Should I tell him im seeing someone?

United States
February 19, 2009 2:02am CST
Hey everyone. My babyfather and I have been separated for about 4 months now. We are friends. And see eachother almost everyday. About every other day he is telling me how he loves me and wants to be with me but I don't feel the same way back. We had made an agreement to tell eachother when we found someone. I met someone recently who I am starting to like but im not sure if I should tell him. I will feel bad telling him. I know he will not take the news good. And I know he will ask me a bunch of questions. WHAT SHOULD I DO?? :(
2 people like this
6 responses
@azeemjz (445)
• Pakistan
19 Feb 09
Well the first thing that I observed is that you are a mother of a child so you and your husband not want to live together doesnt matter. But you have a child there in your life so think about that child and then take a step for you. And the most important thing that I want to tell you is that kindly do not post your personal matters on internet because the third person when involve into your personal life is not good. And may be your husband is good and with the advice of the third person you destroy your personal life. So just think of your child first and then take your step.
1 person likes this
@achinthya (1219)
• India
22 Feb 09
hi, thats true if the third person comes it ruins everything, like too many cooks spoil the broth.
1 person likes this
23 Feb 09
You need to take this new relationship very slowly as it is early days and has only been a short while since your seperation. I would however tell your ex partner that you have met someone with whom you feel more than just friendship. He deserves to know the truth and that there is no chance of the two of you getting back together. Reassure him that you are not rushing in to things and that the safety and well being of your child will always come first and that you will always keep him informed about any major changes in your childs life and that he will never be pushed out. The longer you leave telling him the harder it will become. There will never be a right moment to tell him. Whenever you tell him he will feel hurt and rejected and probably not take it well. Yes there will be questions but they will always be asked regardless of when you tell him. In my opinion it is going to be easier telling him there is the possibility of you becoming involved and then he is prepared for it rather than launching straight in to telling him you are in love with another man. I wish you all the luck and happiness in the world.
1 person likes this
@n30wing (4771)
• Philippines
22 Feb 09
If I were you I rather just let it flow. Well there is always a right time for everything, if your instinct is not telling you so, just be it, but you rather not to expect more, cause when you expect you get hurt. Just be yourself, and be happy with life, cause you deserve too. Have a nice day!
1 person likes this
• Canada
22 Feb 09
Take advice from a woman who has been there. Don't rush into things as you are just begining to know the guy. Don't bring him home either because you will confuse your child. If he still loves you..he won't take it too well that you have replaced him already. Also it isn't any of your business or his who you both see and trust me even if you don't feel for him you say..it will make you a pang when he replaces you. I think after 4 months of separation you already getting hooked up on someone..isn't a good thing. You have to give yourself some time and freedom, not get hooked up with a guy again. First you have to think of your child before you. We don't think that it effects kids but it does. I know my kids really suffered..only I didn't know it. I was so young..21 with 3 kids to care for. It's not good either to bring any guys home as I said because it will effect your child. I think you should stop and think what you want to do with your life. There is no such thing as being friends with an x..people like to think so but it's not true really. as ther are always will be some feelings whether you no longer love the person or not. Once you bond with someone sexually and sentimentaly and also have a child..it just doesn't go away even if you think so. You just got out of a relationship..why be in a hurry to be in another one. Beside you got to make sure what the guy is like, not many men want a woman with a kid. Give yourself some space..you have a kid to think of first before yourself.
@lynnemg (4540)
• United States
20 Feb 09
Be honest. That is the best solution. If you do not want to be withim, tell him so, and top giving him false hope. That is not fair to any of you involved.
1 person likes this
@ossan1 (97)
• Indonesia
24 Feb 09
Still secret for that. and..