In Love With More Than One Person At The Same Time???

United States
August 21, 2008 8:26pm CST
A friend of mine and I were talking the other day and she asked me this question, "Do you think it is possible to be in love with more than one person at the same time?". I gave her my opinion, which is, yes. I do believe that it is possible. I think there are so many different types of love and it carries over into relationships as well. I believe one person can offer you a type of love that another person can't. Every person has their own attributes different than another, which makes each love unique. Every time I've been in love it has been a different kind of love. I loved one man for one thing and I loved another guy for something totally different. I guess this is really a deep subject if you think about it. So, what is your opinion? Do you think it is possible to love more than one person at the same time?
3 people like this
18 responses
@utsadetti (4589)
• United States
22 Aug 08
Yes, it can happen! But i think we must a dare to make decision to choose one of them OR you will loose the two of them. Every person is not perfect, isn't it? And we do not always get all what we want.
• United States
24 Aug 08
That's true. We don't always get what we want. Thanks for the comment. Happy MyLotting!
• Malaysia
22 Aug 08
every person, comes with their own individual characters, i guess your friend must have liked different points in this different individual .. she has not found the person who comes with the package that she wants .. that is why she is torn between this people .. it is not wrong at all, as she is still in the midst of making her selection but she better make her selection fast, as guys too can get hurt like us woman, just imagine our man has 2 woman .. it will be hurtful ..for us when we find out .. if your boyfriend spends the night at one girls house and comes to see you next day , dont you feel bad ?? she has to weigh and balance between this people and choose the nearest ones .. otherwise she should let both go and wait for the one with the whole package to come along But maybe the word "love" is too strong for this relationship can i say ?? cheers
2 people like this
• United States
24 Aug 08
I agree, these situations can be hurtful. I have been in "relationships" where I knew the man I was dating was dating more than just me. I've known what it felt like to know he was with her one night and me the next. It was a situation that I didn't want to be in. Thanks for the comment. Happy MyLotting!
@subha12 (18453)
• India
22 Aug 08
May be it can be. but i guess it can never be something good.i have seen in some cases a guy made love with two girls. i do not know whether both were true love. but it messed up and ruine dlife of one person.
2 people like this
• United States
24 Aug 08
Yes, in this sort of situation, it can ruin lives. Thanks for the comment. Happy MyLotting!
@LadyMarissa (12160)
• United States
22 Aug 08
YES, until you find what I call True Love, it is possible to be in love with more than one person at the time. They both could have attributes that you love neither having ALL the attributes you need to find true love. Once you meet that one true love, you don't need anyone else. So, if you're in love with more than one, you have probably not found your one & only yet.
• United States
22 Aug 08
EXACTLY! I think you have hit the nail right on the head! That's exactly what I think too. Thanks for putting it into a "better" explanation than I did! Happy MyLotting!
@sid556 (31000)
• United States
22 Aug 08
I do think it is probably possible. I have heard others talk who have been in that situation. I am very faithful to whoever I'm with and while I might be attracted to another man, I've never let myself get involved so personally, I don't know. It sounds reasonable to believe it could happen. Many people who have affairs, find themselves very torn because they do really love their partners and also love the person they are having the affair with.
1 person likes this
• United States
24 Aug 08
Yes, there are some people who get torn between lovers. Personally, I've been involved with a married man before and I feel that he had STRONG feelings for me, but I also know that he loves his wife very much too. I never once suggested that he leave her or anything. I felt that if his love for me became stronger than his love for her then, maybe he would someday. I felt I gave him something that she couldn't give him and perhaps she gave him something that I couldn't give him. I've never cheated on any man I've been with though. I've always been faithful to the man I was with because I would want the same respect from him in return. Thanks for your comment! Happy MyLotting!
1 person likes this
@sid556 (31000)
• United States
25 Aug 08
i did the married man thing too...i was single. Actually the guilt got to both of us and we just broke it off. Their marriage did end a couple of years ago and I'm glad that I was not the cause. I do see him now off and on and we will always be great friends and the best part is that there is no guilt at all.
1 person likes this
@capirani (1841)
• United States
23 Aug 08
I absolutely do not believe it is possible if it is real love. Because real love is much more than feelings and emotions. It is a choice and that choice includes being faithful to that one person. I believe so much has been done to tear apart what real love is that this is one of the main reasons we have such problems with divorce, children born out of wedlock, single parenthood, etc. People think they are in love. But the real commitment that goes with real love just isn't there. They rush into physical intimacy, living together, marriage, all before they have really gotten out of that initial infatuational lust. To ask about being 'in love' with more than one person....that phrase 'in love' is a very special phrase and should not be used unless one has found that person they want to spend the rest of their lives with. Sometimes it doesn't work out that way because the other person isn't ready with that same commitment. I do believe one can be in love at different times with different people over the course of a lifetime. But I think if they believe they are in love with more than one at the same time, it isn't the long lasting real thing and one or the other or both will end up falling apart.
1 person likes this
• United States
24 Aug 08
You have a good point. Alot of times we do jump into intimacy, etc. We do get love and lust confused. Thanks for the comment. Happy MyLotting!
@Ithink (10488)
• United States
22 Aug 08
I think you can in around in about way, it isnt a whole consuming love thou like when you find "THE ONE". I think that people get confused as they can go from person to person so fast and dont realize everyone is different and has good and bad points. Even "THE ONE" has these. Even when you find "THE ONE" there is times where life can get boring or whatever and you can start wondering if there isnt more out there, just waiting for you. It is up to you as a person to have self control. I'm sorry I dont understand the ones that can have more then one, to me that is telling each that they arent worthy of your full commitment. I dont see how it can ever end up happy ever after, someone always gets hurt or is hurting and just doesnt admit it.
1 person likes this
• United States
24 Aug 08
I agree. Someone always gets hurt in the end. Thanks for the comment. Happy MyLotting!
• United States
22 Aug 08
Yes i do feel its possible. No one person is going to be perfect and everything that another person wants. I know when we meet them and we choose to marry someone, we often think they are EVERYTHING we want, but in sooo many cases (more cases than not) we find out that isnt the case...so in some cases we meet other people not with the intentions of falling in love, but maybe through friends just hanging out, and well we fall in lvoe because there is just somehting about that person that u are missing in the person at home. In my case i am in love with my husband, but also with a very good female friend of mine, so if you are in an alternative lifestyle such as being attracted to both male and females, its even more likely to happen.
1 person likes this
• United States
24 Aug 08
I can totally understand where you are coming from. I'm sure she has something to offer to you that he doesn't and that attracts you to her. But I'm sure he has qualities that attract you to him too. Thanks for the comment. Happy MyLotting!
@magojordan (3254)
• Philippines
22 Aug 08
In my opinion it is better to say that you can't love two people with the equal amount of love. Yes you may love two people at the same time but surely you don't give the same amount of love for both of them. Maybe you love the other more than the other or maybe you just feel sorry for the other because if you leave that person for another person then things would go bad. Love is always different depending on the person I agree with you on that point and of course you could only give the most of your love to one person.
• United States
24 Aug 08
I do believe sometimes that it is that you don't love one person but you don't want to hurt them either or want them to feel like you abandoned them. Thanks for the comment. Happy MyLotting!
• China
22 Aug 08
it's possible for man, hehe
1 person likes this
• United States
24 Aug 08
It's possible for a woman too. Happy MyLotting!
• United States
22 Aug 08
i loved more than 1 person at the same time. i have many best friends that are the opposite gender, and i love all of them for different reasons but the best way to discribe my feeling for them is love. but my for my girlfriend my love for her is different. but i love my chick friends too just not in a way i love her. and my first love will always be in my heart, but that dont mean i would give up my girlfriend for her. i cant just forget about everything i been threw and everything i learned from love in the past. im not sayin im in love with her still, its just she took my heart first. but im giving my girlfriend my heart now.
• United States
24 Aug 08
Yes, I think sometimes we do still love our past lovers too. It is hard not care about someone that you were so close to. Thanks for the comment! Happy MyLotting!
@coffeechat (1961)
• New Zealand
22 Aug 08
Torn between two lovers, feelin' like a fool Lovin' both of you is breakin' all the rules Torn between two lovers, feelin' like a fool Lovin' you both is breakin' all the rules These are the lyrics of a popular song by Mary McGregor which I guess struck a chord in such a broad group of people that the song topped the charts for weeks. Sure it is possible to love two people or for that matter, but unless one wants to be in a steamy situation that creates "lose - lose" scenarios all around its best to stick to the straight and narrow.
• United States
24 Aug 08
Yes, I think that those lyrics can strike a chord to alot of people. I do agree, when doing such things it can create a lose - lose scenario. Thanks for the comment! Happy MyLotting!
• Philippines
22 Aug 08
no i dont agree, you cant be in love with two persons at the same time, there are levels of love, and maybe it is not love and it is just infatuation or maybe lust, or maybe he is just dont really know what love is, if you are really inlove with one person, you cant be inlove with another, thats what i feel.....
• United States
24 Aug 08
I do agree that sometimes we confuse infactuation and lust with love. Thanks for the comment! Happy MyLotting!
@jaded22 (828)
• Philippines
22 Aug 08
Hi there, Yes, I think it is possible to love more than one person at the same time but never to the same degree. Good day!
1 person likes this
• United States
24 Aug 08
That's true. I think you always have more feelings for one than the other. Thanks for the comment! Happy MyLotting!
• Philippines
22 Aug 08
I believe it is a YES. We meet a lot of people everyday in our lives. As they come along, chances is we get to know each other well until such time that we unknowingly are falling for that person. Each and one of us has different qualities, characteristics, traits which we can't find all of what we are wanting from one person alone. Maybe that is why we still can't help ourselves loving more than one person at the same time.
1 person likes this
• United States
24 Aug 08
I agree totally. I have fallen for men that I never thought that I'd fall for. Thanks for the comment! Happy MyLotting!
• United States
22 Aug 08
yes!! deffinatly. you get different things fromdifferent people. and there are many qualities in people that you can fall in love with. you cant expect one person to possess everything you ever wanted in a person and it wouldnt be fair to expect that of someone.
1 person likes this
• United States
22 Aug 08
I agree totally. It is hard to believe that one person could have EVERY attribute that you want in someone. I hope one day that I do find someone like that, but I'm not sure if that will ever happen or if there is such a person out there like that. Thanks for your comment! Happy MyLotting!
@iakulchen (615)
• Singapore
22 Aug 08
No, defintely no. You can't be in love with more than one person at the same time. It's just that the switch between loving one of the two of them occurs over too short a period, and keeps switching, for you to realise that you aren't in love with two of them at the same time. To use computers as an example, computers can't do two things at the same time, they just appear to as they they keep switching between processing different tasks. Same for love. It's not loving two people at the same time.
1 person likes this
• United States
22 Aug 08
I see where you are coming from. Thanks for your comment! Happy MyLotting!
• Philippines
22 Aug 08
I agree with you, this is possible, in fact, anything is possible nowadays. I dig your explanation as well, we certainly can fall for different people at the same time since it isn't impossible that we find our ideals in different person. However, this doesn't mean that we are entitled to start love relationships with different people at the same time, that's a different story. Feeling is one thing, acting on the feelings is a different thing...
1 person likes this
• United States
22 Aug 08
Yes, I agree, "feeling is one thing, acting on the feelings is a different thing". Sometimes it is hard to control your feelings, but control is all apart of life. Thanks for your comment. Happy MyLotting!