would you rather get $ or a gift?

@miccant (154)
United States
February 11, 2009 12:22pm CST
I have a sister inlaw that would only like to get money and not a gift. She sent an email to all the family at christmas. I think that is kind of selfish what if the person found a special gift that was just right for you. I would like to have the gift since more of yourself goes into picking the right gift. How about you do you want money or a gift? Would you tell someone that all you want is money?
6 people like this
38 responses
@sandymay48 (2031)
• Canada
11 Feb 09
I would never tell someone what to give me as a gift or whether to give money or a gift...That should be left up to the individual who is doing the giving. The thought is what counts and I would be happy if someone thought enough of me to give me anything at all.
@SomeCowgirl (32271)
• United States
11 Feb 09
I am not sure what your sister in law said in her email but I know if I were to make an email to everyone and ask for money and not gifts I would tell them why I needed the money instead of the gifts. I would also say that if they had already gotten a gift then they don't have to return it and that you would be happy with whatever they got me. Everyone needs money and I think family would be the most likely to understand why. Asking isn't all that bad as long as you tell the people your asking money from why.
2 people like this
@bamakelly (5194)
• United States
11 Feb 09
It is true that everyone needs money. I can sort of understand your viewpoint here. Asking might not be all that bad in certain cases. There might be a good reason for it. The family might need it for some reason and there might be those willing to give more money to someone in need around a special occasion like a birthday or holiday.
1 person likes this
@megumiart (3781)
• United States
11 Feb 09
I like recieving money, lol. My favorite type of gift to recieve is something hand-made and on-of-a-kind from someone. It's just so special. But otherwise, I think I'd rather recieve money that something store-bought. x3
2 people like this
@bamakelly (5194)
• United States
11 Feb 09
That sounds like a great suggestion or idea for something to be hand made. There is just something sentimental about that kind of thing. Yes. I would also rather receive the money than something store bought all the way around.
1 person likes this
@mamabeezy (172)
• United States
11 Feb 09
I think it's about 50/50 for me... It's a great idea to get money, just because you'll know the person will get whatever they choose with that money. I also love getting gifts. It shows your true appreciation/love for that person. And that you pay attention to their likes/dislikes. And they can always take it back and get something else if it doesn't work out
2 people like this
@dreamy1 (3815)
• United States
11 Feb 09
Ugh! That is extremely, extremely, tacky of her to do that. Sounds like she has no manners at all. It's one thing for the gift giver to ask what do you want but it's another thing to outright demand money. If I got her email I certainly wouldn't give someone so ungrateful anything at all except for maybe a card. Yes I would personally prefer money but I would never tell them and I would appreciate any gift I was given. If she is so desperate for money she needs to make sure the person includes a gift receipt then she can get the cash if she wants. Does your SIL when giving gifts only give cash?
1 person likes this
@miccant (154)
• United States
11 Feb 09
Thats how I was feeling about it. I was going to buy her something anyways but my husband said no. Its his sister so we gave her a visa card. No she gives the cheapest gifts she can buy. The price of the gift doesnt matter its the thought of it that counts. I can get a yard sell angel and that would be just fine with me. I collect all kinds of angels
@miccant (154)
• United States
11 Feb 09
The sad part is she has no bills. Her and her kids live with her mom and she pays nothing to stay there.
@dreamy1 (3815)
• United States
11 Feb 09
Wow she sounds totally ungrateful. She wants people to spend money on her but she doesn't want to do the same. Sure the price shouldn't matter but she sounds greedy.
1 person likes this
@HansonFan (1659)
• United States
11 Feb 09
I would want the gift. Gifts seem much more personal and special. Sometimes people don't really know what to get so they have to give money or a giftcard, which is fine. I hate giving them and only do so if the person is really picky or if I haven't been able to see them in awhile and don't know what they would like, such as family during Christmas and such. I wouldn't mind giving money as a gift if they are having a hard time and need help, though. That's a different situation.
1 person likes this
@miccant (154)
• United States
11 Feb 09
I agree with you. I think it should be up to the person giving the gift.
@HansonFan (1659)
• United States
11 Feb 09
Glad to have helped. Thank you for the BR!
@nzalheart (2352)
• India
12 Feb 09
Certainly a gift. Gift are always special and specially when the friends think hard to select a best gift for me...
1 person likes this
@jimbo88 (231)
• Indonesia
12 Feb 09
I like your comment. You are unique person.
1 person likes this
@TnWoman (1896)
• United States
11 Feb 09
hello miccant no i would not ask somebody for just money for my gift. i would rather have a gift from somebody than have any money. and if you can't afford to buy me a gift, then do not worry about getting me anything. i like gifts and gift cards. it doesn't matter to me what that i recieve. and i also enjoy giving gifts out as well as getting gift cards and gas cards as gifts. if i know the person who that i am buying a gift for, i will buy them a gift but if i do not know the person who that i am buying a gift for all that well, then i will purchase a gas card or a gift card for them to use. one of my brother-in-laws each year loves to recieve a Barnes and Noble's book gift card so that he can go to the book store himself and purchase what kind of a book that he wants to read. take care and have a beautiful afternoon.
@miccant (154)
• United States
11 Feb 09
Thanks for the response.
• United States
11 Feb 09
I would want the gift. I think that the gift is more personal and represents the relationship you have with that person. Money and Gift Cards show that you don't know each other very well or that the person is very picky. I go out of my way looking for the perfect gift so that i can give someone that perfect gift. That will put a smile on their face.
1 person likes this
@miccant (154)
• United States
11 Feb 09
thank you for the post
• Mexico
11 Feb 09
I would like to recieve money because I can spend it in whatever I what..and when it comes to gifts I am very picky... and for that reason sometimes I donĀ“t like the gifts I get
1 person likes this
@miccant (154)
• United States
11 Feb 09
but would you say thank you anyways or tell them they should of gave you money?
@CatGods (4596)
• United States
11 Feb 09
Well my family knows I'm saving for my trip which is going to happen the 2nd week of May. So for Christmas I asked for money. My birthday is in April and guess what I want? Money. I'm going to see the Chin terra cotta statues and the King Tut exhibit in Atlanta Georgia. Please view my profile, there are links above and below my avatar, thank you.
1 person likes this
@miccant (154)
• United States
11 Feb 09
I hope you get the money for your trip. That would be cool.
@jojoba (40)
• Lithuania
11 Feb 09
Well it is better to tell everyone the truth.. Also, I think it is even more convenient for you, since you can spend more time in search of gifts for other family members ;) It is really hard to guess what is on other person mind, isn't it? What if she doesn't actually need your gift but is in difficult financial situation? If you cherish your sister-in-law, the only thing you want is to make her feel happy. I also try to tell everyone what I would like to have for my birthday, Christmas or whatever.. It does not mean that I do not accept gifts, which are not included on my list =P And I am happy to receive money as well as gifts.
@bamakelly (5194)
• United States
11 Feb 09
I agree with you that it is better to tell the truth. It is hard to know what someone wants for their birthday or Christmas. To tell you the truth I would just like to have a nice gift certificate or something. Kind of like the gift that keeps on giving.
1 person likes this
@Jae2619 (1484)
• United States
11 Feb 09
I would rather have a gift. It means the person actually put some thought into it when getting it for me. Money is always nice but it's not as personal. The only time I give money for a gift is for graduations.
1 person likes this
@miccant (154)
• United States
11 Feb 09
Thank you for the post. I agree
@cream97 (29169)
• United States
11 Feb 09
I would rather get the money if they are unsure of what to get for me. But, I would love the gift because it may be special of what they want to give to me. I would cherish both. It is something.. I could not be selfish.. I would be happy to know that they think of me in a nice way to even get me something..
1 person likes this
@miccant (154)
• United States
11 Feb 09
Hi cream97. Thank you for the post.
@22angel22 (451)
• United States
12 Feb 09
I'd rather have money from my mom and gifts from other people. Thats usually the way it happens in my house. My mom used to always tell my dad that she wanted Money for Mothers day, B-day, and any other time. She always said don't waste your money on flowers, just give me the cash!
1 person likes this
@mammamuh (582)
• Sweden
12 Feb 09
It depends. I rather get money than a gift that I will never use. I have several of them around my house. Gifts that I can use and/or is things I want I gladly take, it's just those things that I'll put away that are so useless to get - both for me and for the person that gave it to me. WHen we have a tight budget money would be more welcome. This Christmas we told people not to buy toys for our kids - the bigger ones got vouchers for clothes and things they needed and that's appriciated! We mostly gets things we need and asks for - the other stuff sadly gets into some box and will be sold/given away after a few years.
1 person likes this
@dropofrain (1168)
• India
12 Feb 09
I think I would love to get gifts provided they are nice. Otherwise I would prefer to take cash only. Though, taking cash is little rude but I prefer a combination of both the things together.
1 person likes this
• United States
12 Feb 09
That's a bit rude .
1 person likes this
@whkaren (25)
• China
12 Feb 09
i would not. it is should be others who decide if they want to give me gife or money, not me. whatever they give me, i will be happy.
1 person likes this
@reichiru (748)
• Canada
12 Feb 09
Well it's kinda selfish if all you ask for is money. I do that for my birthdays from my parents though, only because I'm not really lacking in anything, so getting money and then saving it up is sometimes a good idea. But if someone really doesn't know what to get me, I would tell them to get me a gift card, and not actual cash money. But a gift is always better, since I know that they took the time and effort into picking an actual item for me.
1 person likes this