Concept of What a Family Is
@bantilesroger (341)
Philippines
January 11, 2009 5:01am CST
Our concept of what a basic family unit is composed of has certainly expanded in recent years. Some societies now accept - or at least tolerate - the idea that a family may be composed also of two men or of two women living together as "husband" and "wife," (who may or may not have children adopted or brought from a previous and separate union/s), or a single parent raising a child.
What social, psychological, religious, economic, even political and bio-physical phenomena do you think have brought this about? Do you think this is for good? Who would be the role models of the children raised in a family of the same gender? How would the role models be chosen, and how would it be acted out?
10 people like this
21 responses
@23uday (2997)
• India
12 Jan 09
Hi frnds,
My family concept was nice,friendly nature always,positive mind's.
In my family were social workers also helping to others when they needed.I want
a good environment in my home.A family means a good,friendly nature,helping to others.Have a nice day.
1 person likes this
@se7enthbird (8307)
• Philippines
12 Jan 09
i think it does not depend on what gender but on how you raise the kids. i have a friend who is a single mother of four children. they ran away from home and left her husband there. he is a very abusive person and only thinks of himself. as of now she is still single and works real hard to be a good model for her children even without a father figure. i think it all depends on how gppd you are on raising your children.
@cupid74 (11388)
• Pakistan
12 Jan 09
Hi dear
very controvercial discussion
i wonder if i can use my input here or not as to me family is unit, mean for the positive growth of Society by giving birth to kids, raise them in vivilized manner, accordance to norms of relegion, social and ethical mannars
Take care
1 person likes this
@Opal26 (17679)
• United States
12 Jan 09
Hi bantilesroger! I don't think that there necessarily needs
to be a "role" model of the same gender to be chosen. As long
as the children are being raised in a loving home environment
and are being taught to respect themselves and others I think
that is basically the most important things that a family would
need to teach. Anything else I feel will be learned as they
grow up and participate in the world as others do and become
part of their school, community and the rest of their family.
1 person likes this
@bing28 (3795)
• Philippines
12 Jan 09
Actually what we understand of the family is the mother, father and children, all living together, Now however, others consider everyone who love, respect and care for each other and living with harmonious relationship, a family. Someone who has to go home with or feel belong may call them a family.
1 person likes this
@maygodblessu44 (7336)
• India
11 Jan 09
Hello my friend bantilesroger ji,
To response from bottom of my heart, the word family means 'Husband and wife' , so let's full-fill the requirement first, new era giving birth to living together of same gender would not suffice its true meaning. A family must have husband and wife of opposite gender, which is a natural phenomena. how do you accept it, is one's way of thinking. Everyone here is free to think and do in its own ways, something new , which has never been done earlier, to find suitable place in records. Why do we not follow natural things. Why to go un-natural. it is because some people want to get themselves satisfied in their own ways. It is time to come. may god bless everyone to live natural ways. have a graet time.
@lovespecialangel (3632)
• United States
12 Jan 09
Are you saying that single parenting is bad also? Not every family needs to be made up of a husband and a wife.
1 person likes this
@maygodblessu44 (7336)
• India
13 Jan 09
Hello my dear lovespecialangel Ji,
If you permit me to think that way, we are all born to our parents, who were husband and wife in their relation, who brought us up. This concept is general and not in particular, when I think, I am just talking in general, not with lot of imrovements. It has been established facts taht mothers take better care than fathers, so complete nursing/hospitability is with females around the globe. I am of this view. We have to pick up some studies where, either of the gender alone/samegenders together/and opposite genders have been instrumental in parenting and wait till last to complete findings. Find out which one has been better. I do not deny others thinking, I appriciate, similary I expect others to think about my way of thinking. may god bless you and have a great time.
@laglen (19759)
• United States
10 Feb 09
I don't think the family is so much a matter of how many people but more of the relationship. A family to me, is a support system whether there is a mom and dad, two moms, two dads, one parent. Sometimes a family with one parent is better than two.
@sarahruthbeth22 (43143)
• United States
10 Feb 09
This a permanent change.What the conservatives don't understand is they can block gay marriage. They can ignore that gay couples already are raising children but the younger generation is not ashamed to come out. They are not going to forgo having children if they want them. By trying to define a family as a momand a dad and a child or children will dismiss more and more people and those left out will just ignore the conservatives.Trying to make it that Only a straight man can marry a straight woman will exclude many and they will just live together. Hell, many young straight couples aren't getting married anyway.So family can and will always be defined in a broad way.
@moonlitmagikchild (22181)
• United States
14 Jan 09
i think its good because the world is made up of so many different type of people and personalities that one way will not fit all
@camomom (7535)
• United States
19 Jan 09
It's no different then a single mother/father and grandmother/father raising children together. Same gender parents are just as good as single parents or sometimes even better. They are also just as good as opposite gendered parents.
@jazel_juan (15747)
• Philippines
14 Jan 09
well technically a family must have a father, mother and kids of course but then if we take it in a different sense, if a unit is just composed of a mother and her kids, they can be called a family if they act as one, the mother can take on the role of both the father and the mother and can supply the needs of the kids in every aspect and the kids in return respect and love their mother like how they would love their father and mother then we can call them a family.. or if your aunt adopted you and treated you like her own and vice versa then for me, that is already a family...i do not take it literally on what a family is..a family cannot be called a family when the roles of each member is not being fulfilled. like when you are complete in the family in the sense that there is a mother and a father and kids but then you neglect each other, the mother does not care for everyone and the father does not do his obligations and the kids does not care then that is not a family at all... well i hope you understand what i am trying to say:)
@glords (2614)
• United States
16 Jan 09
Tolerance is a good... no great thing, though sometimes I worry that we are not becoming more tolerant, but rather just apathetic. People don't care what their neighbors are doing. They don't care about anyone but themselves. People are becoming more and more isolated. Though we should accept non-traditional families we should accept them and provide them with support and care, not just ignore them in the name of tolerance. Though single parents do an excellent job or parenting, it is a struggle and they could use a hand.
@suzzy3 (8342)
•
12 Jan 09
The prospect of the same gender raising a child is somewhat new in our society it is a social experiment we will just have to see if their peers will accept this as normal.Most kids have a mummy or a daddy or if they are lucky both.We will have to sit back and wait to see if if it makes any difference being raised in a same gender relationship no doubt they will get love and nurture ,it will be when the kids go to school and their peers will accept them with two mummys or two daddys.Will they get ribbed and be made to feel different or will it make a blind bit of difference bearing in mind all kids like to be the same is yet to be seen.During the war all kids were brought up by a all female house hold and seem to have done really well.A family is a concept of being brought up in security and love although both gender role model this could be a grandad ,uncle,ect for a single parent or mother,sister for a male raising a family.They also need to be taught how to behave and to respect each other and others property,manners and ideally end up with a well rounded individual who can enter the world and contribute to it in a responsible way.Some mum and dad family are not all sucessful and let the children down or the children let the family down nothing is perfect and every way of raising the next generations of kids and not leaving them langishing in a care home is not ideal for any child ,every child deserves a family and the normalalty and love that should bring.
@Frederick42 (2024)
• Canada
11 Jan 09
The most important thing in a family is love and unity. It does not matter if both the partners are of the same gender; if they can love the child and teach unity, then that family will definitely be a success. Love is the keyword here.
@reshadar (112)
• United States
13 Jan 09
Well said! I have found that, above all else, if a child feels loved, they will become a happier adult. I'm a single mother that has been able to form a wonderful friendship with my son's father. I have never been jealous of the love that my son feels for him, because in my eyes, the more good people that love my son (and that he loves back), the better off that he will be in life. Because the both of us want what is best for our son, our trust and respect for each other has allowed us to concentrate purely on our son - not on who is a better parent, or who does what how, or who is right and who is wrong - and we are able to clearly communicate our love to our child in a way that leaves no doubt in his mind that he is loved. There is a saying that says, "the best thing a father can do for his children is to love their mother". You can add on to or replace the word love with respect and can interchange father and mother in that quote and it still rings true. Although we are not "in love" with each other, the love we feel for each other because of our son is simple, clear, and true and translates itself into the deep love we feel for our son. Because of this, our child knows that he is loved and, in the end, that is what matters the most. In addition to all of this, I have learned to include dear friends into my definition of family as well - I have friends that act much more like family to me than some in my birth family do. What it boils down to, like you said, is love. It doesn't matter if we are married, single, gay, straight, related by blood, related by marriage, related by friendship, whatever - as long as we love, we are family. So - I took a long, roundabout way to say exactly the same thing that you said LOL The most important thing in a family is love and unity.
@cyberfluf (4996)
• Netherlands
11 Jan 09
There are many reasons why there are more different types of families tolerated nowadays. One of the most important might be the individualisation throughout the world. People mind their own bussiness and aren't as envolved with the people around them anymore, and if they do, they keep their values to themselves and not push them onto someone else.
Also, there have been more social studies and the taboo of gay marriages, gay families, single families and so on have partially been lifted.
Academic studies have shown that there is no harm for children to be raised by gay parents, even though they do advise the parents to have a rolemodel of the other gender present for a longer period of time. For example: if two woman raise a child they can have a good male friend coming over from time to time and play with the child, so they'll have a male rolemodel aswell and visa versa.
I think it's a good thing we have become more openminded about this. A family is formed by both adults and children who love eachother more then anything and will support eachother through anything.
I have a foster brother myself and he is my family; he's not bloodrelated but he surely is my family as I love him dearly, he lives in the same house with me, my parents take care of him and he has been here ever since he was 13 days old.
The loving band people feel is more important than a blood band.
@stephcjh (38473)
• United States
11 Jan 09
I'm not sure what the basic concept for the meaning of a family is anymore. I am very confused as life changes all of us. I'm not sure who the role models would be. Everyone is different these days.
@GAUCI123 (1042)
• Malta
11 Jan 09
I am not against people who are gays or lesbians who lives together and have a relashionship, that is their life, if they are happy I will surley not object. The difficulty is when children are involved, I think that somehow children will be effected. I imagine a child at school how he suffers by bullies, or having all parents at school, does he will be embarased or the child will get used to it? These are questions that arise, well if I was in the situation I will not want my child to suffer, so I will not adopt any children for sure.
@zhuhuifen46 (3483)
• China
11 Jan 09
My understanding of a family is as follows,
Family is a very important compound in mankind. It is closely linked with the stability and harmony of the society. For its members, it is what motivates his or her endeavor to seek for accomplishments, and it is also where he or she finds shelter when encountering obstacles. For a happy family, earnest love is the basis, sense of responsibility fosters a rigid framework, and humour serves the adhesive.
@snowcat46 (2322)
• United States
11 Jan 09
Just like in a regular family. There's usually one person better at dealing with emotional problems, and one better at dealing with teaching. One better at coping with frustration, another better at showing how to cope. Even in a regular family, the best role model for something isn't the usual. Men don't always have to be the driving instructor, women don't always have to be the emotional support. Each person has their own gifts, not dependant on their gender. My kid would have been in sorry shape if I'd had to teach her how to cook!
