i can understand why so many stay in a abusive relationship now

United States
October 7, 2008 9:01am CST
i can understand now why so many people end up back in a abusive relationship or never leave in the first place. it really is sad. my tenant, great friend, and neighbor is going through it. she finally kicked him out about 2 weeks ago or so. he calls all teh time. threatens her. drives up and down the road. they have a son who is mentally handicaped. he took the kid with no meds then brought him back a few days later with bruises all over his back side and a busted nose. she has called the cops. she has got restraining oreders, protective orders, went to the domestic voilence place everything. still he runs up and down the road, calling, threatening. she is scared and no one will help her. they say they will but when the catch up to him they never arrest him. he has warrents out too. its crazy. i dont understand. me and my husband have called on him. he came over to her house which is our place and starting threatening her. he tore up the yard with his truck and we pressed charges for destrusction and told them he is not allowed on our property here and still he continues and thy wont do anything. they talk about all this help and leave them if it happens to you and dont be one of the numbers get out. she does it and there is no help from the cops or anything. she has us but what are we. we can not make him stop. our great gvt at work. our great justice system hahaha. this is a nightmare. i can really understand now though when women or a man even states they cant get out.
1 person likes this
4 responses
@Thoroughrob (11750)
• United States
7 Oct 08
Alot of people feel they have nowhere to turn. It is sad, but true.
@fasttalker (2797)
• United States
7 Oct 08
It is a very sad situation. I have gone through it with a sister of mine. It takes persistence that is unbelievable and a very strong support system. We went through calling the police and filing charges on him for 2 years before he was finally arrested (3 times within 6 months) and gave the fight up. A lot of times people get tired of the battle and end up back in the situation because it is easier than fighting. It will take its toll. And everyone around you has all the answers (they think)when they don't have a clue what they are talking about. My advice is to be strong and if you have to call the police every hour then do it. They will get tired of it after a while and they will put the hammer down on him. My sister finally ended up moving away totry to get some relief from it and it worked for the most part. Good Luck and hang in there!
7 Oct 08
Well, when you are in an abusive realtionship it takes a lot of strenght to get the courage to leave. I was there once and it's hard. Especially when you have no one to turn to and no where to go. It took me 4 years to get out the abusive relationship I was in. When I did get the courage and strenght to get out my whole life turned around. People in these types of relationships need support. If you don't have support it makes getting out so much harder. I was lucky to have a friend that was there for me when I was ready. I have been with this angel now for 11 years and we have been married for a year and a half. It was because of his support and friendship that made me realize I deserved better. He was right and every day I thank god for bringing him into my life. I have to move an hour away and hide to find peace. He sounds like my ex. I feel for her. This is not something that is easy to go through. The legal system doesn't do much and sometimes nothing. Be supportive to your friend. I hope she finds the strenght to get away from him and eventually be happy. We all deserve to be happy.
@1hopefulman (33405)
• Canada
7 Oct 08
It's sad when one ends up with one of these monsters, but they exist, as we can see.