds. So, clearly, it's above superiority or inferiority compelexes. I mean, a child doesn't bore well defined self esteems in that period in time. He is still to develop it. However, having said this, some people develop this arrogance just to cover up their unsecurities in life. Like someone affected would start to shout and create a gross environment even before he's being pointed out of his folly! Now, this is certainly hiding the inner insecurities, failures. Thanks.
2 people like this
@James72 (26833)
• Australia
21 Aug 08
Partially agreeing is good! lol. Yes I agree with you also that this type of behaviour most definitely stems from childhood. Sometimes the most unlikely of events or experiences can directly or indirectly shape many of our traits as an adult. If you were TRULY confident in yourself then you would arguably not feel the desire to be arrogant around others just to prove it! Thanks for responding.
@mimpi1911 (25467)
• India
21 Aug 08
James you made a valid point when you say: If you were TRULY confident in yourself then you would arguably not feel the desire to be arrogant around others just to prove it! Very well said. BTW, can I use it elsewhere as a quotaion or it is copyrighted. lol...
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@James72 (26833)
• Australia
21 Sep 08
Use as a quotation at will mimpi! Just be sure to credit the author!
@cbreeze (1209)
• United States
21 Aug 08
I think arrogance is definitely a sign of insecurity. Many people mask their short comings with arrogance. Sometimes, however, I think we misread confidence for arrogance and maybe that's our own insecurities playing out. Maybe at times other people's confidence makes us insecure and uncomfortable so we blame it on them by labeling them as arrogant.
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@James72 (26833)
• Australia
21 Aug 08
Yes I agree with both of your points. The insecurity DOES work both ways in many instances. Thanks for responding.
• United States
21 Aug 08
Very perceptive cbreeze! I love you already!!
1 person likes this
@mefadon3 (299)
• United States
21 Aug 08
I totally agree with you. I have been accused of arrogance in the past, but it is because people confuse confidence with arrogance. I don't downplay what God has gifted me with and I don't think people are less than I am. If you feel good about yourself and people around you don't then those people may view you as arrogant.
@James72 (26833)
• Australia
21 Aug 08
Someone who is confident will share their knowledge with others yet still assert themselves as a mentor; those that are arrogant will not always share their knowledge but will make every effort to make sure that they know what YOU don't! Thanks for responding.
• United States
20 Aug 08
I guess I can be pretty supercilious, and I certainly have been harboring some insecurity. And I would rather be haughty than meek and humble that's for sure, but I would like to be a little more 'allowing' of the perceived 'shortcomings' of others, rather than looking down my nose so disdainfully at all you mere mortals.
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@James72 (26833)
• Australia
21 Aug 08
"Supercilious" is too big a word for me to start my morning with zigzgbuddha..... Try to tone it down a bit for me next time yes? No words of over 8 letters until AFTER 11 am OK? lol. Personally I would like to at least be empathetic I guess rather than haughty or meek! Being humble I think we all need to be every now and then as well. Thanks for responding.
1 person likes this
• United States
21 Aug 08
I just was trying to avoid the word arrogant, but you can substitute that word if you like. There is no value in feeling another's pain along with him. Nor is a view of yourself as lowly and insignificant going to accomplish much. I am a double Aries born in the year of the Dragon... in other words I am fiery, aggressive, arrogant, and 'bigger than life'... it would be an act of extreme self-denial for me to pretend otherwise.
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@James72 (26833)
• Australia
21 Aug 08
Well I was born on the cusp of Cancer and Leo so I guess I am a "crabby lion"! lol.
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• Australia
21 Aug 08
I'm going with arrogance = attention seeker + a$$hole. Arrogance is a choice, the same as humour and sarcasm are, and to me, its inbred. Sarcasm = humour + 'the inner child' + charisma.[ok, poetic licence, but close enough]. With both arrogance and sarcasm, you can build a wall to keep others away, both have different affects. Sarcasm, like humour, tends to bring people together, everyone loves taking the mickey, aussies live for it i reckon.. Arrogance is a character weakness, people wanting attention or power often feel the need to dictate, belittle and dominate......what was the question again?
@James72 (26833)
• Australia
21 Aug 08
Ah! Praise to the Sultan! I would have to agree that most of the arrogant people I have met are indeed a@@holes. Sarcaasm at least opens up a thrilling exchange between two intellectuals if the circumstances are right; yet arrogance is considerably one sided. As for the question? Who gives a rat's a@@..... Thanks for responding.
1 person likes this
• United States
21 Aug 08
Jesus! Getting a little moody James? Have I just been called an a$$hole - behind my back even?!?
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@James72 (26833)
• Australia
21 Aug 08
Lol. It was YOU that said you were arrogant not me zigzagbuddha! I will need a little more time yet to say once and for all if you are an a@@hole!
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@skenthal (1022)
• Turkey
21 Aug 08
snob - cartoon of a arrogant man
absolutely. arrogant people are ridiculous and are very insecure. there is a difference between arrogance and confidence. i have no problem with confidence but when i talk to an arrogant person (who talks so much thinking they know anything and everything and who are so demanding) i just want to punch them. i have few friends like that and they are so funny to hang out with because i know all they do is lie and make up stuff to impress friends.
1 person likes this
@James72 (26833)
• Australia
21 Aug 08
Yes they can definitely be bordering on ridiculous the way they carry themselves sometimes! A confident persoanlity is at least tolerable..... Oh and by the way, from my own experience, punching arrogant people doesn't seem to do much good for some reason?? I am not sure why but they just don't seem to like it! lol. Thanks for responding.
@successlog (3174)
• China
21 Aug 08
hello James72 I think it is inevitable to be arrogant to a person if he has ths superior skills on some area.we know some one who has the superb skill aleays feel no one can reach to him.so he always be arrogant.But It is sure he is helpful and useful to other people. so if people know his skills would feel secure around him. of course, there are some ones who only be arrogant without any genuine skills.maybe at the first time, second...some ones will believe in him.But after several tests,people would know he is a dishonest man with insecurity,only to be arrogant himself.It is only my opinion. good luck
@James72 (26833)
• Australia
21 Aug 08
This is an interesting statement..... I feel personally that there are definitely some areas that I do have superior skills over many others in; and I am known for the same. Yet rather than be arrogant at the expense of others, I am confident in my ability and people know this also! There is a difference between the two. In my opinion, arrogance has negative connotations but being confident does not. And yes, I do agree that people that are arrogant do stand a strong chance of being seen as transparent eventually! Thanks for responding.
@alokn99 (5719)
• India
21 Aug 08
James, I think you are right to a very large extent. I've encountered a lot of arrogant people, and on my extended observations of them, I have noticed that the arrogance stems from their insecurities. It's thier way of trying to convince themselves that they are in control. Having said this , I also wonder if sometimes our own insecurities or weaknesses sometimes makes us wrongly judge people as being arrogant , when they may not really be ?
@James72 (26833)
• Australia
21 Aug 08
The word "control" is very valid here and I agree that this is exactly what arrogance can be about in many instances. As for your last point, our insecurities for sure will could our judgement as we may incorrectly make assumptions about others just to try to convince ourselves that we are better than they are. Which is actually quite hypocritical really! We will state that someone is arrogant rather than acknowledge that they may actually be someone that is very proficient at what they do; which in turn is a soft sign of our own arrogance in dismissing their positive traits! Thanks for responding.
@richiem (3649)
• Philippines
21 Aug 08
I see myself as arrogant a lot of times. that means I really am insecure. Sometimes I would hear myself and see that I am not really being humble and I think it has something to do with being insecure. I don't know how to change it. Or maybe I am not really trying. Have a nice day!
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@James72 (26833)
• Australia
21 Aug 08
Well of course the first thing is that you have at least acknowledged your shortcomings! Someone who is truly arrogant would NEVER do such a thing so maybe you might be being just a little too harsh on yourself? By recognising this trait within yourself you are indeed trying already! The key is to believe in yourself and your capabilities and potential' but not to the point of having to see yourself as superior over others either. Thanks for responding.
@valeria1 (2724)
• United States
20 Aug 08
I see that all the time, and I am not arrogant at all I am confident as you are I know what I know and if I do not know I will ask! I do not know if you perceive that even in myLot you have this kind of people, that makes others in here less, did you see this before?
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@James72 (26833)
• Australia
21 Aug 08
Oh I definitely see people in herelike the ones you are referring to. They pretty much exist in any group! Confodence can sometimes be misread by people that do not know us well enough so arrogance is an immediate assumption. I am someone also that is not afraid to admit if I do not know something! Many people think that to do this is a sign of weakness; but it certainly is not! Thanks for responding.
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@DonnaLawson (4032)
• United States
20 Aug 08
According to Merriam-Webster Dictionary, arrogance is an attitude of superiority manifested in an overbearing manner or in presumptuous claims or assumptions. Sounds to me as if you are 100% correct.. There are many persons who cover insecurities with this type of behavior.. Even if there is a valid reason for them to behave this way, such as the inner insecurities, you still look at many of them and think, "Loud-mouthed Idiot" or some such insult.. I know that I do, I can't stand to see or hear of someone being talked down to and this is the type of behavior that arrogant persons display.. I have tons of inner insecurities but have never been arrogant, or at least I hope not.. I have a certain amount of confidence but when I do feel insecure, I am still not the type of person who would intentionally hurt anyone, no matter what was going on inside.. I do believe quite a bit of it can be attributed to insecurity but we do still have a few who are still arrogant but do not have any insecurities, or at least any that they know of..
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@James72 (26833)
• Australia
21 Aug 08
Very nice response DonnaLawson! And thank you for the definition..... I myself have sometimes been referred to as arrogant by people that do not know me; yet once they DO get to know me they start to realise that I am not arrogant at all. Confident yes; but not arrogant. If I were to honestly diagnose myself, this initial "outsider" perception of me being arrogant is not insecurity, it is somewhat of a defence mechanism. I tend to keep people at a distance until such time as I learn to understand them and their motives I guess. And yes, there ared definitely those that are arrogant and not insecure at all. I have come across these types of people many times as well. Either way, arrogance is not a trait that I particularly enjoy encountering at all. Thanks for responding.
@NeoBug (106)
20 Aug 08
well. i go with your ideas i have seen many arogant persons around me, i felt that they were just hiding their insecurities just by being arrogant to others. they actually feel that their confused state wont be seen when they are like this to the persons around them. i would completely go with your idealogy..!
@James72 (26833)
• Australia
20 Aug 08
Great minds think alike then! lol. Thank you for the affirmation and also for your response.