staying together for the kids

October 14, 2008 6:08am CST
Do you think that is you are your partner and having some promlems you should spit or stay together and try and sort it out for the kiddies? Personaly i think that if there is a way to sort it then sort it and try to make it work. Of corse if there is no way to get backon trak then what would you do? what do you think would be best for the children? I suppose it depends on the whole situation but one thing i am sure of is that the childs needs should come first, do what is best for the child. what are your views on this?
9 responses
• China
15 Oct 08
If you insist on your opinion, you will not divoice with your husband.But how do you feel? You will sink into distrublement. In fact, many people think just like you. They remain a family for kids. However, what about you?
15 Oct 08
Well this is not about me it is something i said to friend as we fell out over it and just wonderd if other people see it for my point of view. persnaly if i had problems with my partner i would try and sort them befor ending it all, if they cant be sorted then yes go your seperate ways but i would not end it without atleast trying
@kedves (728)
14 Oct 08
It depends on so many things. how old are the children, how tempestuous is the relationship between you, how would you arrange split and division of child care ... it is not an easy thing to determine. yes the important thing is the children but do you stay in abusive relationship for them? do you stay if the fights are loud and wakes them? if they are babies or teens it may be easier to leave .. in between then it takes a lot of courage a lot of soul searching and a lot of understand and acceptance but above all it has to take a lot of agreement between you both.
14 Oct 08
i would never think it is wright to stay n and abusive relationship for the kids weather it is phisical or mental or even just verbal. the children pick up on more of there things than you realise.
• United States
22 Oct 08
It depends on the situation. If a couple is not happy then the kids will definitely pick up on that. They are smarter than we think. I think if a couple stays together for the kids sake, that may not be a good enough reason. I have known some kids whose parents have divorced later in life and the kid is now an adult and found out they only stayed together because of them and it made the kid feel bad because their parents weren't really happy. An unhappy person makes and unhappy family. Of course, if it can be worked out it needs to be mutual, but sometimes people just make mistakes. Any kind of abuse is unacceptable and I think a person does not have to put up with that at all.
@tessmom (16)
• Nigeria
15 Oct 08
why do people jump quickly into devorce when things start working the other way. see the reason why byou should stay with your spouse is because you love him. not because of the children the children can still be disappointed and still be the same if you are devorced. because you guys pretend you are still together but without love. love defects all thing. it does not record wrong. all you have to do is work things out. and be together again. all some irresponsible couples think of is how to break the marriage that god has call for better for worse.becaues they noticed a weakess in the spouse that is rubbish. love is the anwser and God is love.
@mayrah (1037)
• Philippines
15 Oct 08
hello cathywigg, well personally, I think if there's no more love between the partners, the best remedy for them is separation, they must go with their own separate ways. Because staying together just for the sake of their kids could just worsen the situation. Because the question is, what if they cannot anymore bear each other? and all they can do together is to fight even when their children was there. And by separation they still both accountable and responsible for the welfare of their kids, The father must give financial support and the mother must live with the kids.
@TessWhite (3147)
• United States
15 Oct 08
I stayed with my husband for my son's sake. Big mistake. Son was as miserable as we were. Finally when my son was a late teen I said enough and we divorced. I don't think people should stay married just for the children. Children are smart and pick up on these things and often are stressed from it as well. If it doesn't work, its best to end it.
@despompa (472)
• Philippines
15 Oct 08
if i am trapped in this situation, id rather let go than stay for the child's sake. i think its not helpful nor healthy to continue living in the house with your husband if you think the relationship you have with him will not work no matter how casual or civil you treated each other.its best to go on separate ways while you still have the respect for each other. besides, it will be the child who will suffer most.
• Puerto Rico
15 Oct 08
problems will always be there in a marriage thats the way life is but even though you both are thinking of the children do whats best for all try working things out with your best see whats going wrong and try to fix the situacion but if it gets to a point that it can't be fixed what my opinion is that when the childre are old enough to understad things in life you should explain to them whats going on and go your seperate ways its not fair that your children grow up knowing and seeing there parents are not happy together you both may go seperate ways but make things right and even though you both may seperate ,become good friends for the best of everything and everything will work for the better sooner or later the truth will reveal and maybe sometimes if you wait to long things may get worst than it is
• Canada
14 Oct 08
I think that if you are in a relationship where you are not happy and neither partner is happy then the children will not be happy. If you are in an abbusive relationship then you need to get out right away! Children are to be the main concern in any relationship.