Do you believe in fate? How about predestiny?

Ah... the all never ending debate of nurture vs nature. I guess how we deal with what fate hands us, that will determine our destiny in life. Like I mentioned in a previous reply, fate and destiny are like roads and doors in our journey through life. It will only show us the way. We still have to walk the paths. Or go through the doors if we want to excel in life. Where we end up will ultimately depends on how we handle the journey or how we enter the doors.

Well, I would say nurture does play a part in the way we look at things and the way we deal with things. Think of it this way. If you are always in the presence of some one who never say die in the face of failure. And you see that when he doesn't say die, he will find ways and means to become successful. And you see that he succeeded. And under his wing, you are constantly exposed to his kind of thinking. Exposed to his way of thought and the way he handles things. You wouldn't be influenced in anyway? So much so that one day, when you do face with failures of your own, you will just jump right back on the saddle and try again. Like they say, birds of a feather, flock together. Or as the chinese saying goes, "Jin Zhu Zhe Chi, Jin Mo Zhe Hei" (loosely translate, Being near to red, you get stained red. Being near to black, you get stained black). Our environment, our surroundings, our interactions with people around us, all will alter our behavior in some way or another. If that is not a way of nurturing, then what is? Let me quote you an example of an extreme case. Take for example, you do something like eating your favorite cheese cake. And then your mother comes up to you and give you a slap for putting that cheese cake in your mouth. You feel the pain and you rubbed it off. Then you attempt to eat the cheese cake again. And again you get slapped on the face. This repeats for many times, and you keep feeling the pain of the slap each time you try to eat the cake but never got the chance to. Will you still continue to attempt to eat that cake? Knowing full well that the moment your spoon touches the cake, you are gonna get slapped all over again. Or would you place the spoon down and walk away to look for something else to eat? That is an extreme case of nurture. And it has got nothing to do with your character whatsoever. Agree?

thing is, character decides which door to enter or how we handle the journey. it's exactly like the red or blue pill scene. character decides how we react to situations and thus what happens to us. given the same scenario, different people choose different paths. some takes failure as a form of encouragement, they'll just work harder. some takes failure as a sign and just allow themselves to fall. some takes rejection well and improve upon themselves. others take rejection as the reason for why they fail. so does nurture play a part?

ha ha ha ha ha... you have a point there too. Which is why I say that things are sort of already predefined. Whether we do it the long way or the short way, will ultimately depend on the choices we make. In this case, we are both making the same choice of engaging each other on this topic.

Yes, I do believe that there are many things that are beyond my control. The thing is this, when you face up to something that you cannot control, what do you do? Do you blame it on fate and then raise your hands in asperation and do nothing about it? Like I mentioned before, fate and destiny has already predefined some sort of destination in life for us. It is a matter of the choices we make that will determine whether we get to that destination in a short time or a long time. Or whether the choices will bring us around the long way such that we run out of time to reach the destination.

fate is not something that you blame on or not fate never ignores your own efforts fate is just the way the world works i guess fate makes us have conversation about fate now.

Yeah... like I mentioned in my previous reply. Fate and destiny are like roads and doors in our journey through life. It will only show us the way. We still have to walk the paths. Or go through the doors if we want to excel in life. And with each path we take, each door opens to a different path which may deviate from our original path. The end destination will never be known till we walked the whole journey and go thru all the opend doors.

Agree.

Yeah, very true ^_^ Fate and destiny are just openings.. We still have to walk our own path ^_^ Success and failures are all in our own hands ^_^ When one door closes, the other opens.. IT's up to us to find which is the door.. If one decides to remain put, there's nothing fate can do also.. haha =D

Then I guess you have to be working harder to learn how to recognize a good door when you see one. Or if your earlier post mentioned, you are feeling the butterfly effect of an earlier action? You never know for sure eh? But it is good that you are making the most out of every choice you make. That in itself is worthy of commendation. Keep up the good work my friend!

Yeah, the ripple theory. I heard of that theory when I was doing a little read up on Buddhism. It is an interesting theory. In that every thing we do, the effects of how that action we took, and how it interacts with our surroundings will alter how that action will affect us in return. The cause and consequence of everything we do. Very interesting read. And if you believe that theory, it would mean that it is possible that you are leading the life you are leading due to a cause in some other time line or lifetime. So the consequence of that cause is the life you are leading. It is very complex to be discussing it all in just one post. Lots of reading and chatting will be needed to fully understand this ripple and cause&conseqence effect theories. Well, to me, fate and destiny are like roads and doors in our journey through life. It will only show us the way. We still have to walk the paths. Or go through the doors if we want to excel in life. You probably been opening all the wrong doors and walking down all the wrong paths.

Yeah, the RIGHT doors are either stuck shut or locked and I can't find the key! I must admit, though, that whichever doors I've been walking through, I've always made the most of things.

Yes... I agree that there isn't only one road in life. In fact, there are many. But we are given only one destination. And we can get there via any road we choose. The end is still the same, we end up in the place that we are meant to be. Just like trying to get to Rome. There are so many roads that lead to Rome. Which ever one you choose, you will still get to Rome. But how you get there and how fast you get there will really be dependant on what road you choose.

Oh, I see your point there. I believe there's one place we'll always be led into and that's with God our creator.

I do not fully comprehen your statement. Can you elaborate?

an old chinese saying--the times produce their heroes.

Yeah, I kinda agree with you on that. Fate and destiny are like roads and doors in our journey through life. It will only show us the way. We still have to walk the paths. Or go through the doors if we want to excel in life.

Point noted.

Yeah~~! The problem lies with choice. I guess we are all meant to be who we are by some reason. Sort of like a predetermined destination in life we have to be at. The choices we make only determines how we get there. If we make the right choices, we would get there faster. If we make the wrong choices, we would get there slower. It is a matter of how fast or how slow we get there. And ultimately, whether we have enough time to reach there. So fate, in that sense, has already predetermined what is going to happen to us. The question is when, whatever fate has planned for us, will happen. How soon or how late it happens will depend on the route in life we take to journey to the destination that fate has already decided for us.

Agree with you. Fate and destiny are more like roads and doors in our journey through life. It will only show us the way. We still have to walk the paths. Or go through the doors if we want to excel in life. How we handle the situation at each point on that path or door will determine which other doors or path will be revealed to us.

Yeah... sort of like an unwritten book. All the chapters are planned. The ending decided. Just that how the story pans out, it is still in the works. So we, the star of the story of our life, will fill in the details of the chapter that we are in. Interesting. Thanks for sharing that insight my friend.