When do you stop helping your son?

@Jenaisle (3803)
Philippines
November 22, 2008 7:32pm CST
Would stop all support after age 18? or do you go on as long as he needs it. I truly believe that as parents, there should be not limits to how we can help our children even after they're 18, even if they have jobs and even if they are married already. What do you think? What are your thoughts on this?
1 person likes this
8 responses
• India
30 Nov 08
as early as 18 is good he should b able to learn on how to live on his own 2 feet soon!
@ronaldinu (12440)
• Malta
30 Nov 08
What do you mean by help? Financial help? Emotional help? I do believe that once you are a parent you are a parent for a lifetime. Children do become independent at the age of sixteen or eighteen but they still need our help or advice even if they are a grown up. © ronaldinu 2008
@jillhill (37383)
• United States
23 Nov 08
Since my kids are grown and married....well I still help them as much as I can if they need it. My son is married and they both work and are going to school full time. If they need it I buy books etc for their education or help with the little one when I can. I think you never stop being a parent.....it's a job for life and when they need you.....that's what you are there for.
@jonesy123 (3950)
• United States
23 Nov 08
Support and help is relative. Being a parent doesn't stop, but how much you parent will change over time. Somebody who is 18, even married with kids, still needs more parental support then somebody who is lets say 30. That is if all goes well. However, there may be times where more emotional and even financial support is needed even if the person is 50. That's just what parents do. That said, it needs to be within reason. Obviously, an 18 year old needs to learn independence, and that includes making your own mistakes. But a parent should be there to provide positive feedback and support. But if the same person continues to make the same mistakes over and over again and is now 30... well, eventually some tough love is needed.
@nilzerous1 (2435)
• India
23 Nov 08
In our country it is a common practice to guide and supervise sons even when they are 40+ something; and not only parents but also senior family members stand by their side or support them if required. Earlier, words of senior family members used to be paid more values than any Hon'ble court, and they used to offer the last word. Now with wide spread network of nuclear family, the picture has changed to some extent, still, there is some form of respect towards senior members. And parents have concern for their kids. I believe you can not put upper age limit on this concern. Parents will naturally take care and support their sons/daughters in every form whenever required as this is the basis of social bondage, social responsibility and social survival.
@ANTIQUELADY (36488)
• United States
23 Nov 08
i didn't know u ever stopped helping them if they need help. my sons both have good jobs so they never ask for money [they know i don't have any lol] but i would help them anyway i could. i wish they needed me more than they do sometime.
@fwidman (11515)
• United States
23 Nov 08
Once they reached eighteen, all of my four sons knew that was the end of the road as far as monetary support goes. They had to get out on their own and get jobs, or join the service or something. This they all did, willingly, and now have families and lives of their own to take care of I would support them emotionally, but that's about it. If they were in dire straights, that would be different, but they all have good jobs and make more money than I do. Maybe they can help me
@genihanna (358)
• United States
23 Nov 08
Being a parent is forever - it does not stop at age 18. If your kids don't have you to depend on, who do they have? Sure, you might have raised them to be more self-sufficient or independent, but maybe not. What difference should that make? Your child is your child FOREVER!